Tiny Tales of Terror
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "Hush, Hush..."Multi-authored book of flash/micro horror fiction
45 total reviews
Comment from boxergirl
Well I like the fact that these are SHORT little horror tales. I couldn't hold my breath if it was any longer!
Picture adds another ounce of scariness. 8-)
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Well I like the fact that these are SHORT little horror tales. I couldn't hold my breath if it was any longer!
Picture adds another ounce of scariness. 8-)
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks, boxergirl. I appreciate your comments.
Comment from Mastery
Hi, DeanO Great stuff as usual, dood.. LOL...You need to be locked up in that place for real. Your mind is something to behold, my friend. this is another great tale. I'll bet when you were a lad you read "Tales From The Crypt " and all those comics, didn't you?
Suggestion: "Day and night, they sigh my name in soft, sing-song choruses." (This is stated in "present tense" The rest is "past tense" So one way ot the other...I think you want this to read "Day and night they SIGHED my name in soft...etc"
And: "blanketed in blood" Something better here? Perhaps...covered in blood or drenched in blood...something. Know what I mean?
Great job, my friend. Bob
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Hi, DeanO Great stuff as usual, dood.. LOL...You need to be locked up in that place for real. Your mind is something to behold, my friend. this is another great tale. I'll bet when you were a lad you read "Tales From The Crypt " and all those comics, didn't you?
Suggestion: "Day and night, they sigh my name in soft, sing-song choruses." (This is stated in "present tense" The rest is "past tense" So one way ot the other...I think you want this to read "Day and night they SIGHED my name in soft...etc"
And: "blanketed in blood" Something better here? Perhaps...covered in blood or drenched in blood...something. Know what I mean?
Great job, my friend. Bob
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Hey, thanks for taking a crack at this one, Bob, and for providing me with the awesome feedback. I'll look into making some adjustments to the potions of the story that you mentioned, my friend.
As always, I appreciate your readership, friendship...and the six stars ain't half bad either, lol.
Much obliged, Bob. :)
~DeanO
Comment from rod007
This is one of your best horror stories. The economy of words and the vivid description, stark images all blend together to create a terrible chill. Well done, Dean.
reply by the author on 15-May-2015
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This is one of your best horror stories. The economy of words and the vivid description, stark images all blend together to create a terrible chill. Well done, Dean.
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 15-May-2015
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Thanks, rod, and so sorry for the delayed reply. I got myself into a bit of a jam by reviewing and writing so much, and forgoing my replies. However, it in no way means that I don't appreciate your readership, your friendship, and your very generous six star rating because I do. All of it!
Thanks again, buddy, and have a fantastic weekend...~Dean ;)
Comment from robina1978
Just the photo is scary, complements your story perfectly. I would not like to read this at bed time. Juliette hears voices all the time that tell her to kill her family, she resists them but then kills her whole family. Because she had these mental symptoms, she gets admitted for psychiatric evaluation. She seduces a male nurse, then kills him and escapes. Brilliant story.
reply by the author on 15-May-2015
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Just the photo is scary, complements your story perfectly. I would not like to read this at bed time. Juliette hears voices all the time that tell her to kill her family, she resists them but then kills her whole family. Because she had these mental symptoms, she gets admitted for psychiatric evaluation. She seduces a male nurse, then kills him and escapes. Brilliant story.
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 15-May-2015
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Hey, sorry for the delayed reply, Ine.
I got a little bit behind in my replies. I've been dong quite a bit of writing lately...
However, it in no way means that I don't appreciate your readership, and your exceptional six star rating. That's very kind of you, and I'm really happy to know that you enjoyed it.
Take care, my friend...
~Dean
Comment from Linda Engel
Oh Dean. another gruesome tale I read this one in the morning. A tale of voices swimming in her head demanding, encouraging, the slaughter of those close to her. Yuk! keeping the body parts to smell. gross. but then that is what makes your stories so great. What can I say I still have mom in a box under my bed.
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Oh Dean. another gruesome tale I read this one in the morning. A tale of voices swimming in her head demanding, encouraging, the slaughter of those close to her. Yuk! keeping the body parts to smell. gross. but then that is what makes your stories so great. What can I say I still have mom in a box under my bed.
