Poems By AnnieDawn
Viewing comments for Chapter 68 "Lovers Tryst"My book of poems and stories
55 total reviews
Comment from Supe
This is very nicely done. A little tryst gone awry. For a minute there I wondered if we needed a warning.....lol A short interlude, well told. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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This is very nicely done. A little tryst gone awry. For a minute there I wondered if we needed a warning.....lol A short interlude, well told. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thank you and thanks for your review also.
Comment from Macsween
Very good I liked it. This was very interesting and well written poem about two people caught in the moment. The words flowed well into each other and I also found it humorous. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Very good I liked it. This was very interesting and well written poem about two people caught in the moment. The words flowed well into each other and I also found it humorous. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thank you and thanks for your review also.
Comment from justmarly
But wait! Do I hear footsteps through the trees?
The maiden quickly buttons up with ease. This tells us she is cheating on her man. So much of this is going on today, thats why there are so many broken hearts and siucide. Its too bad for someone to end their life because of a heartache that in time will heal. Thank you for sharing. JM
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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But wait! Do I hear footsteps through the trees?
The maiden quickly buttons up with ease. This tells us she is cheating on her man. So much of this is going on today, thats why there are so many broken hearts and siucide. Its too bad for someone to end their life because of a heartache that in time will heal. Thank you for sharing. JM
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Not so much cheating but my aim was like maidens of old meeting in the woods with the rich mans son. I guess I could have elaborated but I am learning. Anyway thank you so very much for your review.
Comment from GWinterwin
Good poem with words we can relate to, you might say so close but yet so far. Good word flow and rhyming about almost making love.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Good poem with words we can relate to, you might say so close but yet so far. Good word flow and rhyming about almost making love.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thank you for your review. Just a bit of humor there is all.
Comment from rjuselius
wouldn't it be horrible to get caught. i'm all for sex but maybe they should do it indoors? even though the summer months are so seldom here in finland, then outdoors could be fun.
thank you for sharing!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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wouldn't it be horrible to get caught. i'm all for sex but maybe they should do it indoors? even though the summer months are so seldom here in finland, then outdoors could be fun.
thank you for sharing!
rebekka x
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thanks so much for your review. I appreciate all comments.
Comment from teafor2
AnnieDawn--There is nothing not to like about poetess verse
of couplets: preface, title, theme and verbiage is straight
forward, candid and some a bit raw ("Her hands reach down
to find a hardening cock."), but an excellent rhyme.:) How-
ever, there is nothing, absolutely nothing worst than having
a "Tryst" or fellatio interrupted...I've been told.:) Adult hum-
orous story shared in a poem. Good luck in the contest. teafor2
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
|
AnnieDawn--There is nothing not to like about poetess verse
of couplets: preface, title, theme and verbiage is straight
forward, candid and some a bit raw ("Her hands reach down
to find a hardening cock."), but an excellent rhyme.:) How-
ever, there is nothing, absolutely nothing worst than having
a "Tryst" or fellatio interrupted...I've been told.:) Adult hum-
orous story shared in a poem. Good luck in the contest. teafor2
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thanks so much for your review. I appreciate all comments.
Comment from allborn66
This poem captures the moment well. Was the second stanza supposed to rhyme? I can't imagine a dialect where "breath" and "taste" would. I think you told a story well. The tone is appropriate to the piece.
Barbara
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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This poem captures the moment well. Was the second stanza supposed to rhyme? I can't imagine a dialect where "breath" and "taste" would. I think you told a story well. The tone is appropriate to the piece.
Barbara
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thank you for your review. I do appreciate all comments.
Comment from steevie
This is a lite and fun write. I cold just imagine the panic when two lovers are discovered and make hastily out of there.
Perhaps a little warning of sexual content would be in order here ... just saying ...
steve
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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This is a lite and fun write. I cold just imagine the panic when two lovers are discovered and make hastily out of there.
Perhaps a little warning of sexual content would be in order here ... just saying ...
steve
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEW OF MY POEM. I APPRECIATE ALL COMMENTS THAT I GET.
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You're welcome
steve
Comment from GWHARGIS
It's true the woods have eyes. Liked the passionate build up only to have it ruined by some footsteps. Ah to be young and ever ready for a moment like that. Nice imagery and the rhythm was wonderful. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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It's true the woods have eyes. Liked the passionate build up only to have it ruined by some footsteps. Ah to be young and ever ready for a moment like that. Nice imagery and the rhythm was wonderful. Nicely done.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your review. I am getting all that I was hoping I would get from this poem.
Comment from Norbanus
As often is the case with tales in verse,
your story shows a picture fair and clear.
frustration causes thoughts to muddle worse
On to plan 'B'. As this was just rehearse.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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As often is the case with tales in verse,
your story shows a picture fair and clear.
frustration causes thoughts to muddle worse
On to plan 'B'. As this was just rehearse.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2013
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Ahhhh poetry to review. Thank you that was nice and thank you for your review.