Comment from Gunner Lil

Excellent

A very nice flash fiction story. The right amount of dialogue to move the story
along. An easy read with the reader wanting more. Nice pace.
Flash fiction story's are fun to read and write.
Thank you and good luck.

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thanks, Gunner. I think so too, although they're more difficult than many might think. I very much appreciate the positive feedback.

Comment from BeasPeas

Excellent

Oh, Dean. This very short story is scary. Truly gave me chills. Again, each word counts to propel your tale along to a diabolical ending. Marilyn

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thanks, Marilyn. But how on Earth did you know I wrote it? My name isn't showing up someplace is it? Good grief, that's all I need is to be disqualified again, LOL.
Thanks you very much for reading and critiquing my entry. ~Anon 4 Now ;)

reply by BeasPeas on 16-Jun-2015

Hi Dean. Well, I get your work in my mailbox whenever you write something. Sometimes I don't follow the contests at all, but read a lot of the work of poets I like. When I first opened your piece the title indicated it was, "Buried Alive." But I didn't see the title appearing anywhere on the poem page itself. That's when I e-mailed you about that. However in searching for it, I saw your name in purple on black background at the top right (almost not there and faint). Not sure if this e-mail makes sense or not. Marilyn

Comment from JourneyHolm

Excellent

Jeeeze, the disease of the mother is like no other that I've read before. The story wasn't all too terrifying until the imagery at the end with the pop and sizzle. What do you think she used for spices?

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Baby's Breath?

Thanks, JH. I really appreciate the feedback.
I've found that with flash and micro fiction, horror flash and micro fiction especially, if you get 'em in the end and save the shock until as long as you can up until the end, it usually goes over better with readers. I mean, let's face it, the only thing a reader's going to remember about a story is the ending. If you can't make them go, "Ah-ha!", and hopefully create a chill or shiver at the very end, then put a fork in ya, you're done.
Thanks again! ~Anon 4 Now

reply by JourneyHolm on 15-Jun-2015

Well said and thanks for the insight. I'll keep it in mind.

So that's why you always end with ~Dean ;)

reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Crap, did I? This is supposed to be a blind contest. I think you're beginning to see things, JH. Heh-heh...

Comment from Lynne

Excellent

Dang! I'll say!!! Urban Legends, much. LOL Short and to the point, no SPAG and the dialogue was spot on. Good luck!
D

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thank you for reading & commenting, Lynne. I really appreciate the feedback.
~Anon

Comment from meggie13

Excellent

The woman was crazy and did not realize what she had done. She meant to roast a chicken and instead roasted the her baby. Horror!! Excellent thriller and the picture used is perfect for your write. Great imagery. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thank you, Meggie. I initially had a much more...graphic photo, but no one was reading the story so I changed it. It must've worked because the feedback has more than tripled.
Thanks again for your thoughtful and encouraging comments. ~Anon 4 Now

reply by meggie13 on 15-Jun-2015

You are very welcome, Dean. I was horrible but that what horror is about. meggie :))

reply by Anonymous Member on 19-Jun-2015

You are very welcome, Dean. I was horrible but that what horror is about. meggie :))

reply by the author on 20-Jun-2015

Thanks again! :)

reply by meggie13 on 20-Jun-2015

You are very welcome.

Comment from dmt1967

Excellent

This is a spooky and horrifying story my friend. The ending sent a shiver down my spine. This is a very well written story, and although very short, kept my attention throughout. Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thank you very much for taking the time to read it, dmt, You should enter the contest yourself. It'll really tax your abilities.
Much obliged. :}

Comment from justafan

Excellent

I puked a lil in my mouth...thank you very much. You do delight in making us cringe. You are so very good at it too!!! Glad to know the baby is fine and family are not sick and demented.
Your artwork and fonts are lessons in how to sell a story. Brilliant!

Always justafan,
Missy

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thanks, Missy, and I realize now after posting this, and based on my reviews, that it was probably in bad...taste, heh-heh. But hey, at least it's not bloody and gory, right? Ever try to tell a one hundred word horror story about cooking an infant, without it being chock full of gore? It ain't easy.

Thanks again for the feedback. I appreciate it as always. :}

reply by justafan on 15-Jun-2015

bad taste...hahahaha

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is an excellent write, mystery writer, I love this story, the fake one and the real one. lol. I don't think i'll be going to her house for dinner though. good luck in the contest

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thanks, Pam.

Comment from Gloria ....

Excellent

Ha, good job, Dean on a terribly frightening tale of terror. Sounds like mommy finally blew her lid and put the baby in the roasting pot instead of chicken little.

I can't imagine why people think they can put those kinds of pics on Facebook and not get investigated. I personally find them in bad taste, but in a story like your tiny tale of terror, it works because it's totally fiction, right?

Gloria

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thanks for your comments, Gloria.

Comment from Michaelk

Excellent

Cannibalism, it's what's for dinner.
Your tale was well told. I could easily picture the mother appearing out of a mist and staring coldly at the daughter.
The image of her lovingly stroking a skinned chicken is somewhat disturbing to say the least.
Well told and sickening at the same time.

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2015

Thanks.