Requiem for Rudy
When the Price You Pay is Your Happiness40 total reviews
Comment from amada
I like the way you went straight into the story, Jay...you capture the reader's attention from the very start...that's one of rules of great writing. I followed your lines, each one exquisitively written. Best story of the month for me.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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I like the way you went straight into the story, Jay...you capture the reader's attention from the very start...that's one of rules of great writing. I followed your lines, each one exquisitively written. Best story of the month for me.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Ah, Amada, thanks so much for your kindness and stars.
Comment from muffinmama
The language, the imagery, the raw honesty of your story is superb.
We so desperately want to be the kind of people that would never complain about the Rudies in our life (animal or human), but at the back of the mind is the constant wail, "What about me? Why do I have to put up with this crap?"
I must admit that, apart from the excellent writing, the story touched me personally because we are suffering with a feline version of Rudy. She's sweet and gorgeous and refuses to accept that she's not ours. I would gladly adopt her but she seems to have an untreatable problem related to her urinary tract/bladder. She pees all over the place without being conscious of it. Not her fault, but why do I have to faint every time I walk into the laundry room? And boy is she expensive! Special food, meds, etc. But she has such pluck, and she's doing everything right to win our love and become an inside cat.
We also play the constant 'close the door before she runs in' game. Our poor dog now has to wait to be let out and in. I suppose I should be grateful that they love each other so there's no stress trying to keep them apart.
You deserve a medal!
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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The language, the imagery, the raw honesty of your story is superb.
We so desperately want to be the kind of people that would never complain about the Rudies in our life (animal or human), but at the back of the mind is the constant wail, "What about me? Why do I have to put up with this crap?"
I must admit that, apart from the excellent writing, the story touched me personally because we are suffering with a feline version of Rudy. She's sweet and gorgeous and refuses to accept that she's not ours. I would gladly adopt her but she seems to have an untreatable problem related to her urinary tract/bladder. She pees all over the place without being conscious of it. Not her fault, but why do I have to faint every time I walk into the laundry room? And boy is she expensive! Special food, meds, etc. But she has such pluck, and she's doing everything right to win our love and become an inside cat.
We also play the constant 'close the door before she runs in' game. Our poor dog now has to wait to be let out and in. I suppose I should be grateful that they love each other so there's no stress trying to keep them apart.
You deserve a medal!
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Lovely, lovely words, Ryma, and you show such compassion. How I wish his was a medical condition. His horrid breath was, but not his peeing all over the house. The six was a wonderful sight to behold.
Comment from RGstar
SIX STARS
I am so embarrassed my old friend I don't have the correct stars for this. Was it to be long or not, I didn't take my eyes of the page. Such the person I am, this is like bandaid sticking to my soul, resonating as close as could ever to my very being.
I nearly forgot what a fantastic writer you are.
This is one of the best stories I will read all year. If it was fiction, it would still win any competition. Coupled with the excess emotions from anybody living ( you would have to be dead not to be touched) this has the strength, the artistry, the compassion and reality of a 50 ton truck coming to stop on a bed of marshmallows.
I cannot give this enough praise.
Well done my friend, just can't give this piece of writing enough praise. I think I sound like a tape recorder.
I rate this will be the best Biographical story written this side of Christmas. Excellent. Proud of you old friend. Not only that. The writing is superb
Bravo.
Have a good day.
Thank you for making my day.
Best wishes.
RG
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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SIX STARS
I am so embarrassed my old friend I don't have the correct stars for this. Was it to be long or not, I didn't take my eyes of the page. Such the person I am, this is like bandaid sticking to my soul, resonating as close as could ever to my very being.
I nearly forgot what a fantastic writer you are.
This is one of the best stories I will read all year. If it was fiction, it would still win any competition. Coupled with the excess emotions from anybody living ( you would have to be dead not to be touched) this has the strength, the artistry, the compassion and reality of a 50 ton truck coming to stop on a bed of marshmallows.
I cannot give this enough praise.
Well done my friend, just can't give this piece of writing enough praise. I think I sound like a tape recorder.
I rate this will be the best Biographical story written this side of Christmas. Excellent. Proud of you old friend. Not only that. The writing is superb
Bravo.
Have a good day.
Thank you for making my day.
Best wishes.
