Tepid Shadows
a Naani poetic form30 total reviews
Comment from QC Poet
The poem seems a little bit dark and gloomy but I'm not familiar with the style of the Naani format. I did enjoy reading this poem offering. Blessings
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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The poem seems a little bit dark and gloomy but I'm not familiar with the style of the Naani format. I did enjoy reading this poem offering. Blessings
Comment Written 27-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Thank you so much.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Naani poetic form
Tepid Shadows
Great entry for the Write a Naani writing prompt contest. I have to try it. It's similar to Japanese poetry. Your poem has good form. You described someone very sick. I love the imagery and descriptive words you used. I can't chose a part, the whole poem is exceptional....
(tepid shadows linger)
in (flaking corners)
where the air is drugged
with the (scent of stale malaise) strong images. Well done!
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Naani poetic form
Tepid Shadows
Great entry for the Write a Naani writing prompt contest. I have to try it. It's similar to Japanese poetry. Your poem has good form. You described someone very sick. I love the imagery and descriptive words you used. I can't chose a part, the whole poem is exceptional....
(tepid shadows linger)
in (flaking corners)
where the air is drugged
with the (scent of stale malaise) strong images. Well done!
Comment Written 27-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Thanks so much, Gypsy!!!
Comment from mermaids
Your use of words appeals to the senses. There is an eery feel to the presence of the shadows. "Where the air is drugged" is a vivid line that makes the reader feels like she is in the poem. Excellent Naani form and use of words.
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Your use of words appeals to the senses. There is an eery feel to the presence of the shadows. "Where the air is drugged" is a vivid line that makes the reader feels like she is in the poem. Excellent Naani form and use of words.
Comment Written 27-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Thanks so much Elaine!!
Comment from MissMerri
I love the creative and unique word choices in this poem and I enjoyed very much the sad and somber mood created, both by the words and by the illustration. "The scent of stale malaise" was particularly striking and stood out for me. I liked this very much. I'm sure this will do well in the naani contest. My best wishes for your success. MM
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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I love the creative and unique word choices in this poem and I enjoyed very much the sad and somber mood created, both by the words and by the illustration. "The scent of stale malaise" was particularly striking and stood out for me. I liked this very much. I'm sure this will do well in the naani contest. My best wishes for your success. MM
Comment Written 27-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Thanks so much Adonna!!
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written Naani poem you have penned for the writing prompt. You used very good descriptive words and very interesting imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. Teri
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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This is a very well written Naani poem you have penned for the writing prompt. You used very good descriptive words and very interesting imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. Teri
Comment Written 26-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Thank you so much, Teri!!
Comment from Patty Palmer
If this kind of poem deals with human relations and current statements then your poem fits the bill. From your words I get it's about an older gentleman who has been sent to a nursing home, and he's feeling lonely and forgotten. The place isn't bright and the light grows dim. The shadows on the wall show the peeling old paint. The musty smell of exhaustion can be smelled throughout the room.
great jobs, I worked in nursing homes and they could be pretty bad.
Patty
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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If this kind of poem deals with human relations and current statements then your poem fits the bill. From your words I get it's about an older gentleman who has been sent to a nursing home, and he's feeling lonely and forgotten. The place isn't bright and the light grows dim. The shadows on the wall show the peeling old paint. The musty smell of exhaustion can be smelled throughout the room.
great jobs, I worked in nursing homes and they could be pretty bad.
Patty
Comment Written 26-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Thanks so much, Patty!!
Comment from Jarvis Popovich
Boy you really know how to bring someone up ;) just kidding. It was a brilliant piece of work. A nice poster. The image is perfect for this poem.
Thank you for writing and sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Boy you really know how to bring someone up ;) just kidding. It was a brilliant piece of work. A nice poster. The image is perfect for this poem.
Thank you for writing and sharing.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2021
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Hello Jarvis, thank you so much for your lovely review!! :)
Comment from Janet Foor
There is a sadness to this Naani poem from the artwork you chose to the very last line. I have never written a naani so I'm not familiar with the requirements but I think you have done a wonderful job with this one.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2021
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There is a sadness to this Naani poem from the artwork you chose to the very last line. I have never written a naani so I'm not familiar with the requirements but I think you have done a wonderful job with this one.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 26-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2021
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Thank you much Janet. :)
Comment from E. Denison
Very strong work here, mystery writer. You do very well to break the lines in natural places, which allows for the poem to have an incredibly smooth read without a rhyme structure. Really well done. Thank you for sharing - best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2021
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Very strong work here, mystery writer. You do very well to break the lines in natural places, which allows for the poem to have an incredibly smooth read without a rhyme structure. Really well done. Thank you for sharing - best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2021
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Thank you very much!
Comment from June Sargent
This is a sad and poignant piece that highlights the lack of real connection in the world these days. Covid did not help! Our lives can just gather dust from lack of interest as we slowly disappear into a state of stale malaise. Well said,
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2021
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This is a sad and poignant piece that highlights the lack of real connection in the world these days. Covid did not help! Our lives can just gather dust from lack of interest as we slowly disappear into a state of stale malaise. Well said,
Comment Written 26-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2021
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Thank you June.
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Thank you June.
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Thank you June.
