Wilderness Way
Wandering through the woods47 total reviews
Comment from Gloria ....
Oh boy this is a scary story, Ric. What is most cool about it, is what isn't said. I thought for a minute perhaps eating the stew was what caused the monster to appear, and perhaps it was.
Sorry I'm out of bullets or this fine story would get one. It's not easy writing a story in just a hundred words.
Super writing my friend,
Gloria
reply by the author on 15-Sep-2016
  |
Oh boy this is a scary story, Ric. What is most cool about it, is what isn't said. I thought for a minute perhaps eating the stew was what caused the monster to appear, and perhaps it was.
Sorry I'm out of bullets or this fine story would get one. It's not easy writing a story in just a hundred words.
Super writing my friend,
Gloria
Comment Written 15-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 15-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Gloria, for taking time to read my story. I'm glad you always seem to get what I'm trying to do, I just wish everyone could understand that sometimes what isn't said is more important that what is. Personally, I like leaving lots of thing open to the reader's imagination, letting them believe what they want to happen. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from LASARDaddy
I liked the Red Riding-Hood twist, it's a good twist.
"Finally I gave up waiting and went inside, ate the stew, and fell asleep.", is just telling me what happened. Chekhov said, "Don't tell me the moon is shining, show me the glint of light on broken glass."
Something like;
"A huge yawn and a grunting, groaning stretch (my third) sent me inside. A tasty bowl of the stew and another yawn or two sent me stumbling to the bed."
A good little story.
Thank you for posting it.
reply by the author on 15-Sep-2016
 |
I liked the Red Riding-Hood twist, it's a good twist.
"Finally I gave up waiting and went inside, ate the stew, and fell asleep.", is just telling me what happened. Chekhov said, "Don't tell me the moon is shining, show me the glint of light on broken glass."
Something like;
"A huge yawn and a grunting, groaning stretch (my third) sent me inside. A tasty bowl of the stew and another yawn or two sent me stumbling to the bed."
A good little story.
Thank you for posting it.
Comment Written 15-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 15-Sep-2016
-
Thanks for taking time to read my story. I have read many of Chekhov's offerings, even the studies that show there are only about 9 possible different stores. However, many times, what isn't said is more important that what is. Personally, I like leaving lots of things open to the reader's imagination, letting them believe what they want to happen. Every single line in a 100 word story can't all be showing. Can't think of a reason to say that "He tripped, stumbled, farted, and fell on his way to the bedroom after slurping and dribbling the hot stew down his chin that caused him to flip-over backwards in his chair as he was getting up." With only 100 words to use, sometimes we don't want to waste them when we can do something and get on in a hurry. Your comments and good intentions are appreciated, but please remember, many of the recommendations by teachers and writers are to help new writers understand some basic fundamentals. But, adding a bunch of verbs, adverbs, and adjectives usually just adds unneeded weight. Good Luck!
-
You're welcome. I enjoyed it.
-
All true for these short little things, I too struggle there all the time. Mostly I have trouble with anything less than 1,000 words, I'm a wordsmith, I love words. Sometimes I spend more time looking for that "Perfect" word than I do,writing it, then it's 110 words instead of 100. I did enjoy it.
Thanks again.
Paul
Comment from Mary Wakeford
Nailed it! I was first lured by the front porch swing, a welcoming sign. The bood speckles on the stove might have sent me back outside, but then I figured, well it could have been from a BEEF pot roast...Then that ending...God knows who you ingested and looks like your character is next to hit the bubbling crock! All in 100 words...Take a bow!
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
Nailed it! I was first lured by the front porch swing, a welcoming sign. The bood speckles on the stove might have sent me back outside, but then I figured, well it could have been from a BEEF pot roast...Then that ending...God knows who you ingested and looks like your character is next to hit the bubbling crock! All in 100 words...Take a bow!
Comment Written 14-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Mary Wakeford, for taking time to read my story. Yes, this kind of writing isn't for everyone. Heck, I didn't even sleep last night. (LOL!) Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from jpduck
I should have read this before lunch, shouldn't I? Most skilfully done, I thought, and there is no hint of curtailment or incompleteness as a result of making it one hundred words long. Good luck with the contest.
Adrian
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
I should have read this before lunch, shouldn't I? Most skilfully done, I thought, and there is no hint of curtailment or incompleteness as a result of making it one hundred words long. Good luck with the contest.
