Reviews from

Remembering Yesterday

Viewing comments for Chapter 108 "From One Year Into the Next"
A widow's journey into her relationship with her

19 total reviews 
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
Excellent
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The older the children get the more involved they become with various relationships. Christi seems to be very picky, yet very friendly. She does seem to make friends, easily. Connie seems to be maturing and Don is persevering. Carol sounds like she's content with the building of their house. Evan is a tease. And, you the matriarch observing it all. Very interesting.

Ralf

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Thank you Ralf. I appreciate the review and that you continue to read my story. We all had have both good and bad personality traits, but we keep trying. Somedays we win and some days not so much. That is life.
    Beth
Comment from Sankey
Excellent
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So glad I picked this up this morning. Well done and still good reading. A couple of spags. That seemed (to)be enough of an introduction

Academy, you thought that we [she] should let her go back,

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Thank you Geoffrey. I always appreciate your reviews, and you seem to be finding them with no problem these days.
    Beth
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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I had a car like that when I first starting driving, it was always breaking down. I couldn't afford anything new. Your memories always bring my memories back, Beth. :)) The boyfriends Christi had, I bet she laughs about them now. We always think we know best when we are young. This is another great chapter in your book, my friend, it will be cherrished by your family for generations to come. :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Thank you so much Sandra. I really appreciate your reviews and comments.
    Beth
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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Isn't it great that kids to eventually grow up and are out on their own? Love the story.

You told her as long as she lived under our roof it would be by our rules. (That was always our rule too.)

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Thank you for the review and comments. I so glad you are continuing to enjoy reading my story.
    Beth
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Excellent
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Thrilling--you bring these daughters vividly to life--flighty, flirty Christi--psuedo-JD Connie. Such irony that Christi falls for the one who shuns her.


TYPO: she managed to [OMIT: car] stall her car.


 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Thank you for continuing to read. If the guy had lived closer and we all thought he was wonderful, she wouldn't have fallen for him. She has never married, and she is still looking for Mr. Right. Sorry for the spoiler. Remember, I ruined her life by having Connie.
    Beth
reply by Elizabeth Emerald on 06-Mar-2021
    Given how she flits from one guy to the next, I trust that she didn't spend too long pining after that dick.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I had a curfew on the girls when the were dating or stepping out, even a young girl who boarded with us was under the same, they all kept to the curfew, it seems We were fortunate with the girls. It must have been a worrying time for you and Evan, well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Thank you Roy, I really appreciate the review and comments. Yes, it was a relief when they were on their own. They didn't understand why they had to have a curfew when they were adults. We didn't understand why they were still living with us as adults. LOL
    Beth
reply by royowen on 06-Mar-2021
    It?s very interesting Beth, all are different,
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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Oh my! What a lot of dating issues with all your kids but especially with Christi. So glad she didn't continue with that married guy! And it seems that Kimberly doesn't want to let go of Don. How hard it is to have adult children in your home and to see all the decisions they are making!

She embarrassed her self with him (herself)
when she when knocked on his window and said, "Sir, I was (was there more to this sentence?)

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    This was so full of error. I am embarrassed. I think I've corrected them. Thank you os much for your nice review and for not penalizing me for errors.
    Beth
reply by lyenochka on 06-Mar-2021
    Oh, I make plenty of mistakes myself so I don't see any point in penalizing. It is always easier to see errors in writing we haven't written because we know what we meant to say! 💖
Comment from robyn corum
Good
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Beth,

I am still and ever amazed at your memory! I can't remember YESTERDAY, girl. Wow. This piece was as interesting as all the rest, and definitely reminded me of how raising teens and kids can be such a pain. Ugh.

I was kinda surprised to see so many nits in this one. Made me wonder if you were racing some kind of deadline or not feeling well, or just neglected to check it out before you released it. It's just not like you.

Anyway, I have some notes for you to look over:
1.) We were thankful neither o(f) them (was) hurt seriously.

2.) home of their own and were planning (to) buy new furniture.

3.) when traffic came to (a) stand-still in a tunnel, and she managed to (get her?) car stalled out. She embarrassed (herself) [d-with him] when she [d-when] knocked on his window and said, "Sir, I was (--what? missing something)
--> down in the next paragraph, in the middle of a line is the phrase 'wondering if you could you jump me? -- is that the end to the paragraph and sentence above that got lost?
--> if so, it needs to be moved up AND deleted from where it fell

4.) He gave her (a) strange look and said, "Uh..(.E)xcuse me, Ma(')am?(")
(new paragraph)She blushed and asked if he had jumper cables. (delete this-->) wondering if you could you jump me?"

5.) She cried a lot but, we were pretty sure she wouldn't be grieving long.
--> no comma

6.) Connie had (a) friend named Chris Cramer

7.) You talked to his daddy, once on the phone when he called
--> no comma

8.) 'It's hard to keep up with these boys, and know why they are making long (distance) phone calls.'
--> no comma

9.) coming into his room to clean it and (pick) up his laundry to wash.

10.) unless he would he would be able to come home often.
--> delete one 'he would'

Thanks a bunch - hope this helps~




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 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    This is embarrassing that I made so many errors on this. I should never post anything when I'm trying to read with my eyes giving me so much trouble. I really appreciate your going to all this trouble to help me see the error. I think I've corrected them them. You are so nice to do this for me.
    Beth
reply by robyn corum on 06-Mar-2021
    hahaha Silly girl. That's our job is to help each other!
reply by robyn corum on 06-Mar-2021
    BTW, have you read my hint to increase the size of your screen? Press the 'ctrl' button AND the '+' button at the same time. You can increase it as many times as you want. To decrease it use the '-' button.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Wow! That is amazing. I can't really use that feature. Thank you so much.
    Beth
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Wow! That is amazing. I can't really use that feature. Thank you so much.
    Beth
Comment from Judy Lawless
Excellent
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Another chapter in the tale of raising teenagers. They kept you on edge, I'm sure. I found a bit of editing that needs to be done:

1) "and she managed to car stalled out." - not sure how you meant to phrase this.
2) "Sir, I was"" I would put ellipses at the end to show that the sentence wasn't completed (was ...)
3) "She blushed and asked if he had jumper cables.wondering if you could you jump me?" - this would be more clear and the humour would come through if you quoted her, like so: She blushed and asked, "Do you have jumper cables? Could you jump me?"


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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021


reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021
    Yes I know, I really allowed this one through with a lot of errors. I just corrected about fifteen. I hope I cleaned it will enough. Thank you so much for the review.
    Beth