Human Nature
500 words. Hopefully fiction17 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
The future looks a lot like the past. That must be because the human race never really changes. You make that point extremely clear. Good luck to the general. Somewhere, someone will want a leader that will fight. Like you, I would love to have peace. Unfortunately, trusting that it will happen isn't wise.
The future looks a lot like the past. That must be because the human race never really changes. You make that point extremely clear. Good luck to the general. Somewhere, someone will want a leader that will fight. Like you, I would love to have peace. Unfortunately, trusting that it will happen isn't wise.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from Dawn Munro
First, re: your author's notes - I concur!
This is a riveting read. Not only do you tell a story that is uncomfortably close to the truth about many of our elected officials, you do it in such a way as to deliver a powerful moral.
Nicely done!
First, re: your author's notes - I concur!
This is a riveting read. Not only do you tell a story that is uncomfortably close to the truth about many of our elected officials, you do it in such a way as to deliver a powerful moral.
Nicely done!
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from in777wr#
This was a very well written story. It made me think that at times we can be over trusting. This story had me glued from beginning to end. Very interesting.
This was a very well written story. It made me think that at times we can be over trusting. This story had me glued from beginning to end. Very interesting.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from Daedalia
This is a good, albeit disturbing, read. The only spag I saw was "insure" s/b "ensure". The only other thing you might want to consider is making "Silence" its own sentence - for emphasis, an exclamation point after it as well.
That said, your story kept my attention throughout. Snow was a naive idealist - sad, really. I especially like the last few words "people who thought man could evolve out of human nature". Excellent ending! Very solid entry.
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2014
This is a good, albeit disturbing, read. The only spag I saw was "insure" s/b "ensure". The only other thing you might want to consider is making "Silence" its own sentence - for emphasis, an exclamation point after it as well.
That said, your story kept my attention throughout. Snow was a naive idealist - sad, really. I especially like the last few words "people who thought man could evolve out of human nature". Excellent ending! Very solid entry.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much. I will fix that, and you're right. Silence! is much better.
Comment from Delores J. Howard
Oh, what can I say. I know--I would give you six stars if I could. This was so good. It could be a movie--or it could be real life (God forbid). You had me from the get-go and you held me to the end. Wonderful piece.
Oh, what can I say. I know--I would give you six stars if I could. This was so good. It could be a movie--or it could be real life (God forbid). You had me from the get-go and you held me to the end. Wonderful piece.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the story. In like the moral. Don not expect humans to evolve beyond human nature. At least, not for a long time. We all wish there were no war but we are no where near mature enough for that. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
I love the story. In like the moral. Don not expect humans to evolve beyond human nature. At least, not for a long time. We all wish there were no war but we are no where near mature enough for that. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from maggieadams
This is beyond good and so realistic for futuristic writing. I wish for peace too, but just look at the Middle East and Iran who have their fingers crossed behind their backs as they "tweak" their nuclear program just a little so all the sanctions can be lifted and they can start building to the destruction of Israel and the
West.
This is beyond good and so realistic for futuristic writing. I wish for peace too, but just look at the Middle East and Iran who have their fingers crossed behind their backs as they "tweak" their nuclear program just a little so all the sanctions can be lifted and they can start building to the destruction of Israel and the
West.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from A Matter Of Words
You have presented an very interesting, yet disturbing, dilemma warring nations must always face. This is an excellent flash fiction, describing one such moment. Excellent.
You have presented an very interesting, yet disturbing, dilemma warring nations must always face. This is an excellent flash fiction, describing one such moment. Excellent.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from Sylvia Page
An action for peace is rewarded by deceit. I hate to think of what happened to President Snow and her loyal council members. Good story. Well done.
Best wishes in the contest.
Cheers
Sylvia
An action for peace is rewarded by deceit. I hate to think of what happened to President Snow and her loyal council members. Good story. Well done.
Best wishes in the contest.
Cheers
Sylvia
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Brilliant! I wish all those foolish peaceniks who want to disarm us and weaken our military could read this. Perhaps we need a hit movie based on this great story to wake people up.
Brilliant! I wish all those foolish peaceniks who want to disarm us and weaken our military could read this. Perhaps we need a hit movie based on this great story to wake people up.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2014