Over-the-Fence
a whimsical tale with a moral74 total reviews
Comment from Joan E.
Even without your notes, it's easy to pick up on this tale of gossip and its moral. I really enjoyed the names you chose for the neighbors. I liked the moment of realization, when she is saddened to think that her neighbors would judge her too. And then the coup de grace with your great twist about her "husky" friend.
And, all of this done in rhyme.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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Even without your notes, it's easy to pick up on this tale of gossip and its moral. I really enjoyed the names you chose for the neighbors. I liked the moment of realization, when she is saddened to think that her neighbors would judge her too. And then the coup de grace with your great twist about her "husky" friend.
And, all of this done in rhyme.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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Joan E, thank you so much for such a great review and wonderful comments. I am glad you enjoyed.This was so much fun to write..jlsavell
Comment from Dave M
Jimi,
This is an excellent story in a poem. But you never said your newfound companion kept you breathless IN THE SACK. Ms. Spin elaborated on that one.
I enjoyed this read, although I found one tiny nit:
"while Snoops [Snoop's] wife Blather was seen with Mr. Moore at the Inn"
Dave M
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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Jimi,
This is an excellent story in a poem. But you never said your newfound companion kept you breathless IN THE SACK. Ms. Spin elaborated on that one.
I enjoyed this read, although I found one tiny nit:
"while Snoops [Snoop's] wife Blather was seen with Mr. Moore at the Inn"
Dave M
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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Dave M, my wonderful editor. One of these days I am going to release a poem and you are not going to find any nits..lol..you are the best..thank you so much..What would I do without you????? jimi
Comment from marilyn2
My goodness how does one get the time to write poetry when there is so much gossip going on. I guess the one good thing about your poem is that people still 'know' each other. Many people do not know anything about their neighbours or any in their street. We live in a money hungry society where time is money and there is no time for honey so I'm verly glad you took the time to share everything from your street. I loved the character' names. My sister is very good aat calling people by something that fits.
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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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My goodness how does one get the time to write poetry when there is so much gossip going on. I guess the one good thing about your poem is that people still 'know' each other. Many people do not know anything about their neighbours or any in their street. We live in a money hungry society where time is money and there is no time for honey so I'm verly glad you took the time to share everything from your street. I loved the character' names. My sister is very good aat calling people by something that fits.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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marilyn2, love you comments!! Than you so much for stopping by..your time and review are appreciated very much..jlsavell
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thanks for says thanks. Will there be more back fence gossip soon?
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hahaha, I don't think so..lol
Comment from adewpearl
Your rhyming couplets tell a great story of all the neighborhood gossips - I love the names you have given all these characters who interact scandalously with each other and tattle on each other - most amusing while imparting the lesson that those who gossip and pass judgment, including the speaker, will get stung. Brooke
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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Your rhyming couplets tell a great story of all the neighborhood gossips - I love the names you have given all these characters who interact scandalously with each other and tattle on each other - most amusing while imparting the lesson that those who gossip and pass judgment, including the speaker, will get stung. Brooke
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2009
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Brooke, thank you for stopping by..your time and review are always appreciated more than I can express..this was a fun write..again thank you..jlsavell
Comment from King Arthur
That my dear was a real classic well done. During fifty years of miistry, the "Gossip" was the worst of all, destroying homes, marriages, and reputations. I used to tell ahe old but not new story o the feather pillow. See how dated? Now pillows are stuffed with foam and synthetic "stiff." but then carried a more powerful lesson. A town gossip came to the pastor's study in tears, someone had called her hand, She told here pastor that her tale was mostly true with only a little embellishment.
Thr pastor picked up a small well worn pillow and with pocket knife in hand and ripped the end of the pillow.
"Take this to the corner and scoop a handfull at a time and throw the feather into the win, do th thurough job, scatter them well.
Shed and returned with the empty case, extending it to the pastor, he motioned her to keep it and return outside and gather up every single feather. She grimaced, "There were so many and I told such a small lie."
The pastor admonished her, "Today there was justa mile wind and you couldn't gather the feathers, what if there had been a strong wind?"
"I still couldn't have gather them all," "Nor can you rectifythe damage that your GOSSIP caused!"
