Poems By AnnieDawn
Viewing comments for Chapter 49 "My Little Butterfly"My book of poems and stories
18 total reviews
Comment from frogbook
Quite a lovely description as well as amazing photo of this little wonder. Great description and alliteration also. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 28-May-2016
Quite a lovely description as well as amazing photo of this little wonder. Great description and alliteration also. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 28-May-2016
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My little butterfly just flits from one curiosity to another. She is really the light of my life. Thanks for reviewing. Have a great weekend.
Comment from I am Cat
As promised, I"ve changed the rating to a five! Well done... this is exactly what the site is about... learning! Great luck to you in the contest! ;)
Cat
Hello,
Lovely gorgeous girl! I love the photo... and this poem is adorable... let me tell you WHY I gave the four star rating, which I am VERY pleased to come back and change to a five once you meet the requirements of the contest. (if it wasn't for the contest, I would gladly give the five) But it states you must have one alliteration per line (which I assume means two words must start with the same letter, correct...?)
this line:
Gracing lips of my sweet pea
doesn't have one. Easy to fix! ;)
Just replay back once it's fixed and I'm VERY happy to come back and change to a five star! ;)
Once again, a lovely poem with a VERY adorable photo!
Good luck in the contest (but please fix or I'm afraid you'll be DQ'd) ;)
Hugs!
Cat
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
As promised, I"ve changed the rating to a five! Well done... this is exactly what the site is about... learning! Great luck to you in the contest! ;)
Cat
Hello,
Lovely gorgeous girl! I love the photo... and this poem is adorable... let me tell you WHY I gave the four star rating, which I am VERY pleased to come back and change to a five once you meet the requirements of the contest. (if it wasn't for the contest, I would gladly give the five) But it states you must have one alliteration per line (which I assume means two words must start with the same letter, correct...?)
this line:
Gracing lips of my sweet pea
doesn't have one. Easy to fix! ;)
Just replay back once it's fixed and I'm VERY happy to come back and change to a five star! ;)
Once again, a lovely poem with a VERY adorable photo!
Good luck in the contest (but please fix or I'm afraid you'll be DQ'd) ;)
Hugs!
Cat
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thank you so much for the correction. I thought I understood what alliteration meant but guess I didn't. I looked it up and finally found a site that gave a very clear explanation and saved it. I love working with these new types of poetry as it is such a new exciting experience. Your review is fine if you want to leave it. I appreciate your time. Have a great weekend.
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You are so welcome. I thought it was just an oversight as all the other lines had alliterations already! ;) As promised, I have amended the rating to a five. ;)
It's a lovely poem and I wish you great success in the contest!
Cat
Comment from Cumbrianlass
This is so nice. You capture the sweetness of this little girl, the innocence and the enthusiasm. Wonderful poem, written with a delicate touch. It meets the requirements too. I hope you do well with this.
Av
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
This is so nice. You capture the sweetness of this little girl, the innocence and the enthusiasm. Wonderful poem, written with a delicate touch. It meets the requirements too. I hope you do well with this.
Av
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thank you very much for reviewing. Have a great weekend.
Comment from foxangie123
She is such a beautiful princess. So really adorable. You are such a great mom to write and tribute her as she is to have you love her gorgeous little self.
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
She is such a beautiful princess. So really adorable. You are such a great mom to write and tribute her as she is to have you love her gorgeous little self.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thank you so much for reviewing. Have a great weekend
Comment from enitsalemap
This is a good response to the writing prompt Rhyming Alliterisen and is the first one I have had an opportunity to read. I loved my little granddaughters when they were first toddling. So different from the boys (although they were sweet in their own way) This is good work.
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
This is a good response to the writing prompt Rhyming Alliterisen and is the first one I have had an opportunity to read. I loved my little granddaughters when they were first toddling. So different from the boys (although they were sweet in their own way) This is good work.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thank you very much for taking the time to review my poem. Have a great day.
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you are welcome
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion, an absolutely lovely poem, to commemorate an exciting stage of your child's life - lyrical in its perfect rhyme and in compliance with the prompt - only suggestion would be to correct the word "toddlers" to "toddler's" in the second line, unless it somehow affects the structure of the poem - if it does, perhaps changing the word, for grammatical accuracy only, to "child's" ?
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
In my opinion, an absolutely lovely poem, to commemorate an exciting stage of your child's life - lyrical in its perfect rhyme and in compliance with the prompt - only suggestion would be to correct the word "toddlers" to "toddler's" in the second line, unless it somehow affects the structure of the poem - if it does, perhaps changing the word, for grammatical accuracy only, to "child's" ?
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thank you so very much for reviewing. I will put the apostrophe in as I did omit that by mistake. Bad habit of mine. I used toddler for the syllable count though so cannot use child. Thank you though and have a great weekend.
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You are so welcome - I LOVED the poem - it is so reminiscent of my little girl's toddler years - thank you for a nostalgic read - Best of Luck in the contest...
Comment from GoodHearted Woman
Good job--has a baby feel, baby colors, perfect meter and syllables according to the guidelines. The author's love for this baby shines through from beginning to end. One fix I may have: Line 2--light my toddler's eager eye. That's all. Good luck in "the games." GoodHearted Woman Marcia
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reply by the author on 27-May-2016
Good job--has a baby feel, baby colors, perfect meter and syllables according to the guidelines. The author's love for this baby shines through from beginning to end. One fix I may have: Line 2--light my toddler's eager eye. That's all. Good luck in "the games." GoodHearted Woman Marcia
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thanks for your kind suggestion and it is good. I will use it. Have a great day.
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
The poem on face-value is very good. The picture is adorable! Unfortunately, it does not meet the requirements of the form in the contest. "Petal pink.." and "Pitter patter.." are the only alliterations I find in the poem, instead of an entire line alliterated. God bless and hugs, Susanne
Revised review:
As I stated above a very good piece. I apologize that I misunderstood the guidelines and thought that the entire line was to be alliterated. You have met the requirements of the form. A great job. Good luck in the contest. God bless and hugs, Susanne
"
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
The poem on face-value is very good. The picture is adorable! Unfortunately, it does not meet the requirements of the form in the contest. "Petal pink.." and "Pitter patter.." are the only alliterations I find in the poem, instead of an entire line alliterated. God bless and hugs, Susanne
Revised review:
As I stated above a very good piece. I apologize that I misunderstood the guidelines and thought that the entire line was to be alliterated. You have met the requirements of the form. A great job. Good luck in the contest. God bless and hugs, Susanne
"
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thank you for reviewing. Actually the contest rules only call for one alThliteration each line and not the whole line like one of the other contests. I do thank you for your kind attention to detail. Have a good day.