Shadow of Death
Joyous occasion, ominous undercurrent30 total reviews
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
Congratulations on Dan and Teri's wedding, and I'm so sorry about the terrible prognosis of Teri's mother. What a bittersweet occasion! I do understand that you have very mixed feelings about grandmotherhood (is that a word?) but a little bundle of love and giggles might brighten the years ahead, in many ways.
You have written this beautifully, and with great sensitivity.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2021
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Congratulations on Dan and Teri's wedding, and I'm so sorry about the terrible prognosis of Teri's mother. What a bittersweet occasion! I do understand that you have very mixed feelings about grandmotherhood (is that a word?) but a little bundle of love and giggles might brighten the years ahead, in many ways.
You have written this beautifully, and with great sensitivity.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2021
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Thankssssss! It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
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You're welcome, my precioussssss! Lol. As bittersweet/poignant as it was, it was certainly a blessing that Teri's mother was there for their wedding. 💒
Yes, I can understand why you would be freaked out at the thought of becoming a grandmother, but honestly, I recommend you embrace it, if possible -- I feel that I have missed out on my opportunity at both motherhood and being a grandmother. I spend as little time as possible dwelling upon it, but it's a reality I just have to live with.
I have befriended a number of people overseas through the modern miracle of technology, and one of them happened to be about 18 years old. When he realized that I was old enough to be his grandmother, he started calling me that! I don't know if it was a tease, or a sign of respect, in his culture, but I didn?t particularly like it, and I have distanced myself from him. I should have just asked him, to begin with, not to call me that. In the beginning, I told him it was alright, but I was being too nice, and he just seemed to take too much delight in it.
I don't mind the ones who call me "Auntie" or "Mother," which I find more reasonable. I don't think I would mind the title "Grandma" if I'd actually earned it, the usual way!
I'm not trying to change your views on the matter, because feelings are what they are, and are not subject to judgment. I'm just sharing my own perspective.
I guess you won't know your ultimate feelings about it, until Teri really has a bun in the oven. It's interesting that this has popped up, right after your article about aging and mortality resurfaced.
Do you think Dan and Teri are secretly (or not so secretly) hoping that her mother will live long enough to see her baby born, as well? I hope, somehow, that she will. I realize that this might not inspire confidence, but I will pray for Teri's mother.
You do know the most common reference to the "Shadow of Death," right? "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for thou art with me ..."
I do know your views on the matter, but how about Dan, Teri and her mother? Just wondering. My heart goes out to you all. You're a very compassionate person, Liz. God bless you, my friend. Love, Mary Kay xoxo
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Oh Liz, a Grandma, my! You will find out it is fantastic. Start a chest for stickers, balloons water pistols, noisy toys and any other fun things that come up on special offer in Walmart - other than this hint I will reveal nothing and leave you to the joy of discovery. So sorry for the undercurrent of sadness at the wedding, but glad you were able to bond well with Teri's mom.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Oh Liz, a Grandma, my! You will find out it is fantastic. Start a chest for stickers, balloons water pistols, noisy toys and any other fun things that come up on special offer in Walmart - other than this hint I will reveal nothing and leave you to the joy of discovery. So sorry for the undercurrent of sadness at the wedding, but glad you were able to bond well with Teri's mom.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
Comment from chocoletdrop052
Like ships passing in the night, we never know what can transpire in the yesterday's of our lives. We recognize the word "Death", but we never recognize what it really means. It is a departure from the soul of a person, the soul is both spirit and flesh. When we bury a person, we say well wishes and we cry tears, but there is something very unique about death. It is a long lasting memory of that person exist to a new reality Let me stop, and just say Thank you
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Like ships passing in the night, we never know what can transpire in the yesterday's of our lives. We recognize the word "Death", but we never recognize what it really means. It is a departure from the soul of a person, the soul is both spirit and flesh. When we bury a person, we say well wishes and we cry tears, but there is something very unique about death. It is a long lasting memory of that person exist to a new reality Let me stop, and just say Thank you
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thank YOU! Bonussssss much appreciated. More important are your heartfelt words--work them into a story or poem! Stop by anytime. Cheers. LIZ
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You know I will be checking up on you. Wonderful Talent
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Thanks for that!
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Your welcome
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Liz,
This is a heart-warming story, and I enjoyed it. There are so many people out there who are hurting, some right next door to us, some 2000 miles away. I know she blessed you when you met. But I bet you blessed her, too. Though she may not be around to see a grandchild, she knows that you will be there. You're a caring soul, and you'll be a strong and loving force for any future grandchildren.
Congratulations to you, and to Teri and Dan as well!
Hugs,
Kimbob
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Hi Liz,
This is a heart-warming story, and I enjoyed it. There are so many people out there who are hurting, some right next door to us, some 2000 miles away. I know she blessed you when you met. But I bet you blessed her, too. Though she may not be around to see a grandchild, she knows that you will be there. You're a caring soul, and you'll be a strong and loving force for any future grandchildren.
