An Invitation
inspired by a writing prompt68 total reviews
Comment from jwlee211
Interesting take on the thought of heaven. You have great word choices that pull the reader into the poem. Great vocabulary words.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2010
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Interesting take on the thought of heaven. You have great word choices that pull the reader into the poem. Great vocabulary words.
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2010
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jwlee211, thank you very much for stopping by to read and review my poetry. I appreciate your time and wonderful comments..thank you..jls
Comment from Ash Madox
I thought I would explore your work after your kind and thoughtful review of mine, J, and I'm glad I did. I'm shy of commenting on works with direct references to God on this site, but make rare exceptions. The beauty of your words and thoughts are too much to resist. This poetry is like a magnificent, lyrical painting of so much our planet has to offer. Makes me glad to be alive, and as you stated, reluctant to leave it behind. Upotia may be enticing in all its promises, but what is before your own eyes is proof enough to stay and play.
A wonderfully sonic work with poetic grace. Loved every single line, and the entire uplifting tone. Exceptional. Contest or not, it's gold star material, for me. Cheers for the wonderful read. Ash.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2010
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I thought I would explore your work after your kind and thoughtful review of mine, J, and I'm glad I did. I'm shy of commenting on works with direct references to God on this site, but make rare exceptions. The beauty of your words and thoughts are too much to resist. This poetry is like a magnificent, lyrical painting of so much our planet has to offer. Makes me glad to be alive, and as you stated, reluctant to leave it behind. Upotia may be enticing in all its promises, but what is before your own eyes is proof enough to stay and play.
A wonderfully sonic work with poetic grace. Loved every single line, and the entire uplifting tone. Exceptional. Contest or not, it's gold star material, for me. Cheers for the wonderful read. Ash.
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2010
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Ash Madox, goodness .. thank you so very very much. I apologize for the late response. My time is limited on this site. I, too, am shy and tend to veer always from religious themes. This, although it does reference God, I fell appeals to all of mankind, despite their belief system. again thank you so very much for such a wonderful compliment of my work and review. I am truly humbled..jls
Comment from adewpearl
Your quatrains have steady cadence and strong rhyming couplets, and I just love the descriptive detail and all the wonderful examples you provide that explain this speaker's eventual decision to stay right here on Earth if she gets to decide - you really do convince the reader that we have paradise here already - Beethoven, carousels, chameleon lizards, deer, daffodils, children chasing kites - each example just makes life as we can experience it sound better and better :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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Your quatrains have steady cadence and strong rhyming couplets, and I just love the descriptive detail and all the wonderful examples you provide that explain this speaker's eventual decision to stay right here on Earth if she gets to decide - you really do convince the reader that we have paradise here already - Beethoven, carousels, chameleon lizards, deer, daffodils, children chasing kites - each example just makes life as we can experience it sound better and better :-) Brooke
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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Brooke, sweet Brooke, thank you for stopping by with such a wonderful review. This was prompted by a writing prompt last week that said..How would you convince God you deserved to go to Heaven? I had an epiphany of sorts and it inspired me to write of such. Life here is splendid and truly full of beauty. I shall have no trouble convincing you of such, because you write of Earth's beauty and what it has to offer every single day. This happens to be my perception and belief system when it is stated That the Heaven's belong to God, but He has put Earth in the hearts of men. I will have to give you exact scripture and quote in a few..anyway thank you so very very much..jlsavell
Comment from fictionwriter
What if all that exists there, plus much more we've never seen or experienced? Would you go then, to see the serphim and cherbum, the flaming sword and the streets of gold. I loved this, but think of all the great things we might see there. Animals not of this world. Great job.
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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What if all that exists there, plus much more we've never seen or experienced? Would you go then, to see the serphim and cherbum, the flaming sword and the streets of gold. I loved this, but think of all the great things we might see there. Animals not of this world. Great job.
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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fictionwriter, yes what if??? Interesting question and one that I have pondered on greatly. The answer is no, I love life here and I do beleive it when The scriptures say "The Earth, He has put in the hearts of man." This is what makes life so very interesting..we all have different perceptions and or belief system. Again thank you so very much.. by the way I have started rading your latest book and I love it. I am on chapter 8 and I will send you plenty of reviews tomorrow.. It is truly a great story.. again thank you so very much..jimi
Comment from zoocq
I really enjoyed your work! How beautifully written, graphically illustrated with your imagery and the flow and cadence were so musical. Bravo!
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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I really enjoyed your work! How beautifully written, graphically illustrated with your imagery and the flow and cadence were so musical. Bravo!
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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zoocq, thank you so very much!!! I am thrilled. I appreciate your time for reading and reviewing my lengthy poem. Goodness I am in awe that this poem is so well received..again thank you..jlsavell
Comment from Ann Smith
This poem is filled with poetic gems and images of beauty. It has a natural rhythm and flow that imitate the things that you have mentioned in your poem, like the deer and the birth of a baby. I agree that earth has many things that satisfy our hearts desire, but heaven is suppose to be even better. ann
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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This poem is filled with poetic gems and images of beauty. It has a natural rhythm and flow that imitate the things that you have mentioned in your poem, like the deer and the birth of a baby. I agree that earth has many things that satisfy our hearts desire, but heaven is suppose to be even better. ann
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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Ann Smith, oh goodness thank you so very much for such a stellar review. It is interesting to note each individual's perception of life and their belief system. Again thank yuo so very very much. I did enjoy writing it..jlsavell
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My pleasure. ann
Comment from Joan E.
When I started reading your poem, I thought it would be quite serious, and found it to be quite playful, and then it became lyrical and finally much more thought provoking and profound--an interesting blend. I enjoyed your rhyme scheme as well.
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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When I started reading your poem, I thought it would be quite serious, and found it to be quite playful, and then it became lyrical and finally much more thought provoking and profound--an interesting blend. I enjoyed your rhyme scheme as well.
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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Joan E. Thank you so very very much for stopping by. Yes true to your assessment it had many elements to it. You are very kind to have taken your time with this poem..this was inspired by a prompt last week that asked how you would convince God you deserved to go to Heaven and it ignited an inspiration as well as an epiphany...Earth and life are splendid. again thank you so very much..jsavell..
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Thank you for your feedback and additional context for your inspiration and for a richer understanding of your poem. -Joan
Comment from Nicki_Mist
You wrote from a very lovely point of view and the word usage was just awesome, very creative and full of imagery. I like what you had to say but i would accept the invitation for I believe that the same God that made all this earth has a much grander heaven ready for us to play with the wild beast and eat fruit from the tree of life that we cannot imagine the taste and so on. He offers us so much more than we have now that our minds cannot comprehend. Your poem is thought pondering and I enjoyed it alot.
Hugs, Nicole
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reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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You wrote from a very lovely point of view and the word usage was just awesome, very creative and full of imagery. I like what you had to say but i would accept the invitation for I believe that the same God that made all this earth has a much grander heaven ready for us to play with the wild beast and eat fruit from the tree of life that we cannot imagine the taste and so on. He offers us so much more than we have now that our minds cannot comprehend. Your poem is thought pondering and I enjoyed it alot.
Hugs, Nicole
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-May-2010
reply by the author on 30-May-2010
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Nicki_Mist, this is what makes the world go around, so many perceptions of God's Promise and His splendid gifts..thank you so much for stopping by and reading my lengthy poem..you are appreciated very much..jlsavell