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Betrayal

Viewing comments for Chapter 32 "Betrayal Chapter 32"
In the title.

40 total reviews 
Comment from Cindy Warren
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I hope the Rapier just blew away, but I doubt it. I wouldn't to that, because it would take away too much of the action. I'm betting on Grant and Peter beating him senseless when he shows up. And I hope Grant knows how to deliver a baby. I doubt it's a false alarm.

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 13-May-2021
    LOL, Cindy! I love your way of thinking, Grant and Peter beating him senseless!!! Lol. Thank you so very much for giving me your lovely thoughts on this part, you did make me laugh. Warm hugs, my friend. Sandra xxx
Comment from juliaSjames
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Exciting Sandra. I felt the tension as they waited out the storm. I was a university student in Jamaica one of the times a hurricane passed close. So much rain that the streets became raging rivers even after the rain stopped. I couldn't get back home. Goodness knows why I was out in the first place. A man took me over the river/street on his back!
Looking forward to the next chapter. I actually know someone called Storm. It would make a great baby name.

Well done given all the disruption of moving.

Stay safe healthy and calm

Blessings Julia

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 13-May-2021
    We were in Jamaica in 1989 when they had a hurricane. Scary!! I have to admire the way those who live through such horrors, just get up and move on, putting things back together again.
    Thank you so much for reading this part, Julia, and sharing your thoughts. I really appreciated it. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I was afraid you'd do this: post it mid-week when I rarely have any sixes left. This was especially clean, as well, and was well-paced and left on a suspenseful note. It would have been deserving of a six. Sorry, my dear!

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 13-May-2021
    Bless your heart, dear Jay! Just saying it was 'especially clean' was the six stars I was after, so thank you so very much! I haven't been able to write and review much these last few weeks because of our moving home. We move in tomorrow, then I'll have to wait a couple of days to get the Internet up and running. Then I'll be back to normal on here. Thanks again, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Pantygynt
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

An exciting episode as the hurricane strikes. This pathetic fallacy at its wildest. Maybe the storm is pinning down the ungodly for the moment but no doubt they will be back as soon as it eases I am sure.

When you post this late in the the week there are more apologies around than sixes, but I kept one back thinking you would need it.

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 13-May-2021
    Aw, bless you, Jim. I had to get this part out because we move tomorrow and won't have internet for a few days. And I hadn't posted for over two weeks and worried you'd all forget the story. From the reviews I've received it seems you haven't! That in itself was a lovely feeling.
    Thanks so much, my friend, for saving that lovely six stars for me, I'd give you a big hug in person if I was allowed! (social distancing, lol)
    I might not get to your next part for a few days, but as soon as we are on internet again, I'll head straight over. Thanks again, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from tfawcus
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I'm no longer stumped by stock-still! I suppose the farmer stands stock-still when his plough hits a tree stump. I've always loved tracing words back to their roots. Such richness in our language.
I felt for Monica. News from overseas often seems worse on the news than on the ground. I remember having the same feeling while I was living in England and my parents were living in Singapore during the race riots of 1964. It sounded as if the whole island was ablaze, but the reality was that unless you happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, life went on pretty much as normal.
I enjoyed your description of the hurricane but wondered why they weren't all in that purpose-built cellar. The birth contractions add a new element. You're building crisis upon crisis. Can't wait to see what happens next.

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 12-May-2021
    I love looking those expressions up, some have fascinating origins. I think I'll have to add a bit more from the last part, Tony, it's been two weeks since I last posted. In part 31 Grant told Peter to take the ladies down to the underground cellar while he collected a few things.
    I've been so busy with this move, it's not a job for the feint-hearted, or the elderly, and I'm both!! Lol. Thank you so much for the lovely review, and all the stars. I've never got any left this far into the week. I'll try to get another out this Sunday, or Monday. The big move is on Friday!
    I'm taking it that your parents were well away from those riots. You're right, the news reporters pick the most horrific parts to show on the television. Thank you again, my friend. :)) SAndra xxx
Comment from Ben Colder
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Sounds like baby birthing time in the middle of a hurricane. How sweet it is for Tanya. She will probably be needed in this case. LOL.
Sound as if they are safe, but we have more to contend with--good one Sandy.