Congratulations to you, and to Teri and Dan as well!
Hugs,
Kimbob
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thankssssss! It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
Comment from Paul McFarland
This is a sad one, well told. My niece was married on the same day that her husband's mother died. The mother knew it was going to be a close call and told the young couple to go ahead with the marriage regardless of what might happen.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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This is a sad one, well told. My niece was married on the same day that her husband's mother died. The mother knew it was going to be a close call and told the young couple to go ahead with the marriage regardless of what might happen.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Nice to see you, Paul.
Heartrending story about your niece--did her husband's mother die right before or after the wedding?
It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
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She died the morning of the wedding. Don't worry about becoming a grandparent. It only hurts for a minute. After you get over the "old age" feeling, things will be okay.
Comment from MissMerri
For some reason, this well-written story made me cry. I think there was so much understated emotion in your lines, and so much implied rather than spelled out. It was an amazing little story, obviously true, and that made it all the more touching and beautiful. You are a lovely person. You'd have to be to write something like this. I loved every word. MM
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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For some reason, this well-written story made me cry. I think there was so much understated emotion in your lines, and so much implied rather than spelled out. It was an amazing little story, obviously true, and that made it all the more touching and beautiful. You are a lovely person. You'd have to be to write something like this. I loved every word. MM
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thankssssss! Not only for the bonussssss; more so for your lovely words.
It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
Comment from Judy Lawless
This is a very sad story, Liz. Not your usual, but we all have sorrows we don't often share. It's wonderful that you had some time to get to know Mary. It sounds like it could have been a friendly relationship. Perhaps Teri and Dan are hoping Mary will live to see her grandchild. Miracles do happen. Thanks for sharing. Hugs
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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This is a very sad story, Liz. Not your usual, but we all have sorrows we don't often share. It's wonderful that you had some time to get to know Mary. It sounds like it could have been a friendly relationship. Perhaps Teri and Dan are hoping Mary will live to see her grandchild. Miracles do happen. Thanks for sharing. Hugs
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Thankssssss! It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
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I have a thirteen year old grandson, and a twelve year old great-grandson! Not what you think. The great-grandson a "step". My daughter's husband is twelve years older than she is and it's his grandson. lol
Comment from Sanku
Oh! That is very sad .2000 miles apart.. ! So seeing her would be very difficult. it was wonderful that she could make it to the wedding .A fine wedding under the benign rays of a glorious sun ,but with a shadow of impending loss... I hope and pray that she will have a peaceful time and not much pain ....
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Oh! That is very sad .2000 miles apart.. ! So seeing her would be very difficult. it was wonderful that she could make it to the wedding .A fine wedding under the benign rays of a glorious sun ,but with a shadow of impending loss... I hope and pray that she will have a peaceful time and not much pain ....
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
Comment from Theodore McDowell
A very poignant post and very well written for the occasion of joy with an undercurrent of death. that seems to be the way life is!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope all is well and look forward to your writings as a grandparent.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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A very poignant post and very well written for the occasion of joy with an undercurrent of death. that seems to be the way life is!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope all is well and look forward to your writings as a grandparent.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Thankssssss! It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding. I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Liz,
I'm glad the day was nice for the wedding. As seems to happen so often, a happy occasion is tempered by something not so great. How nice that Mary was able to travel for the wedding. It's sobering to realize that the person you're speaking to you may never speak to again. Life is so short; I guess that's what makes it so precious. I'm wondering how you're going to be as a grandmother. No doubt there will be many more interesting stories told afterwards. Have a blessed day.
Tom
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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Hello Liz,
I'm glad the day was nice for the wedding. As seems to happen so often, a happy occasion is tempered by something not so great. How nice that Mary was able to travel for the wedding. It's sobering to realize that the person you're speaking to you may never speak to again. Life is so short; I guess that's what makes it so precious. I'm wondering how you're going to be as a grandmother. No doubt there will be many more interesting stories told afterwards. Have a blessed day.
Tom
Comment Written 13-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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It was a poignant occasion. Teri was stressed all summer, wondering whether her mother would survive to attend the wedding.
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I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
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I'm freaked out at the idea of becoming a grandmother.
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Well Liz, I don't personally know you, but I bet you're going to be one those grannies that the grandkids will want to spend time with. I have 12 grandchildren and 2 greats. I'm not exactly as old as Moses, but I guess we had health genes and passed them on. Or lust perhaps. Anyway, you'll be great.
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Thanks for your vote of confidence. One thing for sure, visits will be infrequent--my son and his wife (!) live over two hours away and are busy farming--I don't drive--I'll have to cajole my other son to take me every month or so.