RG
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Roy, you never need to apologize for not having a six when your encouraging words are the equivalent of a 7 or 8! Thank you, Sir!
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
I don't think I've ever read a horror story about a compassionate animal rescue before, but I think this might be it! Rudy's ending was certainly undignified and unceremonious, but not even a serious animal lover could condemn you, because the love you showed this poor creature during the sad and stinky portion of his lifetime that he spent with you, more than makes up for it. Yes, Rudy knew a love with you and your family that he had probably never experienced for many years (or ever before), and when you put Rudy in that dumpster, he was feeling no pain.
Here are some errors and suggestions:
Even the piss has dried in your minds and the floors, legs, and fabrics have been scrubbed and Fabreezed.
-->
Even the piss has dried in your minds and the floors, legs, and fabrics have been scrubbed and Febrezed.
Dr. French explained it easily enough. Rotted teeth, some of them below the gum line. Age, certainly, and owner neglect, probably.
-->
Dr. French explained it easily enough: rotted teeth, some of them below the gum line; age, certainly; and owner neglect, probably.
Surgery, at this point, expensive.
-->
Surgery, at this point, would be expensive.
(with a special nod to the Fabreeze commercials for the coinage)
-->
(with a special nod to the Febreze commercials for the coinage)
Every major in-home decision we made only after considering Rudy's impact on it.
-->
We made every major in-home decision, only after considering Rudy's impact on it.
...and sprayed out a fog of Fabreez to every corner of the room,
-->
...and sprayed out a fog of Febreze to every corner of the room,
***
I don't really know how it can be done, but I think that if you could put a second photo in with your story, it would be a bottle of Febreze.
The story is categorized as "General Fiction," but with the painfully detailed descriptions you have supplied, I don't believe that for a moment: this is definitely a true story!
You really showed so much compassion for Rudy. He really is rather cute, but of course, photos don't carry odors. I once met a woman whose breath could almost knock you out, and it sounds like she could be in a competition with Rudy -- only this lady didn't pee all over people's furniture, besides that. If there's even a smidgen of truth to the story of the Rainbow Bridge, I know Rudy will be waiting for you there, somewhere in the vicinity of the Pearly Gates. (And I have a feeling you'll be entering the Pearly Gates, because you know the Lord, who came out of the sepulcher-- the one where the stone was rolled away.) And there, Rudy will cover you with doggy kisses, and they will be sweet ones. You really went far beyond the extra mile in caring for a poor, unloved, abandoned dog! Seriously, God bless you, Jay, for what you did. God bless you, and Roseana, and your children. Seriously.
And... your story gives a whole new meaning to the term, "dog breath"!
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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I don't think I've ever read a horror story about a compassionate animal rescue before, but I think this might be it! Rudy's ending was certainly undignified and unceremonious, but not even a serious animal lover could condemn you, because the love you showed this poor creature during the sad and stinky portion of his lifetime that he spent with you, more than makes up for it. Yes, Rudy knew a love with you and your family that he had probably never experienced for many years (or ever before), and when you put Rudy in that dumpster, he was feeling no pain.
Here are some errors and suggestions:
Even the piss has dried in your minds and the floors, legs, and fabrics have been scrubbed and Fabreezed.
-->
Even the piss has dried in your minds and the floors, legs, and fabrics have been scrubbed and Febrezed.
Dr. French explained it easily enough. Rotted teeth, some of them below the gum line. Age, certainly, and owner neglect, probably.
-->
Dr. French explained it easily enough: rotted teeth, some of them below the gum line; age, certainly; and owner neglect, probably.
Surgery, at this point, expensive.
-->
Surgery, at this point, would be expensive.
(with a special nod to the Fabreeze commercials for the coinage)
-->
(with a special nod to the Febreze commercials for the coinage)
Every major in-home decision we made only after considering Rudy's impact on it.
-->
We made every major in-home decision, only after considering Rudy's impact on it.
...and sprayed out a fog of Fabreez to every corner of the room,
-->
...and sprayed out a fog of Febreze to every corner of the room,
***
I don't really know how it can be done, but I think that if you could put a second photo in with your story, it would be a bottle of Febreze.
The story is categorized as "General Fiction," but with the painfully detailed descriptions you have supplied, I don't believe that for a moment: this is definitely a true story!
