Tiny Tales of Terror
Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Holy Smoke"Multi-authored book of flash/micro horror fiction
51 total reviews
Comment from livelylinda
Author: I love those surprise endings! Where this story began is not where I thought it would end. Angry Jimmy sent the priest to hell . . . creative, original, entertaining in so few words. Good contest contender. livelylinda
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Author: I love those surprise endings! Where this story began is not where I thought it would end. Angry Jimmy sent the priest to hell . . . creative, original, entertaining in so few words. Good contest contender. livelylinda
Comment Written 01-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Well, according to the voters it isn't much of a contender, Linda, but I'm so very happy to know that you think so.
Thanks for your comments, and encouragement as well.
Comment from jpduck
This struck me as a very strange story, even by 'hundred-word' standards. But one thing puzzled me. The implication seemed to be that Jimmy handcuffed the priest to the confessional and set fire to the church as revenge for the priest pronouncing forgiveness too readily. This almost tipped the story over from the strange to the utterly bizarre.
Adrian
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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This struck me as a very strange story, even by 'hundred-word' standards. But one thing puzzled me. The implication seemed to be that Jimmy handcuffed the priest to the confessional and set fire to the church as revenge for the priest pronouncing forgiveness too readily. This almost tipped the story over from the strange to the utterly bizarre.
Adrian
Comment Written 01-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Yes sir, Adrian. That is precisely what Jimmy did. Of course, the priest was sleeping with Jimmy's wife, and he knew as soon as Jimmy walked in who he was. Probably from family photographs on Jimmy's bedside table. What the priest didn't know, however, was that Jimmy knew he'd been banging his old lady. I guess he found out. The hard way...
Thank you very much for your comments.
Comment from Linda Engel
Ah, again the Catholic church shows its colors. So many women attracted to the priest, wanting that forbidden sin. Satan steps in and maneuvers the whole situation. The priest knew. The husband knew. And knowing you, Dean , the wife is probably dead somewhere in the basement. Great story, Dean, I'd not be surprised if this doesn't happen more often then we hear about, the affair not the fire.
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Ah, again the Catholic church shows its colors. So many women attracted to the priest, wanting that forbidden sin. Satan steps in and maneuvers the whole situation. The priest knew. The husband knew. And knowing you, Dean , the wife is probably dead somewhere in the basement. Great story, Dean, I'd not be surprised if this doesn't happen more often then we hear about, the affair not the fire.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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I wouldn't be a bit surprised either, Linda. But, how on earth did you know it was me who wrote this? This is a blind contest, isn't it? I even abstained from using animations (although I had a perfect one lined up and ready to go!), or fancy frills and such. Just a picture, and the story. So tell me, how did you know?
Just curious...
Thanks very much for your encouraging review. I needed a bit of encouragement for this one... ~Anon 4 Now
Comment from tfawcus
It seems that the clergy have been in the news a lot recently - at least, here in Australia. Celibacy leads to some bizarre results. I guess this short story might also have been titled "Holy Smoke!"
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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It seems that the clergy have been in the news a lot recently - at least, here in Australia. Celibacy leads to some bizarre results. I guess this short story might also have been titled "Holy Smoke!"
Comment Written 01-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Ha,ha, Yeah, and don't think I didn't think about that very title a time or two, Tony. But, I was afraid it might be perceived as being just a bit too campy, given the nature of the story.
Thanks for the funny comments, and for taking the time to review the damn thing in the first place.
I do appreciate it. :)
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
This was really good for a 100 word story.
A very tight story on sin, betrayal, adultery, revenge, Karma and arson.
Good tension and great plotting. A proper story.
Very good work
GMG
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Hi there,
This was really good for a 100 word story.
A very tight story on sin, betrayal, adultery, revenge, Karma and arson.
Good tension and great plotting. A proper story.
Very good work
GMG
Comment Written 01-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Thank you very much for reading it, first and foremost, giraffmang, but also for your intelligent comments and six star rating as well. All are sincerely appreciated, kind sir.
Comment from His Grayness
Wow...chilling, to say the least. The power of imagination here and the grip of the reader in this scenario is compelling. The challenge of cramming a truly stunning emotion in so few words is daunting but the writer here should be smiling in success! HIS GRAYNESS; Vance
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Wow...chilling, to say the least. The power of imagination here and the grip of the reader in this scenario is compelling. The challenge of cramming a truly stunning emotion in so few words is daunting but the writer here should be smiling in success! HIS GRAYNESS; Vance
Comment Written 01-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2015
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Well, I would be, Vance, but ...
Thanks so much for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed it at least.
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Oh, damn..how did that sixth star slip beneath the golden shovel of delivery! perhaps it was absent at the bus station of intention! Vance
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It happens to be too, Vance, LOL, all of the time. No worries... ;)
Comment from happykat4
Very good. A priest who broke his vows to God, a man who broke one of God's commandments. With a payback that was not quick, but long and painful, both physically and mentally. Good luck in the contest. It's good!
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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Very good. A priest who broke his vows to God, a man who broke one of God's commandments. With a payback that was not quick, but long and painful, both physically and mentally. Good luck in the contest. It's good!
Comment Written 31-May-2015
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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Thanks, Happykat. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from petalangela
Hmm a double take a second read. Nothing is safe anymore not even our faith in god and the priests
So delightfully off best I enjoyed this tremendously hope it is fiction ......
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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Hmm a double take a second read. Nothing is safe anymore not even our faith in god and the priests
So delightfully off best I enjoyed this tremendously hope it is fiction ......
Comment Written 31-May-2015
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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Well, in my case it's fiction, but I'm sure it's probably happened a time or two. Purely speculation on my part, I assure you, Petal. Thanks very much for your comments.
Comment from Cindy Warren
Did the preist know who Jimmy was when he forgave him? I think that's what the gulp was about, but I could be wrong. Love the irony here. He forgives Jimmy just before Jimmy kills him. Wonder if the horny priest has more fires in his future. LOL
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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Did the preist know who Jimmy was when he forgave him? I think that's what the gulp was about, but I could be wrong. Love the irony here. He forgives Jimmy just before Jimmy kills him. Wonder if the horny priest has more fires in his future. LOL
Comment Written 31-May-2015
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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I would say he most assuredly does. And yes, the implication is the priest knew exactly who Jimmy was. He just didn't know that Jimmy knew about him. I guess he found out the hard way though, heh-heh.
Thanks so much for the kind comments and encouraging review. It is appreciated, Cindy...
Comment from Michaelk
The ultimate revenge to be condemned in the same place that he had absolved so many people. I wonder if he absolved himself as he was being immolated.
Well written. I could feel the anger of Jimmy through your writing.
Great job for only 100 words.
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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The ultimate revenge to be condemned in the same place that he had absolved so many people. I wonder if he absolved himself as he was being immolated.
Well written. I could feel the anger of Jimmy through your writing.
Great job for only 100 words.
Comment Written 31-May-2015
reply by the author on 31-May-2015
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Thanks, Michael, I appreciate that.
Generally speaking, stories of this nature -- meaning the one hundred word variety -- about revenge and retribution usually don't do very well in these contests. People much prefer the happy. "feel good" stuff. But, that's okay because horror stories are what I do best, and I'm not much for the touchy, feely stuff. Thanks so much again for your encouraging review.
