Environment
Caring for our ...16 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your contest entry reads well, Wendy. The presentation is great--the color scheme works, the image is perfect, the formatting of lines, and the rhymes. Your message is loud and clear without being preachy.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
May I suggest [I know your work, your choice.]
Nature needs us to care, but we need her too ...
Master what matters most, be honest and true.
Expertise is needed ... listen, and trust those who heeded
[ with value ]...
Notice the warnings, act, demand change with our voices ...
Thanks and gratitude will follow if we make wise choices.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
Your contest entry reads well, Wendy. The presentation is great--the color scheme works, the image is perfect, the formatting of lines, and the rhymes. Your message is loud and clear without being preachy.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
May I suggest [I know your work, your choice.]
Nature needs us to care, but we need her too ...
Master what matters most, be honest and true.
Expertise is needed ... listen, and trust those who heeded
[ with value ]...
Notice the warnings, act, demand change with our voices ...
Thanks and gratitude will follow if we make wise choices.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
-
Thank you so much for your lovely review, and thoughtfulness and suggestion. I appreciate your time in thinking about it. Did you mean adding "with value" in the third last line? The rest seems to be the same. (I did edit it recently so possibly I changed the words already to be the same as what you suggested!)
Wendy
-
Because it is a rhyming contest acrostic, I thought to replace the last two syl. word in that line with my suggestion. I did like the heeded/needed internal rhyme.
I kno when there's an odd number of lines and one is doing pairs it kinda makes it hard, but I believe having 3 lines end with that rhyme would be better than 1 line with an odd rhyme--of course your choice. 😊
-
Ah yes, I see ... thank you. Yes, I think next time I will ensure I have an even number of letters. I will go back in and see ....
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Caring for our ...
Environment
by Wendy G
Great entry for the Another Acrostic Contest . I agree with you, we must take better care of our planet, for ourselves and for our children. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
Caring for our ...
Environment
by Wendy G
Great entry for the Another Acrostic Contest . I agree with you, we must take better care of our planet, for ourselves and for our children. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
-
Thank you so much for your lovely words and good wishes.
Wendy
Comment from Anne Johnston
Your acrostic on Environment is very well done, describing our responsibility to do our part to take care of our earth. I like the lines:
"Visions of responsibility balanced with care ...
Integrity and wise decisions, being fair."
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
Your acrostic on Environment is very well done, describing our responsibility to do our part to take care of our earth. I like the lines:
"Visions of responsibility balanced with care ...
Integrity and wise decisions, being fair."
Comment Written 15-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
-
Thank you very much Anne. Love your kind and encouraging words.
Wendy
-
You are welcome
Comment from Paul McFarland
Good job, Wendy. Putting in the rhyme along with the acrostic prompt was a good idea. It is tough to manage two prompts, but you did a great job of it.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
Good job, Wendy. Putting in the rhyme along with the acrostic prompt was a good idea. It is tough to manage two prompts, but you did a great job of it.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
-
Thank you Paul. Very kind and encouraging words.
Wendy
Comment from L. Kalere
I always appreciate writings that remind us of our responsibility to nurture and protect the environment. I think you did a great job in touching upon the important points. Great job.
Linda
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
I always appreciate writings that remind us of our responsibility to nurture and protect the environment. I think you did a great job in touching upon the important points. Great job.
Linda
Comment Written 15-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2021
-
Thank you very much for your very encouraging review. Much appreciated. I think, like you, that the environment and our care for it is extremely important.
Wendy
Comment from Boogienights
This is a great acrostic that really spells out what needs to be done to protect our environment. We only have one world and we must step up to protect it. Best of luck to you in the contest. :)
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
This is a great acrostic that really spells out what needs to be done to protect our environment. We only have one world and we must step up to protect it. Best of luck to you in the contest. :)
Comment Written 14-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
-
Thank you very much for an encouraging review, and also for your good wishes.
Comment from Jasminium
Great entry for this contest..and an honest topic ..I love the usage of words in this poem ..also the visuals fit perfectly ..good luck and keep writing..!!
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
Great entry for this contest..and an honest topic ..I love the usage of words in this poem ..also the visuals fit perfectly ..good luck and keep writing..!!
Comment Written 14-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
-
Thank you very much for your review, and kind words. Do you have any suggestions for improving it? (I have just made a few changes here.)
Comment from SimianSavant
Nicely written and formatted. I hate to be a killjoy, but the extra words at the end of your poem are killing your rhymes! I really think your work will be fine without them. Trust the reader to make the connections that these superfluous words are doing. Except for Resilience: *Resilience shown in nature - man needs it also ... so*
See, here you actually need this word to rhyme with the end of the next phrase. So the consistency is lost. How about rhyming with the word "sow"? As in reaping what we sow. This will still rhyme.
Good luck and thanks for the read!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
Nicely written and formatted. I hate to be a killjoy, but the extra words at the end of your poem are killing your rhymes! I really think your work will be fine without them. Trust the reader to make the connections that these superfluous words are doing. Except for Resilience: *Resilience shown in nature - man needs it also ... so*
See, here you actually need this word to rhyme with the end of the next phrase. So the consistency is lost. How about rhyming with the word "sow"? As in reaping what we sow. This will still rhyme.
Good luck and thanks for the read!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
-
Thank you so much for your very honest review and suggestions. This is exactly what I want and need - a reviewer to point out such things. Your review is greatly appreciated and I like your suggestions.
-
You are most welcome!
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Wow, Wendy, a sixer for effort and caring about the environment as you and I do!
There are flaws yes but good points too, I would never fault you for doing your best.
Thanks and gratitude are the watchwords of my life and I am pleased to read that they are the same for you!
Have a wonderful nature filled day!
Jesse
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
Wow, Wendy, a sixer for effort and caring about the environment as you and I do!
There are flaws yes but good points too, I would never fault you for doing your best.
Thanks and gratitude are the watchwords of my life and I am pleased to read that they are the same for you!
Have a wonderful nature filled day!
Jesse
Comment Written 14-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
-
Thank you so much Jesse. I appreciate your review very much, along with the honour of six stars.
Comment from lyenochka
Great message about the need to care for the environment in order for all to be able to in harmony with nature. However, it looks like mutual cooperation across all countries will be hard to accomplish.
Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
Great message about the need to care for the environment in order for all to be able to in harmony with nature. However, it looks like mutual cooperation across all countries will be hard to accomplish.
Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 14-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2021
-
Thank you very much for the lovely review. Yes, cooperation is an essential ingredient for progress int his area. Thank you for your good wishes.