Indeed a story well written and sharred,
Arthur
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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That my dear was a real classic well done. During fifty years of miistry, the "Gossip" was the worst of all, destroying homes, marriages, and reputations. I used to tell ahe old but not new story o the feather pillow. See how dated? Now pillows are stuffed with foam and synthetic "stiff." but then carried a more powerful lesson. A town gossip came to the pastor's study in tears, someone had called her hand, She told here pastor that her tale was mostly true with only a little embellishment.
Thr pastor picked up a small well worn pillow and with pocket knife in hand and ripped the end of the pillow.
"Take this to the corner and scoop a handfull at a time and throw the feather into the win, do th thurough job, scatter them well.
Shed and returned with the empty case, extending it to the pastor, he motioned her to keep it and return outside and gather up every single feather. She grimaced, "There were so many and I told such a small lie."
The pastor admonished her, "Today there was justa mile wind and you couldn't gather the feathers, what if there had been a strong wind?"
"I still couldn't have gather them all," "Nor can you rectifythe damage that your GOSSIP caused!"
Indeed a story well written and sharred,
Arthur
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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King Arthur, thank you for sharing that story. Only you in all your wisdom. thank you thank you..you will never know howc appreciated you are..now you go take on the day..jimi
Comment from Hitcher
You don't say!!!!! A young feisty fellow who leaves you breathless in the sack, who cares about the gossip! Ha ha. A very clever poem jimi with some great names and tit bits offered, loved the directional change and the moral message imprinted on the readers mind, we have all been guilty at some point or other and it is so easy to fall into the trap of only listening yet still managing to contribute that's for sure. Take it easy friend!
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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You don't say!!!!! A young feisty fellow who leaves you breathless in the sack, who cares about the gossip! Ha ha. A very clever poem jimi with some great names and tit bits offered, loved the directional change and the moral message imprinted on the readers mind, we have all been guilty at some point or other and it is so easy to fall into the trap of only listening yet still managing to contribute that's for sure. Take it easy friend!
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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Hitcher. I do say!!!! right who cares about the gossip if thats the price!!!! lol..you are so funny.thanks my friend for stopping by..your review is quite astute..jimi
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Always a pleasure friend!
Comment from judiblaze
I love the names you chose. Yes, isn't it just the case, the gossip, the exageration of tiny tidbits of life. I really like this, it's playful and honest. Didn't see any errors
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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I love the names you chose. Yes, isn't it just the case, the gossip, the exageration of tiny tidbits of life. I really like this, it's playful and honest. Didn't see any errors
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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judiblaze, wow, thank you so very much. I wanted it to be playful as it was a long write..your comments and review are appreciated very much..again thank you jlsavell
Comment from J. Wrangler
Dear jlsavell.
Gossip is well...fun to some and destroying to another. I live far out in country setting and have no near neighbor to sit a spell and tell tales with. I like the way you wrote this, a comical ballad of how you inadvertently fooled everyone. I enjoyed your choice of names for all your varied characters.No errors seen by me,
J
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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Dear jlsavell.
Gossip is well...fun to some and destroying to another. I live far out in country setting and have no near neighbor to sit a spell and tell tales with. I like the way you wrote this, a comical ballad of how you inadvertently fooled everyone. I enjoyed your choice of names for all your varied characters.No errors seen by me,
J
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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J Wrangler, thank yuo so very much for stopping by. I am so glad you enjoyed my offering. Your comments and review are appreciated very much..again thank you jlsavell
Comment from joan marie
It was really clever the way you came up with so many terms for gossip. It would make a good satirical short story also. Lot's of fun to read. joan marie
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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It was really clever the way you came up with so many terms for gossip. It would make a good satirical short story also. Lot's of fun to read. joan marie
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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joan marie, how are you..yes this was such a fun write. I could think of a few more, but then it would really beecome a tongue twister..again thank you..jimi
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Maybe you could make it like a neighborhood thing and do part 2? jm
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yes that would be a great idea..
Comment from rmdelta
jimi,
This was a delightfully refreshing view. It is quite humorous and very clever. In just one writing, you've hit old Mrs. Cravitts in the head and ended anybody spreading gossip forever. lol Great work. I really enjoyed the notes.
Reggie
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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jimi,
This was a delightfully refreshing view. It is quite humorous and very clever. In just one writing, you've hit old Mrs. Cravitts in the head and ended anybody spreading gossip forever. lol Great work. I really enjoyed the notes.
Reggie
Comment Written 02-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2009
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Reggie, thank you so very much. I always appreciate your wonderful comments and reviews..sometimes I can be humorous. again thank you jimi