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks, Linda. Much obliged...
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Dean - another very well told horror story. Clearly an extreme case of Schizophrenia. Tension starts to build up half way through the story and the reader is anxious to know what is in Juliette's 'stash'. The only flaw I could find in this is how did she get this revolting stash into the hospital - not easily I would say. And how would she carve a hole in the wall? No sharp implements in a psychiatric ward. Enjoyed the read and it reminded me of a case where a young man did actually kill his parents under the same mental condition. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Hi Dean - another very well told horror story. Clearly an extreme case of Schizophrenia. Tension starts to build up half way through the story and the reader is anxious to know what is in Juliette's 'stash'. The only flaw I could find in this is how did she get this revolting stash into the hospital - not easily I would say. And how would she carve a hole in the wall? No sharp implements in a psychiatric ward. Enjoyed the read and it reminded me of a case where a young man did actually kill his parents under the same mental condition. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks, Dorothy...
Warmest regards. ~Dean
Comment from Louise Michelle
Hi Dean,
'At my trial, the jury agreed' is an excellent line that is subtle while getting the message across.
Good grisly ending with a graphic to match. Like that alliteration? Come a little closer - I can't hear you, hee hee.
Hugs,
Lou
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Hi Dean,
'At my trial, the jury agreed' is an excellent line that is subtle while getting the message across.
Good grisly ending with a graphic to match. Like that alliteration? Come a little closer - I can't hear you, hee hee.
Hugs,
Lou
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks, Lou...
Comment from Michaelk
Great story, short and to the point, but still with plenty of detail. Ah, 'God told me', the excuse used to justify so many things over the years. I have to wonder if God just shakes his head every time someone uses that excuse.
I'd rate Juliette about a six and a half on the sick puppy scale. There are more disturbing things she could've collected. I just wonder how she kept the stench from giving her away and how did she get it there to begin with. I doubt the cops are going to say, 'oh, a bag of fingers from your victims? Sure, you can take that with you.'
Perhaps she stored them in her 'purse' which would take her up a notch on the sick puppy scale.
A chilling little tale, mostly for its plausibility, well done.
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Great story, short and to the point, but still with plenty of detail. Ah, 'God told me', the excuse used to justify so many things over the years. I have to wonder if God just shakes his head every time someone uses that excuse.
I'd rate Juliette about a six and a half on the sick puppy scale. There are more disturbing things she could've collected. I just wonder how she kept the stench from giving her away and how did she get it there to begin with. I doubt the cops are going to say, 'oh, a bag of fingers from your victims? Sure, you can take that with you.'
Perhaps she stored them in her 'purse' which would take her up a notch on the sick puppy scale.
A chilling little tale, mostly for its plausibility, well done.
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks for your feedback, Michael... Much obliged, mate.
~Dean
Comment from mfowler
OooH! This little horror gem never stops shocking. The revelations via the mad voice of the female perp really build and build. I'm not sure what she said at the end. I wasn't game to come close enough to listen. Something a about a DOG telling her, but I was too damned chilled to come any closer.
Excellent and very creepy horror in this. You are doing a sensational job with this book, Dean.
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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OooH! This little horror gem never stops shocking. The revelations via the mad voice of the female perp really build and build. I'm not sure what she said at the end. I wasn't game to come close enough to listen. Something a about a DOG telling her, but I was too damned chilled to come any closer.
Excellent and very creepy horror in this. You are doing a sensational job with this book, Dean.
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks for taking a look at the story, Mark. I appreciate your comments.
~Dean
Comment from Glasstruth
Wow! What a powerful tale of insanity. You covered this with such expertise, as if you... well, lets just say it's perfectly written. I don't think mental illness is fully realized in this country. Just because someone knows something is illegal and was preplanned is not insanity in court. That's hogwash. You covered this brilliantly. Les
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Wow! What a powerful tale of insanity. You covered this with such expertise, as if you... well, lets just say it's perfectly written. I don't think mental illness is fully realized in this country. Just because someone knows something is illegal and was preplanned is not insanity in court. That's hogwash. You covered this brilliantly. Les
Comment Written 10-May-2015
reply by the author on 11-May-2015
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Thanks for your feedback, Les. I appreciate you having a go at the story.
~Dean
