Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Aspirations"A book of Poetry & Writing
94 total reviews
Comment from IanC
This is a wonderfully written poem. It must be read several times to get all you are saying. I think your words are important enough to ponder. I like when a poem stirs up so much to think about.
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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This is a wonderfully written poem. It must be read several times to get all you are saying. I think your words are important enough to ponder. I like when a poem stirs up so much to think about.
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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thank you Ian for reading
Comment from Shirley McLain
Very good poem. It flowed well, did not seem forced and was easy to read. I liked the stroy your poem portrayed. You wrote well and I did not find any spag.
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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Very good poem. It flowed well, did not seem forced and was easy to read. I liked the stroy your poem portrayed. You wrote well and I did not find any spag.
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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thank you Tex have a good week GW
Comment from connied
Very strong--asks some hard questions:
Would he stand as stone on principles
Or bend to the ever moving passage of age
and you close with another strong point:
With the conflict of never finding peace,
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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Very strong--asks some hard questions:
Would he stand as stone on principles
Or bend to the ever moving passage of age
and you close with another strong point:
With the conflict of never finding peace,
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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thank you connied
Comment from Valkarie
I like this because... Your poem flows so well is concise and powerful with a visual aspect to it. Your piece has a good balance and is very inspiring with a good tone which captures the tension of the piece in its entirety. An artistic write with an emotional feel and complexity that has an artistic expression.
Valkarie...
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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I like this because... Your poem flows so well is concise and powerful with a visual aspect to it. Your piece has a good balance and is very inspiring with a good tone which captures the tension of the piece in its entirety. An artistic write with an emotional feel and complexity that has an artistic expression.
Valkarie...
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you valkarie
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No problem it was my pleasure.
V...
Comment from Penpal
This is a very powerful poem which points out questions that we face in life. I espcially like the last line which shows if wrong choices are made, there will be no peace of mind. NIcely done
Pen
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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This is a very powerful poem which points out questions that we face in life. I espcially like the last line which shows if wrong choices are made, there will be no peace of mind. NIcely done
Pen
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you penpal
Comment from Joan E.
I admired your picture choice to illustrate your words--I assume it is of you and your father. I enjoyed your use of questions to draw us into your reflections. I also especially liked your "stone" simile.
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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I admired your picture choice to illustrate your words--I assume it is of you and your father. I enjoyed your use of questions to draw us into your reflections. I also especially liked your "stone" simile.
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you joan for reading
Comment from Alexander E Poet
I thought this was a great, I've found that statements to be accurate and true, I thought this was passion heartfelt in a very meaningful piece I thought it flows nicely and makes a very meaningful piece of work to be recognized. No errors no mistakes Alexander
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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I thought this was a great, I've found that statements to be accurate and true, I thought this was passion heartfelt in a very meaningful piece I thought it flows nicely and makes a very meaningful piece of work to be recognized. No errors no mistakes Alexander
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you QQ this was nice coming from someone like you GW
Comment from Bryana
I find this poem delightful
as well as the picture. They
both show the ever moving passage
of time. It was a pleasure reading it.
Have a wonderful weekend.
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
|
I find this poem delightful
as well as the picture. They
both show the ever moving passage
of time. It was a pleasure reading it.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you Bryana for reading
Comment from rudywalsh
Well done G W, your best piece yet, very captivating, very cleverly thought-out, you must be quite a smart man to put all this together and it all make sense.
It truley is a wonderful write from yourself.
I do believe we will find piece, it's our calling as spirits to find piece, once we find understanding and know everything then life will continue on an even keel.
It's called evolving, we have a long way to go yet.
Thanks for a very thought provoking read, keep up the great work. Rudy.
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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Well done G W, your best piece yet, very captivating, very cleverly thought-out, you must be quite a smart man to put all this together and it all make sense.
It truley is a wonderful write from yourself.
I do believe we will find piece, it's our calling as spirits to find piece, once we find understanding and know everything then life will continue on an even keel.
It's called evolving, we have a long way to go yet.
Thanks for a very thought provoking read, keep up the great work. Rudy.
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you Rudy for reading this have a grate weekend GW
Comment from Amicus
This is a thought provoking poem, deepwater. I like the first part of it with the rhetorical questions that pull the reader right into the narrator's thinking process. And you have some nice phrases--this soul of a man...will he stand as stone on principles...the ever moving passage of age--all are original and well turned phrases. The poem IMHO gets lost mid way through when suddenly there is no punctuation to guide the reader and make the questions stand out. There are also several awkward phrases and incorrect pronoun usage--what outcome can benefit is a strange phrase...how do outcomes benefit...don't people benefit or not benefit from outcomes? ...the aspirations of what can be achieved is also strange to me, don't people have aspirations and achieve them or not? you seem very vague and wordy here...and the idiom is understanding of not understanding to as you phrase it in this poem.. isn't it? And finally, isn't the idiom under the premise that not under the premise of as you state it? Some tightening and polishing of language would make this a much better reflective piece IMHO.
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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This is a thought provoking poem, deepwater. I like the first part of it with the rhetorical questions that pull the reader right into the narrator's thinking process. And you have some nice phrases--this soul of a man...will he stand as stone on principles...the ever moving passage of age--all are original and well turned phrases. The poem IMHO gets lost mid way through when suddenly there is no punctuation to guide the reader and make the questions stand out. There are also several awkward phrases and incorrect pronoun usage--what outcome can benefit is a strange phrase...how do outcomes benefit...don't people benefit or not benefit from outcomes? ...the aspirations of what can be achieved is also strange to me, don't people have aspirations and achieve them or not? you seem very vague and wordy here...and the idiom is understanding of not understanding to as you phrase it in this poem.. isn't it? And finally, isn't the idiom under the premise that not under the premise of as you state it? Some tightening and polishing of language would make this a much better reflective piece IMHO.
Comment Written 15-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you for your comments IMHO
