Short Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "The Killer Is --"A book of a mixture of stories
47 total reviews
Comment from Rama Rao
A good mystery well written.
It had me riveted.
Watch that Begin Again. She may walk away with the prize for the contest.
She looks crafty and quite capable.
I enjoyed reading this piece.
Wish you good luck.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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A good mystery well written.
It had me riveted.
Watch that Begin Again. She may walk away with the prize for the contest.
She looks crafty and quite capable.
I enjoyed reading this piece.
Wish you good luck.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Ramarao,
Thank you for the kind encouragement. Glad you enjoyed the story. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hi Carol,
well you have done it again a real good ending to your story
The real killer left the room planing on writing a good mystery story
good one.
Gert
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Hi Carol,
well you have done it again a real good ending to your story
The real killer left the room planing on writing a good mystery story
good one.
Gert
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Gert,
One way or the other she wanted to end up on top...LOL Thanks for the review...Carol
Comment from --Turtle.
Hi Carol,
I read this piece, good dialog, nice descriptions. I liked the balance of tags and action tags here.
He I(i)gnored her question. "Why are you here this weekend?"
The (d)Detective smiled and moved to the next chair where another gorgeous brunette nibbled on her lower lip.
(I think its the old Hello Detective, are you a detective Yes, call me Detective, I am the detective... ? not sure, though)
The detective nodded. (be consistent though)
I read this short piece and it was enjoyable, I knew it was you all along!
fun.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Hi Carol,
I read this piece, good dialog, nice descriptions. I liked the balance of tags and action tags here.
He I(i)gnored her question. "Why are you here this weekend?"
The (d)Detective smiled and moved to the next chair where another gorgeous brunette nibbled on her lower lip.
(I think its the old Hello Detective, are you a detective Yes, call me Detective, I am the detective... ? not sure, though)
The detective nodded. (be consistent though)
I read this short piece and it was enjoyable, I knew it was you all along!
fun.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Turtle...
Why? Do I look like a murderer? Or just because I want to be on top of the heap? LOL I fixed the detective's...thanks!
smiles, Carol
Comment from Nanette Mary
Hullo Begin Again ...
You always manage to have such unexpected endings for your stories and this was no exception. I enjoyed reading what you have written and, because of your descriptive wording, being able to visualise and imagine the whole scene.
There is just one small correction to suggest ...
* You have - attending the writer's convention ...
this should be - the Writers Convention .... and I suggest that you should have a capital letter for Convention wherever the word appears because - that the the NAME of an event that is being held.
Thank you for sharing this with us. As it is a Contest entry, I wish you well.
With love from .. Nanette Mary.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Hullo Begin Again ...
You always manage to have such unexpected endings for your stories and this was no exception. I enjoyed reading what you have written and, because of your descriptive wording, being able to visualise and imagine the whole scene.
There is just one small correction to suggest ...
* You have - attending the writer's convention ...
this should be - the Writers Convention .... and I suggest that you should have a capital letter for Convention wherever the word appears because - that the the NAME of an event that is being held.
Thank you for sharing this with us. As it is a Contest entry, I wish you well.
With love from .. Nanette Mary.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Nanette,
Thanks for bringing that to my attention...guess I never gave it a thought. Nice job! Smiles to you, Carol
Comment from adewpearl
A funny mystery featuring some of the writers from our site - you sound as if you had fun with this one - I can tell Lola did too - I'm all for it, and I was entertained too! Brooke
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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A funny mystery featuring some of the writers from our site - you sound as if you had fun with this one - I can tell Lola did too - I'm all for it, and I was entertained too! Brooke
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Brooke,
Yes, I think it was fun twisting the other writers into the story...Glad you enjoyed it. smiles to you, Carol
Comment from MizKat
Begin Again - Your story was well written and very interesting. I enjoyed reading it from the first word to the last. Everything you write is always good. Kat
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Begin Again - Your story was well written and very interesting. I enjoyed reading it from the first word to the last. Everything you write is always good. Kat
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Kat,
Thank you so much for the wonderful review and comments . I always appreciate your comments...Smiles, Carol
Comment from anabelle
LOL! Fabulous story, Carol. What a good job you've done with this. Great action, great dialogue and love the conclusion.
LOL! Best of luck in the contest. Fabulous entry.
Regards, anabelle
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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LOL! Fabulous story, Carol. What a good job you've done with this. Great action, great dialogue and love the conclusion.
LOL! Best of luck in the contest. Fabulous entry.
Regards, anabelle
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Anabelle,
Thanks so much...originally I had all ten writers involved but too many words...I took something from every authors story and used it...I'll have to try again next time. Thanks so much for the wonderful comments. Smiles, Carol
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Should we ask writers if we can use their name? It seems like the right to do. What do you think?
Comment from DearlB
It appears to me you met the rules of the contest very neatly.
Ms. Beginagain is a sneaky old broad.
Lots of luck,
Dearl
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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It appears to me you met the rules of the contest very neatly.
Ms. Beginagain is a sneaky old broad.
Lots of luck,
Dearl
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Dearl,
Comes from living with those Italians too long I guess. LOL Thanks so much, Carol
Comment from Thesis
Framed again. That's the story of my life, lol. I enjoyed the action in this story and how you used the characters.
Okay, so there's three possibilities left: Ms. Pelle, Ms. Beginagain and the maid. I think Adina did it! LOL. - John
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Framed again. That's the story of my life, lol. I enjoyed the action in this story and how you used the characters.
Okay, so there's three possibilities left: Ms. Pelle, Ms. Beginagain and the maid. I think Adina did it! LOL. - John
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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John,
I was thrilled to see you've entered the contest. Can't wait to read what you have to offer. Hey, Benginagain didn't get to the top without a little help...Got competition..knock them off...Was married to an Italian too long, I think. LOL Smiles, Carol
Comment from fictionwriter
How funny. Well there is setting people up to take the fall, and getting away with it. Great job with this one, very funny. Well done.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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How funny. Well there is setting people up to take the fall, and getting away with it. Great job with this one, very funny. Well done.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
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Joy,Thanks for reading and enjoying my little murder mystery. Knocking them off one way or the other, I guess. Smiles, Carol