Tiny Tales of Terror
Viewing comments for Chapter 37 "The Attic Door"Multi-authored book of flash/micro horror fiction
63 total reviews
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Dean why did you end your attic horror story with such n abrupt ending.
I wish you right another chapter to see what happens when the dad turn around to see the terror in the mirror.
Gert
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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Hello Dean why did you end your attic horror story with such n abrupt ending.
I wish you right another chapter to see what happens when the dad turn around to see the terror in the mirror.
Gert
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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Thanks, Gert. I do that quite a bit in flash and micro fiction, especially those written in the horror genre. I've found that if you leave the ending open to interpretation just a bit, the story will usually do much better. Besdies, the things our imaginations can conjure up are far more terrifying than the written word could ever hope to be.
Thanks for the sixer and the wonderful review.
~Dean :)
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You are welcome Dean
Sounds like a good plan.
Gert
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I have a question Dean
How do you get more then one picture in your writings? Or is it your secret?
Gert
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Not really a secret. I've taught several here how to do the same thing. I'll send a message to your inbox explaining how to do it.
~Dean
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Thank you very much Dean
Gert
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No sweat. :}
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Dean,
Way to set the atmosphere in this creepy little piece.
Silence is golden, eh? or in this case likely to end up claret red!
Nice one
G
chance to check it out.- needs closing speech marks.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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Hi Dean,
Way to set the atmosphere in this creepy little piece.
Silence is golden, eh? or in this case likely to end up claret red!
Nice one
G
chance to check it out.- needs closing speech marks.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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Thanks, G-Man. I have corrected the error, and thank you for pointing it out.
Much obliged for the review.
~Dean
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
I was just saying to Colin recently that
I don't like attics or cellars - creepy -
just as this was, Dean- poor kid.
Tonight the door flew open hitting the wall with such force, it jolted me awake.
Tonight, the door flew open, hitting the wall with such force it jolted me awake.
In the flashes of lightning I watch(,) horrified as an old standing
a chance to check it out.(")
Margaret
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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I was just saying to Colin recently that
I don't like attics or cellars - creepy -
just as this was, Dean- poor kid.
Tonight the door flew open hitting the wall with such force, it jolted me awake.
Tonight, the door flew open, hitting the wall with such force it jolted me awake.
In the flashes of lightning I watch(,) horrified as an old standing
a chance to check it out.(")
Margaret
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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Thanks, Margaret. That is a coincidence. A rather creepy one!
I very much appreciate your review. :}
~Dean
Comment from Just2Write
My night lite takes over[,] bathing (add comma)
I haven't had a chance to check it out.["] (close quote)
Another perfectly horrible tale, brilliantly written. Poor kid - Dear old dad was about to become one of the house's permanent population of ghosties.
My Grandmother's house had a weird set of cupboard doors in the attic that allowed access to the area under the rafters. I was terrified to look into those spaces. Even playing hide-and-seek - I would never go in there. Rose
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My night lite takes over[,] bathing (add comma)
I haven't had a chance to check it out.["] (close quote)
Another perfectly horrible tale, brilliantly written. Poor kid - Dear old dad was about to become one of the house's permanent population of ghosties.
My Grandmother's house had a weird set of cupboard doors in the attic that allowed access to the area under the rafters. I was terrified to look into those spaces. Even playing hide-and-seek - I would never go in there. Rose
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
Comment from Louise Michelle
Hey Dean,
Writing this in present tense really keeps us in the moment from beginning to end.
I'm thinking something she got from the attic attracted the ghoul. Also, I'm thinking it had something to do with her father having a questionable past.
Okay, I just gave it another read through. The father might have killed a little girl who has come back to have her revenge. Way to go, girl.
Your notes are cracking me up. Talk about some comic relief!
Do you have time to tell me about Parsons' story? I'm intrigued.
Hugs,
Lou
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Hey Dean,
Writing this in present tense really keeps us in the moment from beginning to end.
I'm thinking something she got from the attic attracted the ghoul. Also, I'm thinking it had something to do with her father having a questionable past.
Okay, I just gave it another read through. The father might have killed a little girl who has come back to have her revenge. Way to go, girl.
Your notes are cracking me up. Talk about some comic relief!
