Comment from R. K. Alan

Excellent

This is nicely done. It sounds like the beginning of an interesting story. In fact, I wanted more to help continue the chill. Thanks for sharing. ray aka krylon

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2011

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2011

Hi Ray! It was longer and I cut it a lot? Someone else said the same thing...I will try to make it a bit longer next time? Thank you for a great review! Good to hear from you! Susan

Comment from Trybuck

Excellent

I hear the music playing
that awful, eerie tune
Those hands keep swaying
all over the darkened room
And I keep on praying
that it's not impending doom
Gasping for each labored breath
I'll take my last very soon
Those hands will be my death
as I view my last full moon

Well done with your flash fiction, Buck

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2011

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2011

") I love this poem! Buck, you should post these! What fun and this would be a great little Halloween poem! Thank you! I always enjoy these from you! What a grand talent you have, don't save these? Share with everyone? Thank you again! Smiles and a hug. Susan

Comment from Mary Ann MCPhedran

Excellent

A good write with good flow, an exciting piece of work I cant wait for the next piece. A VERY INTERESTING STORY, Thanks for sharing with me. Susan. luv Mary

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2011

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2011

Hi Mary! Thanks! This was a nightmare my son had when he was young? So I had to put a nightlite in his room finally. I don't know why I remembered this! Thanks for being here! I really appreciate! xoxo! Susan

Comment from CodyJack

Excellent

I was thinking origionally that if it was nice figures undulating like belly dancers in the night, this might be a good thing. LOL Just kidding. I don't want to deal with the surprise ending. Great job and good imagery. Your friend, Cody

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2011

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2011

Hi Cody! Thank you!! HA! You fellas! I love it...this was a nightmare my son had a couple of times when he was around eight? I wound up putting a nitelite in his room after that! We lived in an old house, and he was always scared there. But, thank you again for another wonderful review Cody!! I appreciate your friendship a lot!! ") Susan

Comment from The Stranger

Excellent

is this a personal nightmare or is it somebody facing their final nemesis in a fight to the finish, where only the strongest shall prevail

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 Comment Written 19-Jan-2011

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2011

Hi there! This was a nightmare my son had as a child! I just turned it into an adult having it. I had to finally put a nitelight in his room, we lived in an old scary house, and he was always afraid after dark...? Thank you for being here Stranger. Good to hear from you! Susan

Comment from RKagan

Excellent

Even grownups get scared. I know I have those moments too. This is a well written piece. In just a short paragraph you've done an excellent job of creating suspense and fear. great work.

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2011

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reply by the author on 19-Jan-2011

Hi Roberta! Thank you! I still do, mostly outside, but my son had a dream like this once, so I tried to describe how he felt then. I'm very grateful to have you read for me Roberta! Thanks again!! HUG! Susan