Comment from Teri7

Excellent

This is a very good chapter you have penned. I need to read more of your book. You used very good descriptive wording and great dialog. God bless. Teri

 Comment Written 15-May-2008

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reply by the author on 16-May-2008

Hi Teri,

Thanks so much for the kind review and the blessing. If you read the previous chapters you might want to read all the book. There's no bucks left so I don't need a review, but I'd appreciate your input for here on out.

Thanks again,

Gayle

Comment from rhymer1

Excellent

Excellent narrative and dialog throughout this chapter. My few comments while reading are below. Slainte, rhyme1

The car resumed driving. - this feels wrong. Say it some other way

limited to movies, TV[,] and gossip - This screams for a comma.

in (what seemed like) one fluid movement

 Comment Written 15-May-2008

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reply by the author on 16-May-2008

Hey Rhymer,

I was hoping someone would give me an idea about that. I didn't like it either but couldn't figure how to change it. Maybe just "The car started moving again?"

You know about me and commas. If that is screaming at ya, I gotta give it to ya! LOL!

Hey, thanks so much for the eagle eye and the fine R&R.

Best,
Gayle

reply by rhymer1 on 16-May-2008

I usually make suggestions for change, but I recall thinking about this one and drawing a blank.

Comment from Korton

Excellent

Ok, I like this, the super sleuths are on the case and no doubt, Tony and Amy will be called into action again. If it has been three days already, Beth and all others involved must be terribly frantic. Very well done.

 Comment Written 15-May-2008

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reply by the author on 16-May-2008

Hey Frank,

Well, believe it or not, I wasn't sure this was going to be a Tony & Amy story at first. I was kinda heading in a different direction. All of a sudden it became clear that this story was theirs! LOL!

These characters, I'm sayin', bossy little creatures.

Thanks for the great R&R and your comments!

Hugs,
Gayle

Comment from Johnny Carwash

Excellent

You're doing an amazing job with this book and this chapter didn't disappoint. I like how this is developing. Very suspenseful and chilling. Can't wait to read more.

Word to the wise, though... at some point, you should edit things to where they're supposed to be. This didn't confuse me, but it might confuse somebody new to your book. Hope you don't mind the suggestion...

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 Comment Written 15-May-2008

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reply by the author on 15-May-2008

Hey Johnny,

I have fixed the ms, of course, but unfortunately, I sometimes get in too much of a hurry. I'm writing this as we go along, which can make for some bumps.

I'm working hard on keeping the threads and your word is duly noted.

Thanks for it and the great review,

Gayle