Do you have time to tell me about Parsons' story? I'm intrigued.
Hugs,
Lou
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
Comment from MissMerri
I enjoyed this tiny terror tale very much. I thought this was incredibly creative and imaginative and as always, with your work, well edited. I wished, when I discovered that Jerry was just a young boy, that I'd known that fact from the beginning. I was seeing him as the home owner at first. The picture was helpful, of course but I didn't see it until I got there. Maybe a line in the early paragraphs indicating his parents had just purchased the house or anything that would hint of his age would be helpful. It was spooky and terrifying and wonderfully written. I'm thoroughly scared. ð??³
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I enjoyed this tiny terror tale very much. I thought this was incredibly creative and imaginative and as always, with your work, well edited. I wished, when I discovered that Jerry was just a young boy, that I'd known that fact from the beginning. I was seeing him as the home owner at first. The picture was helpful, of course but I didn't see it until I got there. Maybe a line in the early paragraphs indicating his parents had just purchased the house or anything that would hint of his age would be helpful. It was spooky and terrifying and wonderfully written. I'm thoroughly scared. ð??³
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
Comment from Ulla
Very good. Poor lad too frighten to warn his Dad and now you have made him an orphan maybe, or a wee boy without his father. Oh dear, where is it all going? I enjoyed. Ulla
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2015
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Very good. Poor lad too frighten to warn his Dad and now you have made him an orphan maybe, or a wee boy without his father. Oh dear, where is it all going? I enjoyed. Ulla
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2015
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Thank you, Ulla. And I enjoyed your kind and thoughtful comments, my friend.
Much obliged!
~Dean :)
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Dean, you've done it again. Another awesome tiny tale of horror. I wish it was longer but then it wouldn't be tiny. Good job!
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Dean, you've done it again. Another awesome tiny tale of horror. I wish it was longer but then it wouldn't be tiny. Good job!
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
Comment from Ginnygray
Definitely a nightmarish story, Dean! This is very well written, with a lot of suspense, and surprises along the way! The whole encounter with the mirror showing up and the bloodied, tattered girl behind it gave me goosebumps! When the nightlight went out was another cause for anxiety! You have such a great descriptive choice of words that really makes the reader feel as though they are really present in this nightmare! I particularly like "the elongated, finger-like shadows of trees dance across my wall, creep across the floor, then perch like hungry vultures above me!". At the end you conclude with an alliteration "malicious, malevolent smile" just before you add a powerful clincher to the story, "the one reaching for his neck"! Just when we think we are ending this frightful tale, you manage to add this sentence which makes the reader want to read more of this story to see what happens! You are so very talented and can make a story so real and vivid! Great job, Dean!
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Definitely a nightmarish story, Dean! This is very well written, with a lot of suspense, and surprises along the way! The whole encounter with the mirror showing up and the bloodied, tattered girl behind it gave me goosebumps! When the nightlight went out was another cause for anxiety! You have such a great descriptive choice of words that really makes the reader feel as though they are really present in this nightmare! I particularly like "the elongated, finger-like shadows of trees dance across my wall, creep across the floor, then perch like hungry vultures above me!". At the end you conclude with an alliteration "malicious, malevolent smile" just before you add a powerful clincher to the story, "the one reaching for his neck"! Just when we think we are ending this frightful tale, you manage to add this sentence which makes the reader want to read more of this story to see what happens! You are so very talented and can make a story so real and vivid! Great job, Dean!
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
Comment from w.j.debi
Old houses have such charms, don't they? Who knows what lurks in the closet or attic or any other part of the house. I am considering buying a house, but maybe I'll have to check out why it is for sale first.
Great story, Dean. You know how to make a frightening tale out of the most innocent of things. Love the special effects.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Old houses have such charms, don't they? Who knows what lurks in the closet or attic or any other part of the house. I am considering buying a house, but maybe I'll have to check out why it is for sale first.
Great story, Dean. You know how to make a frightening tale out of the most innocent of things. Love the special effects.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Just check the attic first, or the basement, if it has one, debi. If all seems quiet (no moans, groans or otherwise), and there are no freshly heaped mounds of dirt on the basement floor, you're probably gonna be alright. But hey...you never know, heh-heh.
Thanks so much for the review!
~Dean