You really showed so much compassion for Rudy. He really is rather cute, but of course, photos don't carry odors. I once met a woman whose breath could almost knock you out, and it sounds like she could be in a competition with Rudy -- only this lady didn't pee all over people's furniture, besides that. If there's even a smidgen of truth to the story of the Rainbow Bridge, I know Rudy will be waiting for you there, somewhere in the vicinity of the Pearly Gates. (And I have a feeling you'll be entering the Pearly Gates, because you know the Lord, who came out of the sepulcher-- the one where the stone was rolled away.) And there, Rudy will cover you with doggy kisses, and they will be sweet ones. You really went far beyond the extra mile in caring for a poor, unloved, abandoned dog! Seriously, God bless you, Jay, for what you did. God bless you, and Roseana, and your children. Seriously.
And... your story gives a whole new meaning to the term, "dog breath"!
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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You are amazing, Mary Kay. And compassionate. Your understanding of our predicament warmed my heart. Few have truly empathized as you have.
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What a kind response, Jay! Whatever compassion I have is there because of God's grace. I could honestly feel empathy for what you and your family experienced, and the terrible dilemma of caring for Rudy, at the expense of your own comfort.
I was trying to remember the Bible verses that came to my mind as I pondered that situation. I don't know if I can remember them all, but here are some. God's Word is so good for our souls!
21 Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:
22 Because of the Lord?s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:21-23 NIV
And this touched my heart:
Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your justice like the ocean depths. You care for people and animals alike, O Lord.
Psalms 36:6 NLT
So at least you can rest with an easy conscience that in the matter of little Rudy, you did right by a helpless creature of God.
I wish we (my husband and I) could have a dog right now, but for various reasons, it's not a good idea. Maybe we will have another one, in the future. Most of them have the sweetest personalities, and return a lot of the love they're given -- sometimes more!
May God bless you in abundance!
- Mary Kay
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Thank you for blessing me with God's word, Mary Kay. You are a kind, sweet soul.
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You're so very welcome. I'm blessed to know you, too.
Comment from Wendy G
A very well written story, and yes, I had all the feelings you imagined your reader would have had. Poor dear Rudy. No I wouldn't have coped with such a dog at all, and yes, I would have felt guilty about not being able to love him as he deserved. Great writing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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A very well written story, and yes, I had all the feelings you imagined your reader would have had. Poor dear Rudy. No I wouldn't have coped with such a dog at all, and yes, I would have felt guilty about not being able to love him as he deserved. Great writing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Wendy, thank you so much. Your words of understanding I hold close to my heart.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This is so sad. Reading it I thought it was non-fiction. That's the way it came across, and very well written. But you have labelled it as General Fiction, so I am left wondering. If it really is fiction, your mind works strangely.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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This is so sad. Reading it I thought it was non-fiction. That's the way it came across, and very well written. But you have labelled it as General Fiction, so I am left wondering. If it really is fiction, your mind works strangely.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Oh my God, Katherine, thank you for the heads up. It was definitely non-fiction. I changed the other category to biographical while I was at it. Thank you for your kind words about the quality of writing. I appreciate that.
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Please can you educate me. What is a heads up. As a Brit I don't understand this term... Thanks in advance. Katherine
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"Heads up" means "to alert someone," "to prepare them for something."
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Thanks
Comment from karenina
You cantankerous (soft-hearted), curmudgeon of mangy furballs that scream that with their addition to the family...(wait for it)..."URINE LUCK!"
For anyone who has endured the confounding devastation of unintended heart-swell...
For the "push me/pull you" of unconditional stew, made with equal parts revulsion and (dag nab it!) compulsion to redeem all inhumanity for a scoundrel like Rudy...
You expose the underbelly of his (may they rot on hell) former owners, while not succumbing to the urge to paint yourself as kin to Saint Francis!
Rudy (like life), did all he could to test your limits. The moment he cowered at your impending swat you saw your reflection, you knew who you could become.
No sappy prose. No puppy love. Just the most moving prose ever...
Your honesty is raw. Real. I've got a thing for Rudy. He grows on you...
The harder it is to give love, the sadder it is to say goodbye.
I would have stopped my car too. That cardboard needed to cover him...
