Spring Cleaning
A deep dark woods in May29 total reviews
Comment from Dave M
Susan,
This is an excellent short piece of fiction, no nits that I could see.
Just several days ago, a young woman's brother found her rotting remains in a forest. The law had already killed the creep who murdered her, but her body lay in the forest for weeks.
Dave
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2011
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Susan,
This is an excellent short piece of fiction, no nits that I could see.
Just several days ago, a young woman's brother found her rotting remains in a forest. The law had already killed the creep who murdered her, but her body lay in the forest for weeks.
Dave
Comment Written 06-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2011
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Near you??? Jeez, where do you live Dave? If I can ask...I watch the abomnible Nancy Grace, and see things or rather, HEAR HER yack, about them...How horrible in real life...the poor kid who found his sister. But, thank you for a wonderful rating and your time for me too Dave...Susan
Comment from adewpearl
What remains lays hidden - lies
it's rotors a brief disruption - drop the apostrophe
What a chilling realization, that the story is being narrated from the point of view of a corpse, left unceremoniously in the woods to rot and be consumed by maggots. There is an ending that packs a punch. Brooke
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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What remains lays hidden - lies
it's rotors a brief disruption - drop the apostrophe
What a chilling realization, that the story is being narrated from the point of view of a corpse, left unceremoniously in the woods to rot and be consumed by maggots. There is an ending that packs a punch. Brooke
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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OH I had it right the FIRST time! Oh, gee. Thank you my friend...what would I do without help? I am a lost corpse in a sea of words! ") Thank you thank you so much! ") Susan
Comment from misscookie
Another serious poem that truly touch me.
I was thinking about the four women they found in the woods then later found for more bodies in the woods. I long Island.
This is aomething to think about when you ride with strangers or walking in the wood it's not always the four legged animals you got to watch out for.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Another serious poem that truly touch me.
I was thinking about the four women they found in the woods then later found for more bodies in the woods. I long Island.
This is aomething to think about when you ride with strangers or walking in the wood it's not always the four legged animals you got to watch out for.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Oh yes, when I was in art school, I used to walk TEN times around a mile long circle that had a covered bridge I had to cross. Several times, there was an old pickup with a camper on it that would try to "catch" me in that bridge. So, if he would come toward me, I would always dart down the bank and jump the creek like a deer to avoid the bridge. I was never really afraid but probably should have been. I refused to let that stop my walks. I was healthy and thin back then! ") Thank you for another great review Cookie! xoxo. Susan
Comment from Trybuck
It seems there are more than we would like to think about. A very short one that gave some great detail.
hungary - hungry
The gore is left up to the reader to imagine. The horror is there. Well done, Buck
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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It seems there are more than we would like to think about. A very short one that gave some great detail.
hungary - hungry
The gore is left up to the reader to imagine. The horror is there. Well done, Buck
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Hi Buck! Thank you! I fixed the misspell. I was unable to use the preview mode so had to disable it, but it went out before I could get it done!! It has a pix now! Thank you so much!! Susan
Comment from Veekz
Very nice, creepy yet sad story. You've given a voice to, no doubt, countless forgotten bodies left in places like that. Great visual descriptions, love the bit about the insects pausing while the helicopter flies overhead. It's the small details like that, that really put your reader into the story with you.
This is definitely a chilling little piece!! :)
And a good read never the less of course :)
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Very nice, creepy yet sad story. You've given a voice to, no doubt, countless forgotten bodies left in places like that. Great visual descriptions, love the bit about the insects pausing while the helicopter flies overhead. It's the small details like that, that really put your reader into the story with you.
This is definitely a chilling little piece!! :)
And a good read never the less of course :)
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Hi there Jess!! THank you...I am told dead men don't talk, but I like expressing what a ghost or soul might be thinking? Odd, I guess. But so so happy you liked this! HUGS! AND I am hoping my family and I don't end up such...xoxo.
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Dead men do so talk - they obviously spoke to you for this story! Tehehe just kidding :) I don't think it's odd, I think it's actually very clever - a point of view not many other people could have come up with thats for sure :) I do wish you would somehow get your butt's over here so I could stop worring about you all.....
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I know, me too. Can you imagine me draggin three horses, three dogs, and four cats to N.Zealand??? OMG! I do wish tho. ") LUV, suse
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At least once they were here there would be plenty of room for them! LOL :):)
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Oh I can only dream! ") Wow, you are so fortunate to live in such a place...I would LOVE To ride my horse around a peaceful little town with NICE people. Gee. "( S.
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Hmmm we're not all nice and it's not really that peaceful but more so then yours sounds - and yes, you can ride your horse around town :)
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I know, there are meanies EVERYWHERE, I just hate it. Sure hope you have some decent ones around you! BTW! ?? How's your weather??? I am getting a real gutful of this COLD...") S.
Comment from Michelle S
You created a clear image in a few words. We would probably be very surprised at how often this happens.
You made reference to a neat picture in you author notes but there was no picture there.
Well done.
Michelle
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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You created a clear image in a few words. We would probably be very surprised at how often this happens.
You made reference to a neat picture in you author notes but there was no picture there.
Well done.
Michelle
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Hi Michelle! Thank you so much! There was no Preview option, so I had to hurry and disable this to get the pix there? And edit it. No fun. But you are kind to read it anyway and let me know what you think! Thank you again!! Susan
Comment from Carolyn Hilliard
I did not know what to expect; only what not to expect. So when you came up dead - .... Good job. I love an unexpected outcome that I cannot figure out before I get to the punch.
Other creatures too, hatch, and are hungary. [hungry]
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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I did not know what to expect; only what not to expect. So when you came up dead - .... Good job. I love an unexpected outcome that I cannot figure out before I get to the punch.
Other creatures too, hatch, and are hungary. [hungry]
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Hi Fiesty! Thank you! I am told dead men don't talk, but mine do! Ha. Thanks for this help too! I fixed!! It's nice to hear from you!! ") Susan
Comment from c_lucas
People disappear in the cities. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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People disappear in the cities. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Hi Charlie! I know, everywhere. It's really awful too. I often wonder if many are taken to the stars? Or Area 51...? Ha. Great to hear from you!! Thank you again! Susan
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You're welcome, Susan. Charlie
Comment from Nanashirley
It is a good story and a gory one. I wish there had been more. I liked the descriptions and the way you ended with life going on if only maggots. I saw no need for editing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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It is a good story and a gory one. I wish there had been more. I liked the descriptions and the way you ended with life going on if only maggots. I saw no need for editing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2011
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Hi Shirley! Thank you!! I guess it could be longer? I may expand it. THere are a couple of others too, that someone said the same thing! Thank you for this imput and great review!! Susan