Enshrouding Mists
Rhyming poem32 total reviews
Comment from Luna Darkwaters
Wonderfully done; you captured such a fantastic atmosphere! It creates a sense of urgency in the reader to walk through the area as quickly as they possibly could and the picture only highlights the eerie feelings that this poem gives off.
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
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Wonderfully done; you captured such a fantastic atmosphere! It creates a sense of urgency in the reader to walk through the area as quickly as they possibly could and the picture only highlights the eerie feelings that this poem gives off.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
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Hello there. Thanks so much for the wonderful review and comments. I am delighted you liked this verse. I had written it for a FanStory poetry class in March. Thanks again.
Melissa
Comment from Paul McFarland
Congratulations on your win, Sugarray. A vivid description along with a couple of fine metaphors. I will try to give you more competition next time.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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Congratulations on your win, Sugarray. A vivid description along with a couple of fine metaphors. I will try to give you more competition next time.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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Thanks so very much Paul for your take on this poem. I appreciate your comments.
Melissa
Comment from Contests
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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 A contest winning entry! A seven star rating from the Contest Committee for posting the winning contest entry. |
Comment Written 04-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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Thank you so very much!!! I am honored!
Melissa
Comment from Irish Rain
Oh, I just LOVE this!!!
My type of weather, walk, atmosphere!
I wish I lived somewhere like that!
This is such a pretty poem.
I like all your descriptive words, and
the lovely sense of lonely.
Just beautiful.
Blessings...
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Oh, I just LOVE this!!!
My type of weather, walk, atmosphere!
I wish I lived somewhere like that!
This is such a pretty poem.
I like all your descriptive words, and
the lovely sense of lonely.
Just beautiful.
Blessings...
Comment Written 14-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Hello Judy, thank you for your wonderful thoughts on this misty, gloomy poem. I had fun with it. We are supposed to get a rainy day here in Chester tomorrow, I guess you will too. Thanks again.
Melissa
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I love that type of weather! Loved this poem!!
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Melissa,
Very nice! A terrific entry for the Rhyming poetry contest!
You know, it's like a flash moment in time. I see a senryu in here.
enshrouding mists crawl
shivers shudder 'neath my skin
entombed in fog's gown
You have some nice
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I like the alliteration in your poem,
"shivers shudder"
and,
"gown of gray"
I also like the personification,
"mists begin to crawl"
"Damp, tendril fingers grasp at me"
"fog's sheer gown of gray"
You've done a great job of describing an evil presence in the misty fog of twilight. You can't see it, but you can feel it surrounding you, defeating you, petrifying you. By the time you get home, you'll be a mess... if you get home, that is. Our mind can play tricks on us... if we let it.
This poem is for the senses. It reminded me of a mysterious poem by Walter de la Mare...
https://youtu.be/KgLNwLDlDy4
Good Luck in the contest!
Hugs,
Kimbob
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Hi Melissa,
Very nice! A terrific entry for the Rhyming poetry contest!
You know, it's like a flash moment in time. I see a senryu in here.
enshrouding mists crawl
shivers shudder 'neath my skin
entombed in fog's gown
You have some nice
***********************************
I like the alliteration in your poem,
"shivers shudder"
and,
"gown of gray"
I also like the personification,
"mists begin to crawl"
"Damp, tendril fingers grasp at me"
"fog's sheer gown of gray"
You've done a great job of describing an evil presence in the misty fog of twilight. You can't see it, but you can feel it surrounding you, defeating you, petrifying you. By the time you get home, you'll be a mess... if you get home, that is. Our mind can play tricks on us... if we let it.
This poem is for the senses. It reminded me of a mysterious poem by Walter de la Mare...
https://youtu.be/KgLNwLDlDy4
Good Luck in the contest!
Hugs,
Kimbob
Comment Written 03-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2022
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Thank you, dear sweet KB. So awfully sorry that I have been late in rendering my appreciation for your lovely and exceptional review. Hope you have had a lovely Easter.
Melissa
Comment from Pantygynt
I am so pleased for you that this poem hgas been so well received and by so many writers here for whom I hold a deep respect. A truly excellent piece.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2022
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I am so pleased for you that this poem hgas been so well received and by so many writers here for whom I hold a deep respect. A truly excellent piece.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2022
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Thank you so much Jim for your comments and for your continuing contribution to my writing in class and reviews. You truly encourage me and I appreciate your presence here on FS... I know many others feel the same way. You have a gift for teaching :)
Melissa
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Thank you for that.
Comment from poetwatch
Melissa, I find the world where you do wander a bit strange. :) For a minute I thought that Edger was going to let the raven loose. I like the way you spin your yard and trap the reader in your web. :) This is a very good entry for the Rhyming Poetry Contest.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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Melissa, I find the world where you do wander a bit strange. :) For a minute I thought that Edger was going to let the raven loose. I like the way you spin your yard and trap the reader in your web. :) This is a very good entry for the Rhyming Poetry Contest.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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Hi Jose. Yes, I spun a creepy web to trap you in as the misty fingers reach out to grab and prod. Hahaha... you have me going. Thanks so much for your wonderful review.
Melissa
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I love your image choice, Melissa. Your words are super, too. The rhymes are perfect, the words create great imagery, and the message is clear how the one in the poem feels about himself/herself based on the word isolation.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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I love your image choice, Melissa. Your words are super, too. The rhymes are perfect, the words create great imagery, and the message is clear how the one in the poem feels about himself/herself based on the word isolation.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 02-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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Hi Jan... thanks so very much for your wonderful review. Yes, the isolation is the theme... but I had to throw in a little bit of creepy too. LOL
Melissa
Comment from jessizero
Congratulations on having this piece recognized! It was written beautifully. I can almost imagine the chill of the mist. Thank you for sharing this. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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Congratulations on having this piece recognized! It was written beautifully. I can almost imagine the chill of the mist. Thank you for sharing this. Best wishes.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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Thanks so much Jess!!
Melissa
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
The picture you painted in well chosen words was so clear that I found the poem outstanding. Your imagery was wonderful, as were you meter and rhyme. I wish you luck in the contest.--Hope others agree with me.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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The picture you painted in well chosen words was so clear that I found the poem outstanding. Your imagery was wonderful, as were you meter and rhyme. I wish you luck in the contest.--Hope others agree with me.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2022
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Hi there Verna. Thank you for encouraging me in my writing. I am delighted you liked the poem!! Thanks so much!
Melissa
