Yearning for Companionship
Senyru (glancing 'cross the room)12 total reviews
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Wow... now there's the definition of detached and disengaged, yeah? The only thing that would have made it even more so is if she would have stared through you.. :/ Great evocation with but those few syllables that you do so well, Mark! ;) Thanx, as always, for sharing your pen! ;)
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
Wow... now there's the definition of detached and disengaged, yeah? The only thing that would have made it even more so is if she would have stared through you.. :/ Great evocation with but those few syllables that you do so well, Mark! ;) Thanx, as always, for sharing your pen! ;)
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-
Thanks Yvette for such a warming review! In hindsight, I hope the woman depicted was not overdosed. However, the person looking her way may have been too detached and not been brave enough to take the first step in the relationship (-;
I am pleasantly surprised at the support and different interpretations other reviewers have cited.
Mark
Mark
Comment from Bill Schott
This senryu, Yearning for Companionship, has the proper formatting and seems to indicate that the "yearning" does not include the poet, who is "oblivious" to her.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
This senryu, Yearning for Companionship, has the proper formatting and seems to indicate that the "yearning" does not include the poet, who is "oblivious" to her.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-
Bill,
It was not me who was doing the yearning. My mythical person has tried before but without success LOL
Mark
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Good artwork and nice presentation, Mark.
-A well written poem with a good topic.
-A very good opening line sets the scene.
-You do a good job describing this woman
who has no interest in the person who
has expressed an interest.
-Very well done.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-Good artwork and nice presentation, Mark.
-A well written poem with a good topic.
-A very good opening line sets the scene.
-You do a good job describing this woman
who has no interest in the person who
has expressed an interest.
-Very well done.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-
Thanks for your generous words for my poem. Your read is likely correct about her interest.
Mark
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Mark,
You tell a sad story here in just 3 short lines. He is infatuated with this woman, but she is lost in deep thought and somewhat distressed. She takes no note of him. He is far beneath her thoughts. Perhaps, she is pining for someone who treats her the very same way she is treating this poor man... without a second thought. She has run amok with her eyes wide open. Perplexed. Hopeless, as will be his admiration.
Nicely penned!
Cheers,
Kimbob
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
Hi Mark,
You tell a sad story here in just 3 short lines. He is infatuated with this woman, but she is lost in deep thought and somewhat distressed. She takes no note of him. He is far beneath her thoughts. Perhaps, she is pining for someone who treats her the very same way she is treating this poor man... without a second thought. She has run amok with her eyes wide open. Perplexed. Hopeless, as will be his admiration.
Nicely penned!
Cheers,
Kimbob
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-
Kimbob,
Interesting viewpoint you expressed for this poem. My guess he is more interested (infatuated?) with her than the reverse. Or is she too oblivious to recognize his yearning? (-;
Mark
Comment from Pamusart
Hi Mark
Hmmm is she oblivious to your looks because she is staring into space or because she already saw you and it's not interested
Either way it hurts. I know it hurts.
Great job. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
Hi Mark
Hmmm is she oblivious to your looks because she is staring into space or because she already saw you and it's not interested
Either way it hurts. I know it hurts.
Great job. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-
It was a mythical person I wrote about. In my mind, she is just oblivious to the possibility of any relationship.
Mark
Comment from Claire Tennant
This is an imagination spinner. It is a realistic portrayal in a lot of cases. I love the picture you chose; it speaks volumes. The rhythm and the choice of words tell a beautiful, if not a sad, story. I wish you well in the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
This is an imagination spinner. It is a realistic portrayal in a lot of cases. I love the picture you chose; it speaks volumes. The rhythm and the choice of words tell a beautiful, if not a sad, story. I wish you well in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2025
-
Claire,
Thank you for your interpretation for this poem. Since I use FanArt illustrations for almost all my posts, I can take only a small credit for the images of my overall presentation that entertained you.
I write mostly 5-7-5 syllabled lines. Longer ones are not in my poetry wheelhouse.
Mark
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
Mark, you paint a compelling picture with your words and leave us with a feeling of lonliness and isolation. Nice artwork to add to your presentation. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
Mark, you paint a compelling picture with your words and leave us with a feeling of lonliness and isolation. Nice artwork to add to your presentation. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
-
Thanks Marilyn for your support for this post. Your read is accurate.
Mark
Comment from tempeste
I love this moment in time..
She is unaware of being the interest of another in the room ..
Will he find the courage to make his move and introduce himself
will she brush him off or reward him a smile and start talking
I just love imagining all the possible outcomes.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
I love this moment in time..
She is unaware of being the interest of another in the room ..
Will he find the courage to make his move and introduce himself
will she brush him off or reward him a smile and start talking
I just love imagining all the possible outcomes.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
-
Thanks,
Pleased with your response to this post.
Mark
Comment from June Sargent
That's so sad! Oblivious to his stolen glances. You've successfully captured the bittersweet feeling of love from a distance. Maybe he should make a move?
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
That's so sad! Oblivious to his stolen glances. You've successfully captured the bittersweet feeling of love from a distance. Maybe he should make a move?
Comment Written 20-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
-
June,
I like your idea about the next move (-;
Mark
Comment from karenina
Nice Senryu! You leave it up to the reader to wonder where her mind is...
That image gives us many options. Is she bored? Day dreaming? Sad?
I'm captivated wondering... Mysterious! You've caught my attention with this one!
Karenina
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
Nice Senryu! You leave it up to the reader to wonder where her mind is...
That image gives us many options. Is she bored? Day dreaming? Sad?
I'm captivated wondering... Mysterious! You've caught my attention with this one!
Karenina
Comment Written 20-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2025
-
Thanks Karenina!
I found my choices were limited on my go to FanArt selection. So, I chose one with a woman who appears bored with her situation. No wonder the guy had no chance.
Mark
-
Hmm. Thanks for the insight! (Appearing bored could be a ruse)
Smile....