Short Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "So The Story Goes...."A book of a mixture of stories
64 total reviews
Comment from robyn corum
Carol,
hahahahaha So glad you brought this one back up. What a fun tale - and exactly right in so many ways, too. Everyone hears what they want and then passes on a modified portion of what they heard. Like the old game telephone. Fun stuff!
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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Carol,
hahahahaha So glad you brought this one back up. What a fun tale - and exactly right in so many ways, too. Everyone hears what they want and then passes on a modified portion of what they heard. Like the old game telephone. Fun stuff!
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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i was searching my stories for a few shorts for Matthew...he wants to practice filming with unknown area people to see what talent might exist... one day films no budget... I came across this one and added the beginning and doctored a little. It was fun!
Comment from BethShelby
I missed this one somehow. I think I joined in 2009 and left 2013 so you probably posted in before I knew you. It sounds about right for the way gossip travels. When something the first stories you here are always gross exaggerations and everyone that passes them on adds something. I'm glad your reposted this it is funny.
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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I missed this one somehow. I think I joined in 2009 and left 2013 so you probably posted in before I knew you. It sounds about right for the way gossip travels. When something the first stories you here are always gross exaggerations and everyone that passes them on adds something. I'm glad your reposted this it is funny.
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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I think it was in the early summer...not long after I had joined. No one knew who I was until suddenly my readership exploded. I added the beginning (making it seem scary) and then the humor popped. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Ric Myworld
Oh, rumors get started everywhere, because people just like to talk. Well, make others think they know more about everything than they actually do. I've always felt like the topic of conversation for most of my life. And few times was anything close to truth. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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Oh, rumors get started everywhere, because people just like to talk. Well, make others think they know more about everything than they actually do. I've always felt like the topic of conversation for most of my life. And few times was anything close to truth. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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Oh my... and I put you in my latest post. LOL I believe everything I said was true...LOl Sending my smiles and hugs your way... don't throw them back at me. LOL Smiles, Carol
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Carol, my dear, I'll take all those smiles and hugs you send my way and enjoy every one of them. I wake up every day hoping I can put a smile on someone's face. Now I'm thinking I might need to become huggie bear and go around giving out great-big bear hugs too. You always make me smile! Ric
Comment from Susan Newell
This is a delightful take on the old game of telephone and it also shows how people misinterpret the actions of others. I think it would be helpful to know Julie's age in the beginning. I just assumed adult, which turned out to be wrong. By starting in the first person you give us a firsthand account of what happened, and then switch perspectives. It works well. All in all, a good tale well told.
I made a few notes about the writing:
I passed the gate. -- I would clarify as "her gate" -- I wasn't sure of where the gate was.
"Mrs... Pickens, you scared me." -- Suggest: "Mrs. Pickens . . . you scared me."
saw a figure dressed in white, sail past Julie, -- need comma after figure
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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This is a delightful take on the old game of telephone and it also shows how people misinterpret the actions of others. I think it would be helpful to know Julie's age in the beginning. I just assumed adult, which turned out to be wrong. By starting in the first person you give us a firsthand account of what happened, and then switch perspectives. It works well. All in all, a good tale well told.
I made a few notes about the writing:
I passed the gate. -- I would clarify as "her gate" -- I wasn't sure of where the gate was.
"Mrs... Pickens, you scared me." -- Suggest: "Mrs. Pickens . . . you scared me."
saw a figure dressed in white, sail past Julie, -- need comma after figure
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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My dear Susan...what would I do without your pension for detail and making sure I do it right...I just included you in a post and I hope you won't mind. Smiles, Carol
Comment from karenina
Reminds me of the old "Telephone" game we used to play as kids. We'd all sit in A circle, the first kid would whisper A simple sentence into the ear of the next kid...who would repeat what he heard to the next kid...and so on...
What started as, say, "Crackers and peanut butter...would morph into " I'm gonna smack your mother!"
Hysterical back then! Clever story along the same lines!
Karenina
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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Reminds me of the old "Telephone" game we used to play as kids. We'd all sit in A circle, the first kid would whisper A simple sentence into the ear of the next kid...who would repeat what he heard to the next kid...and so on...
What started as, say, "Crackers and peanut butter...would morph into " I'm gonna smack your mother!"
Hysterical back then! Clever story along the same lines!
Karenina
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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I was looking for a short story that Matt could make a one day film out of...he wants to practice with his extras to see if any have talent. I stumbled across this one and added the spooky beginning and went from there. It was fun!
How are you and your hubby doing? Is everything okay?
Smiles and hugs...Carol
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He's home and I'm so glad... He IS weak and a bit fragile going up and down the steps...but that's where the bathroom and bedrooms are so I'm attending to his safety... I'm sure very day he'll be a bit stronger. Thanks for asking! Yes--this story did have some great twists in it! Like in real life, right? Everybody sees and hears things and expresses their perspective in a sometimes exaggerated way!--Karenina
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Glad things are a little easier for the both of you. You are in my mind constantly. Take care, Love ya, Carol
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Thanks...warm thoughts and prayers are mini-miracles!--Karenina
Comment from Iza Deleanu
This is so funny a to our can turns the world upside down and creates a buzz that will bring some fame to some bystanders. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings and the contest.
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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This is so funny a to our can turns the world upside down and creates a buzz that will bring some fame to some bystanders. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings and the contest.
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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I found it humorous how we can't seem to translate a few simple words from one person to the next without changing and elaborating the story. smiles, Carol
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Ingenious--so clever--this one is going into my bookcase--to savor and to share--hilarious exponential exaggerations lead up to the priceless solution to the mystery. Thanks for reviving this gem!
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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Ingenious--so clever--this one is going into my bookcase--to savor and to share--hilarious exponential exaggerations lead up to the priceless solution to the mystery. Thanks for reviving this gem!
Comment Written 26-May-2021
reply by the author on 26-May-2021
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Crazy isn't it? One simple version turns a whole neighborhood upside with wild thoughts... You'd think it was Halloween or something. Smiles, Carol
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This one's on my list!
Comment from Shaulina
This is so funny--talk about a game of telephone gone awry! Being from Iowa, I can appreciate how people in small towns start and continue the rumor mills.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2009
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This is so funny--talk about a game of telephone gone awry! Being from Iowa, I can appreciate how people in small towns start and continue the rumor mills.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2009
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2009
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Shaulina...Thank you for the kind review. I wanted a touch of humor rather than the horror. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks again - Carol
Comment from Readywriter52
Rumors can get started so easily. A dog covered in a sheet becomes a body dug from a grave wearing a wearing a long wedding dress. This is funny.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2009
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Rumors can get started so easily. A dog covered in a sheet becomes a body dug from a grave wearing a wearing a long wedding dress. This is funny.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2009
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2009
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ReadyWriter...
Thanks so much. Everyone else usually writes a thriller for a cemetery so I wanted to add a touch of humor instead. It was fun. Thanks for reading and commenting. Carol
Comment from KennyRogers
Hi there, Begin Again. Great Flash story with a really good twist to it. Loved it. What with the sheet being twisted round the dog's collar, and poor Mrs O'Malley, who's sure to get her knickers in a twist as well!
Well done and best wishes, Kenny
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2009
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Hi there, Begin Again. Great Flash story with a really good twist to it. Loved it. What with the sheet being twisted round the dog's collar, and poor Mrs O'Malley, who's sure to get her knickers in a twist as well!
Well done and best wishes, Kenny
Comment Written 12-Jul-2009
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2009
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Kenny
Thanks so much for the kind review. I liked the humor in it too. Appreciate your best wishes. Carol