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 12-May-2021
    Hi Chuck, thank you so much for reading this part, I've struggled finding time it's been such a busy few weeks, the last two especially so. I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part. I'll be looking for everyones and catching up soon. We finally move to our new home on Friday. I can't wait, but then we have to do the unpacking!! Such fun for us oldies. Warm hugs, dear friend. :)) Sandy. xxx
Comment from muffinmama
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is short but full of good stuff. Lots of tension and breath-holding.
I'm a very suspicious person so I was sure that Rapier was already there and was the one who had damaged the shutter that Grant thought had buckled.
And of course it was expected that Latifah would start having contractions.

Just a couple of comments:
-"Since having tasted Monica's a few weeks ago, he'd been badgering her ever since to make more." - 'ever since' is redundant

-"When Grant and Peter came back down, Tania would have laughed had someone told her, just a few weeks ago, how pleased she would be to see him." a bit awkward, something missing; for example:
When Grant and Peter came back down, Tania thought of how she would have laughed had someone told her, just a few weeks ago, how pleased she would be to see him.

Glad you're back!

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 12-May-2021
    Aw, thank you, Ryma. Our big move over is on Friday, and then we can start to relax a bit. Well, once we've unpacked all the boxes! lol. I've organised my sons and their wives to help. Bless them.

    Thank you so much for this really helpful review. That particular sentence, (which I have used,) was a real problem for me. I changed it so many times but couldn't get it right. And there it was, in your wonderful review! Perfect. Thank you, dear friend! Warm hugs. Sandra xxxx
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I can see that that "Flossie Flitch" is doing well, so your dedication to kid's poetry is doing well, revealing what a good all round writer you are. This is well written, with an ace description of the characters and their incredible strength in the face of adversity. Describing what happens in a hurricane would be tough, I wouldn't know, I've only seen severe sorta and their damage, not hurricanes, heh heh. Well done, great job, blessings Roy
Typo : Safety devices in (his) place. This?

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 12-May-2021
    Dear Flossie! I am so surprised at how well that poem is doing, I'm going to write more children's poems when my life settles down again. Moving is most definitely not for us oldies!
    Thank you so much for the lovely review, my friend. I was in Jamaica 35 years ago when one hit. I never want to be near one again! England doesn't have such things as hurricanes, tornados or earthquakes, thank goodness. Thank you for spotting that error, I'll go and sort it now. Keep well and safe, my friend. Warm hugs. Sandra. xxx
reply by royowen on 12-May-2021
    We don?t where I live, but a few tropical cyclones on the Northern east coast.
Comment from country ranch writer
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Stock still is a person coming completely still to access what is happening all around him or her.Sudden stop like in the calm of a eye stormer lull as some say.

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 12-May-2021
    Thank you so much for the lovely sixth star, my friend. I should think anyone would stand stock still in the eye, I wonder what it's like? Researching it, the eye is quite scary. Thanks again, my friend. Warm hugs. Sandra xx
Comment from Begin Again
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello, my dear friend.... I saved my last star for your post. I knew it would be exceptionally good. Hurricanes are nothing to laugh at... and this one definitely sounded like a whopper. Appears as if "Peanut' might be in a hurry to come out and see what all the excitement is about. wonderful as always. Smiles and hug, Carol

Are you settled in from the move? Hope all is well. Love ya...

 Comment Written 12-May-2021


reply by the author on 13-May-2021
    Aw, thank you so much, Carol! Your six stars are smiling down on me. Thank you so much for the lovely review. I'm so pleased you enjoyed it. We move tomorrow so won't have internet for a few days. I'll catch up with you as soon as we are. Warm hugs, dear friend. :)) SAndra xxx