I Am a Writer
a little understanding33 total reviews
Comment from boxergirl
Great job with your commentary about being a writer. I could connect with a lot of what you were saying, especially how your family and friends don't share your enthusiasm for your writing. I also agree that it doesn't really matter. I get joy and satisfaction just for putting it all together. 8-)
reply by the author on 01-May-2014
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Great job with your commentary about being a writer. I could connect with a lot of what you were saying, especially how your family and friends don't share your enthusiasm for your writing. I also agree that it doesn't really matter. I get joy and satisfaction just for putting it all together. 8-)
Comment Written 01-May-2014
reply by the author on 01-May-2014
I knew long ago that you were a 'lifer,' a writer that was purging and examining her world. Thanks for sharing my moment.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
That family doesn't appreciate a member's interest or skill beyond benign acknowledgement is unfortunate. But active obstructionism is entirely unacceptable unless the obstructing party is under 5 years old. If affection doesn't spur better behavior than that, common courtesy should. As for the dog issue? Obviously Rover is filling a need the other party isn't meeting. My advice? If you can't fill the need, be grateful it only takes a dog. :D Nancy
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reply by the author on 01-May-2014
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That family doesn't appreciate a member's interest or skill beyond benign acknowledgement is unfortunate. But active obstructionism is entirely unacceptable unless the obstructing party is under 5 years old. If affection doesn't spur better behavior than that, common courtesy should. As for the dog issue? Obviously Rover is filling a need the other party isn't meeting. My advice? If you can't fill the need, be grateful it only takes a dog. :D Nancy
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Comment Written 01-May-2014
reply by the author on 01-May-2014
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And of course, this was for general consumption, but specifically for the writer who finds her voice, my response to her would be--Congratulations.
Many people easily diminish their own light to make room for the sun. The writer denies her own fuel and uses it to promote the fire of her family.
When she discovers the light switch, she is often meant to feel shame. Rarely do the moths realize she is damned and determined to reach the light and is willing to die in the process.
They want her to glow at their acceptable wattage.
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You're right. We're a weird bunch - writing is a compulsion. That's why we congregate. Few others understand. And late bloomers are already catagorized. How dare they step outside their assigned function. Great job, Ingrid. :) nancy
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I took Alexis for a hearing test yesterday, a frustrated result of her father's inability to get her to listen. Right before the actual appointment I hissed in her ear. "You better pray there's something wrong with you ears, little girl, because if you pass the medical, Grandma will know you're NOT LISTENING! Yes, I screamed that at her, and she heard me, even when I was whispering.
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When my kids were in elementary school they picked up their dad's habit of mumbling and talking to me while walking away. Everyone decided I had a problem, so I went to an audiologist who confirmed what I already knew - my hearing was excellent. People will play with you any way they can to get what they want. To Alexis: Nice try, kid! :D N
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You bet! Ain't working, and I will not allow her to have a lifetime of indifference.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
I recently wrote a very similar piece, Are Writer's Dismissive (239 words). Yes, non-writers don't care and can be cruel--I have a great example if you read my piece. It is very short. My mother still hasn't read the ten poems I gave her 3 years ago. I think this is a common experience. Well written, my friend~Debbie
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reply by the author on 01-May-2014
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I recently wrote a very similar piece, Are Writer's Dismissive (239 words). Yes, non-writers don't care and can be cruel--I have a great example if you read my piece. It is very short. My mother still hasn't read the ten poems I gave her 3 years ago. I think this is a common experience. Well written, my friend~Debbie
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Comment Written 01-May-2014
reply by the author on 01-May-2014
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What I didn't get into in this essay is the subliminal nuances of relationships in dealing with a family member's writing. "Are they writing about me?" "What are they saying?" "Are they dredging up history?"
You bet we are. You mother's refusal to read your poems--PRESENTED TO HER--is a statement about her indifference. And I'm really sorry, for you and especially for her. She can laud her childbirth agony all over the map, but if a child brings home a feather, thinking it a gift, and the mother trashes the emotional attachment to thinking about her, then unfortunately she's a birth mother--but no Madonna.
Thanks for reading. I get it.
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I am glad I have other supportive people around me, many of who are writers. FS is such a wonderful place to get support in both writing and life. I have never been close to my family of origin and have learned to accept it. I can wish my family cared, but in reality, I know they just don't have the capacity to do so. Take care~Debbie
