The Last Visit
A dying old cowboy story.33 total reviews
Comment from LisaMay
I enjoyed your ballad of the cowboy's last visit. It was interesting to hear of his life and times. I don't know much about cowboys of the old days in USA as I live in New Zealand. I worked on a cattle station in Western Australia for a few weeks during the muster and I sure got an insight into how hard the work was around the cattle, so to do it for a lifestyle would be tough for sure.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2019
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I enjoyed your ballad of the cowboy's last visit. It was interesting to hear of his life and times. I don't know much about cowboys of the old days in USA as I live in New Zealand. I worked on a cattle station in Western Australia for a few weeks during the muster and I sure got an insight into how hard the work was around the cattle, so to do it for a lifestyle would be tough for sure.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2019
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2019
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They are tough and hardy men. Thanks for the review and stars.
Comment from kahpot
A great story, as this was in old cowboy language, personally in the first stanza, last line I was expecting to read "it's good to you agin" maybe not (again) but really enjoyed the read, very well done****kahpot
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2019
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A great story, as this was in old cowboy language, personally in the first stanza, last line I was expecting to read "it's good to you agin" maybe not (again) but really enjoyed the read, very well done****kahpot
Comment Written 05-Aug-2019
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2019
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Thanks for the "Agin" made the change. Your review and five stars are appreciated.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This has an authentic-sounding cowboy voice to it. I am not going to suggest too many punctuation-fixes, since some dialect is going to have more casual punctuation anyway. Probably just with the sentence: "At this point, who gives a damn." I would put a question mark instead of the period. But of course since the cowboy is tired and on his last few days, it could stay a period because it is more of a rhetorical question. Very nice!
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2019
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This has an authentic-sounding cowboy voice to it. I am not going to suggest too many punctuation-fixes, since some dialect is going to have more casual punctuation anyway. Probably just with the sentence: "At this point, who gives a damn." I would put a question mark instead of the period. But of course since the cowboy is tired and on his last few days, it could stay a period because it is more of a rhetorical question. Very nice!
Comment Written 01-Aug-2019
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2019
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You are right, Cookie. I replaced the period with a question mark.
Thanka for the review and six stars, they are very much appreciated.
Comment from Six-Star Writer
I here a country song in here somewhere. Sorry, but I really like country music. I enjoyed your cowboy story. Was this autobiographical? Cowboys are cool.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2019
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I here a country song in here somewhere. Sorry, but I really like country music. I enjoyed your cowboy story. Was this autobiographical? Cowboys are cool.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your review and five stars. There's a little of my life in there. I've done everything in the poem but die, I'm hoping that won't happen any time soon.
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That reminds if some quote about dying. I don't know who said it, or the exact words, but I think it went something like "Dying is easy. It's living that's the hard part."
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Just looked it up. Apparently it was Alden Bell.
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And Edmund Kean said "Dying ia easy; comedy is hard." About 200 years before the proceeding quote.
Comment from robyn corum
Willie,
The old cowboys are gone, now. The ones we revered and looked up to so very much. Even the bad guys are history. ha! This was a fun one and I enjoyed!
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2019
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Willie,
The old cowboys are gone, now. The ones we revered and looked up to so very much. Even the bad guys are history. ha! This was a fun one and I enjoyed!
Comment Written 30-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2019
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Thank you, Robyn, the good days of the cowboy are gone. Sad!
Thank you for your review and five stars.
Comment from zanya
Yes and the cowboy 'language ' adds authenticity and zest to this poem with a story - the rhythm moves at a lively pace enhancing the tale of the cowboy's varied and vagrant lifestyle - a vignette of the life of a cowboy
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2019
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Yes and the cowboy 'language ' adds authenticity and zest to this poem with a story - the rhythm moves at a lively pace enhancing the tale of the cowboy's varied and vagrant lifestyle - a vignette of the life of a cowboy
Comment Written 30-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2019
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Thank you, for your very kind review and beautiful six stars.
Comment from Hugh McDowell
Excellent. I prefer non rhyming poetry but really enjoyed this. The poem flowed well and I loved the pace and sequence. You've captured the spirit of many old timers I have know in my life. I loved the mention of things done in a bygone era. Hugh
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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Excellent. I prefer non rhyming poetry but really enjoyed this. The poem flowed well and I loved the pace and sequence. You've captured the spirit of many old timers I have know in my life. I loved the mention of things done in a bygone era. Hugh
Comment Written 29-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your review ad stars. We are just the opposite when it comes to poetry. I prefer rhyme, however; good writing comes by, rhyme or not and I enjoy it.
Comment from Earl Corp
The last part reminded me of Kenny Rogers song the Gambler. This definitely should have been a contest entry. It rhymed, makes sense and it invokes emotions within the reader. Very nice job.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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The last part reminded me of Kenny Rogers song the Gambler. This definitely should have been a contest entry. It rhymed, makes sense and it invokes emotions within the reader. Very nice job.
Comment Written 29-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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Thank you for the great six-star review. It was entered in the story poem that is due in January.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
That sounds about par for a cowboy's life. It's usually once that they take a wife, but they need to roam so they work cattle, and Rodeo's and Wild west Shows. Any job to ride a horse. Well done Willie. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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That sounds about par for a cowboy's life. It's usually once that they take a wife, but they need to roam so they work cattle, and Rodeo's and Wild west Shows. Any job to ride a horse. Well done Willie. Nancy:)
Comment Written 29-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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I was a cowboy all my life. My marriage of 60 years worked out because my wife was into the same Genre. Thank you very much for your review and five stars.
Comment from dovemarie
Dear Willie, I can see you love the Old West. This was a good story in a poem, kind of sad,since it was the old cowboy's last visit, and the doctor knew it. Good luck in the contest. Dove
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
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reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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Dear Willie, I can see you love the Old West. This was a good story in a poem, kind of sad,since it was the old cowboy's last visit, and the doctor knew it. Good luck in the contest. Dove
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2019
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Thank you, Dove, for your review and five stars. I was a cowboy all my life until I got too old to ride.
