Burn It All Down
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "The Inferno"A war of a few against a syndicate
2 total reviews
Comment from lancellot
An action-packed chapter, with good pacing.
notes:
"We still have this," he stated. Grayson regarded it cautiously,
"You sure you're ready to use it now?" Alex hesitated before responding.
-Recommend separating the speakers and actors here.
"We still have this," he stated.
Grayson regarded it cautiously,
"You sure you're ready to use it now?"
Alex hesitated before responding.
I would also recommend separating their lines at the end.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2025
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An action-packed chapter, with good pacing.
notes:
"We still have this," he stated. Grayson regarded it cautiously,
"You sure you're ready to use it now?" Alex hesitated before responding.
-Recommend separating the speakers and actors here.
"We still have this," he stated.
Grayson regarded it cautiously,
"You sure you're ready to use it now?"
Alex hesitated before responding.
I would also recommend separating their lines at the end.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2025
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lol, do you know what happens, when i'm editing, i get into reading the book and forget what i'm doing
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Your story pulls me right into the craziness. I loved how the action felt so
intense. The dialogue between Alex and Grayson really stood out. I could picture every moment of the battle. The tension in Alex's decision was gripping. And the way you wrapped it up was just perfect. Great job creating such a thrilling chapter.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2025
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Your story pulls me right into the craziness. I loved how the action felt so
intense. The dialogue between Alex and Grayson really stood out. I could picture every moment of the battle. The tension in Alex's decision was gripping. And the way you wrapped it up was just perfect. Great job creating such a thrilling chapter.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2025
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more to come