Adrian
Comment Written 14-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Adrian, for taking time to read my story. I hope it didn't make you too sick. (LOL!) Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from MissMerri
Definitely horrifying, Ric. This is such a tough assignment, but I think you done it well. There are always many questions in my mind at the end of a 100 word story, but I guess the reader's own imagination is supposed to fill in the blanks. You've given good description and plenty of drama. Good luck in this challenging contest. I saw nothing here to "correct" or change. MM
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
Definitely horrifying, Ric. This is such a tough assignment, but I think you done it well. There are always many questions in my mind at the end of a 100 word story, but I guess the reader's own imagination is supposed to fill in the blanks. You've given good description and plenty of drama. Good luck in this challenging contest. I saw nothing here to "correct" or change. MM
Comment Written 14-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, MissMerri, for taking time to read my story. I left a lot to the reader's imagination, which I often do, but it's hard not to get the sick jest of it. (LOL!) Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
-
I didn't find anything to "correct" in your story, but I certainly did in my review! Just so you'll know... I don't usually say "you done it well." LOL I guess the "you've" didn't quite make it from the keys to the page. But... I'm sure you knew what I meant anyway. I look forward to reading more of your stories. MM
-
MissMerri, my dear, I caught the done, but I've read enough of your work and reviews to know that isn't the norm. Sometimes I'm amazed at my blunders when I read things back. We hear in our heads what we are wanting to say. Our fingers have their own ideas. LOL! I appreciate you!
Comment from Ravenbrok
This story had an Interesting build up. I wasn't expecting an outside source, and in my mind, I was yelling for you not to eat the stew. Perhaps a Fried Green Tomatoes kind of image. I was sure the attack happened inside as indicated by the blood speckles on the stove, however, the opening of the door revealed it was outside. My imagery jumped a bit from the rickety cabin to a chalet. The tension held throughout the story, and I enjoyed the cliff-hanger at the end. It certainly fulfilled the horror genre.
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
This story had an Interesting build up. I wasn't expecting an outside source, and in my mind, I was yelling for you not to eat the stew. Perhaps a Fried Green Tomatoes kind of image. I was sure the attack happened inside as indicated by the blood speckles on the stove, however, the opening of the door revealed it was outside. My imagery jumped a bit from the rickety cabin to a chalet. The tension held throughout the story, and I enjoyed the cliff-hanger at the end. It certainly fulfilled the horror genre.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Ravenbrok, for taking time to read my story. Yes, rickety cabin, and chalet don't seem to go together, I agree, but if you had seen the rickety so-called chalet I rented for four days in the Smoky Mountains, the words would fit better. (LOL!) Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
-
Understood. lol.
Comment from Ulla
Wow, Ric, in hundred words you managed to write a whole horror story. No mean feat. I must say the ending made my imagination work on overdrive. Well done. I liked it. All the best. Ulla:))
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
Wow, Ric, in hundred words you managed to write a whole horror story. No mean feat. I must say the ending made my imagination work on overdrive. Well done. I liked it. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment Written 14-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Ulla, for taking time to read my story. I must admit that I never have high expectations when I enter horror stories, as they don't seem to be accepted as well. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from indigloaura
Well, crap. I'd really like more of this. A hundred words is not a lot, and I'm very impressed that you were able to build so much suspense and apprehension in so very little time. Well done!!
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
Well, crap. I'd really like more of this. A hundred words is not a lot, and I'm very impressed that you were able to build so much suspense and apprehension in so very little time. Well done!!
Comment Written 13-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Indigloaura, for taking time to read my story. I wish it is was longer too, as there just is only so much we can accomplish with 100 words. (LOL!) Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from mfowler
Now there's a big shock. This is not unlike Goldilocks when she entered the house, made herself comfortable, but discovered she was sharing with three bears. Of course, this is a whole lot more gory. The blood spatter near the stove might have helped any realisation, but the severed leg and growls in the dark certainly did. This was really well written and really is a mini-horror story. A good closure which is what flash tends to offer and you should do well. Best of luck.
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
Now there's a big shock. This is not unlike Goldilocks when she entered the house, made herself comfortable, but discovered she was sharing with three bears. Of course, this is a whole lot more gory. The blood spatter near the stove might have helped any realisation, but the severed leg and growls in the dark certainly did. This was really well written and really is a mini-horror story. A good closure which is what flash tends to offer and you should do well. Best of luck.
Comment Written 13-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, MFowler, for taking time to read my story. I've really had a mixed bag of reviews on this piece, and usually do when I try to leave a lot to the reader's imagination. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from Selina Stambi
Hello mystery writer,
You've put a 'highest violence' warning on this post - could it be a mistake? "
The conclusion left me with so many questions. Who do the red eyes belong to? What's the backstory?
Best wishes for the contest.
Sonali
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
|
Hello mystery writer,
You've put a 'highest violence' warning on this post - could it be a mistake? "
The conclusion left me with so many questions. Who do the red eyes belong to? What's the backstory?
Best wishes for the contest.
Sonali
Comment Written 13-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2016
-
Thank you so much, Selina, for taking time to read my story. I did put the violence warning because of the ending, knowing it most likely didn't need it. Only having 100 words, I started with the person walking in the event. Sometimes, I like to leave a lot to the reader's imagination and let them dream up what they want to believe happens. Your kind words, suggestions, and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)