The Day Has to Die
Tanka- Jisei poem19 total reviews
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I am confessing know little of Japanese form.
I understand this needed to be 5-7 -5 = senyru
and this adds a little more to become Jesei, still I want to here a rhyme such as arrive for die but that's an extra syllabe.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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I am confessing know little of Japanese form.
I understand this needed to be 5-7 -5 = senyru
and this adds a little more to become Jesei, still I want to here a rhyme such as arrive for die but that's an extra syllabe.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much i am sorry for the delay in reply ...health problems!!
Comment from lyenochka
A great jisei tanka. I do agree that the end of the day results in the recreation of a new day and it's a cycle we see all around us. I especially liked " leaves forsake their trees" because of the emotional quality of "forsake" and the personification.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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A great jisei tanka. I do agree that the end of the day results in the recreation of a new day and it's a cycle we see all around us. I especially liked " leaves forsake their trees" because of the emotional quality of "forsake" and the personification.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you Helen .sorry for the delay in reply. I can read in my Android phone but typing into it is a problem
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No, reading is hard too. But I meant use an app to have the text read to you. So you can close your eyes, or do exercises, and mostly don't hurt your body because of sitting at the computer. 💖
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
What exactly is a Jisei poem? It is very helpful for you poems pro's to tell us lowly nitwits about the new style (new to us anyway) poem we are seeing.
For instance: The Jisei is another old Japanese style form of poetry. There are 5 lines, I stanza. Normally about the end of life. Additionally, between lines three and four you must hop on one foot for ten seconds. :-) Good writing. Karen
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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What exactly is a Jisei poem? It is very helpful for you poems pro's to tell us lowly nitwits about the new style (new to us anyway) poem we are seeing.
For instance: The Jisei is another old Japanese style form of poetry. There are 5 lines, I stanza. Normally about the end of life. Additionally, between lines three and four you must hop on one foot for ten seconds. :-) Good writing. Karen
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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IT was a club entry .It was mentioned in the club page .Thanks for dropping by .I am sorry for the delay .. not keeping well
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Are you ill sweetie? I am sending good wishes your way.
Comment from patcelaw
This is beautifully written for the club event, and I wish you the very best with all of your writing. I do hope you have a wonderful weekend and that your ahead is blessed. Patricia .
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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This is beautifully written for the club event, and I wish you the very best with all of your writing. I do hope you have a wonderful weekend and that your ahead is blessed. Patricia .
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thanks a lot for stopping by and I am sorry for the delay in reply
Comment from Gunner Lil
A very nice picture to go along with a very good poem.
An easy read with a lot of wisdom for us to engulf.
Poem has a good flow and easy pace.
Thank you.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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A very nice picture to go along with a very good poem.
An easy read with a lot of wisdom for us to engulf.
Poem has a good flow and easy pace.
Thank you.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you very mucch sorry for the delay in replying .not keeping good health ...
Comment from Bill Schott
This tanka, The Day has to Die, has the proper formatting and finds that days and leaves and all other things must move along on their way and let new lives immerge.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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This tanka, The Day has to Die, has the proper formatting and finds that days and leaves and all other things must move along on their way and let new lives immerge.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much am sorry for the delay in my reply .not lkeeping good health.
Comment from GWHARGIS
The depth of this poem was amazing. It was full of obvious points of life but brought to life by age old wisdom. Beautifully written. I thoroughly enjoyed this. Gretchen
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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The depth of this poem was amazing. It was full of obvious points of life but brought to life by age old wisdom. Beautifully written. I thoroughly enjoyed this. Gretchen
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much .sorry for the delay in replying as well as readin g I am not keeping good health ..
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is a very interesting club entry. Yes, I guess the day has to die, but I never really thought of it as dying. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am going to have to think about this poem.
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reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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This is a very interesting club entry. Yes, I guess the day has to die, but I never really thought of it as dying. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am going to have to think about this poem.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much sorry for the delay in my reply
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello, Santha!
A very well-crafted and introspective tanka.
Your pivot line works well.
And yes, men as well as leaves must "fall in line." Wonderful play on words.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
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reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Hello, Santha!
A very well-crafted and introspective tanka.
Your pivot line works well.
And yes, men as well as leaves must "fall in line." Wonderful play on words.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much am sorry for the delay in my reply .I have severe neck and shoulder pain .so my computer time is limited(as per medical advice)