He'd be growing cold soon...
Superlative write!
Karenina
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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You cantankerous (soft-hearted), curmudgeon of mangy furballs that scream that with their addition to the family...(wait for it)..."URINE LUCK!"
For anyone who has endured the confounding devastation of unintended heart-swell...
For the "push me/pull you" of unconditional stew, made with equal parts revulsion and (dag nab it!) compulsion to redeem all inhumanity for a scoundrel like Rudy...
You expose the underbelly of his (may they rot on hell) former owners, while not succumbing to the urge to paint yourself as kin to Saint Francis!
Rudy (like life), did all he could to test your limits. The moment he cowered at your impending swat you saw your reflection, you knew who you could become.
No sappy prose. No puppy love. Just the most moving prose ever...
Your honesty is raw. Real. I've got a thing for Rudy. He grows on you...
The harder it is to give love, the sadder it is to say goodbye.
I would have stopped my car too. That cardboard needed to cover him...
He'd be growing cold soon...
Superlative write!
Karenina
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Bless you, Saint Karenina! To you, I'll tell the truth--to the rest I let the lie hang. I did not bring him home to bury, as some assumed. But I did not leave him on top of the cardboard. In a few more hours the street people would begin to populate that alleyway. Also, it was in clear view of the police, driving by the side street.
The cops would be suspicious, thinking it a discarded infant. The street people would be needy, thinking they might use that beach towel. In either case, Rudy would be exposed, and the disappointed exposers would leave him there.
Ergo, I pulled away some of the upper layers of cardboard, finding an open space along the side. I remember it feeling warm there. I slipped Rudy down the side and replaced the cardboard on the top.
A burial of sorts. No?
Thank you so much for the six stars.
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I knew it! I said that! I'd have placed him beneath the cardboard too... He was soon to be very cold...
Comment from Sanku
What a story .What come to mind most of all is the extreme patience and warmth you showed that poor doggie. And that your family was also with you in that. fantastic and superbly written
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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What a story .What come to mind most of all is the extreme patience and warmth you showed that poor doggie. And that your family was also with you in that. fantastic and superbly written
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Sanku, you are so kind to have given me a six on top of your kind, kind words. Thank you.
Jay
Comment from L. Kalere
Are we ever going to find out what happened to Rudy's body??? I'd like to think you buried him? I can't stand the suspense Jay. By the way, how do you make everything you write so darn compelling? Great job, you could make a dictionary interesting. RIP Rudy
It's yet another six...
Linda
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Are we ever going to find out what happened to Rudy's body??? I'd like to think you buried him? I can't stand the suspense Jay. By the way, how do you make everything you write so darn compelling? Great job, you could make a dictionary interesting. RIP Rudy
It's yet another six...
Linda
Comment Written 03-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2021
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Doggone it, Linda. You know I'd love to tell you what happened to Rudy's body. Especially if I'd made a courageous decision. This was a terribly difficult ending to write. I think the real answer is in there. Meanwhile, you are so kind to have given me a six on this piece. Thank you, Linda.
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
SSSSSStunning! The finest dog story ever--nary a warm-n-cuddly moment or insipid sentiment. Cheerssssss. LIZ
doner=>donor
Fabreez=>Febreeze
[sugg: omit dead and] decomposing
tule=>tulle
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2021
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SSSSSStunning! The finest dog story ever--nary a warm-n-cuddly moment or insipid sentiment. Cheerssssss. LIZ
doner=>donor
Fabreez=>Febreeze
[sugg: omit dead and] decomposing
tule=>tulle
Comment Written 02-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2021
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As my friend Elizabeth says, sup-puh-puh-puh-perb review. Made your suggested changes. I always confuse donor with the synonym for erection, hence the -er. Corrected the Febreeze and the rookie mistake of over describing a decomposing critter. Tule, describing the fog in the San Joaquin Valley, is correct according to all Google searches I tried.
Liz, you da bomb!
Jay
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Brilliant piece.
Tule is a large bulrush that is abundant in marshy areas of California.
I assumed you meant tulle:
a soft, fine silk, cotton, or nylon material like net, used for making veils and dresses.
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I don't know about no veils. That's a girly thing. I never had much reason to spell tule, but I'll tell you, it is a force to reckon with.