Chasing Butterflies
Future Flash Fiction for the Contest10 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
June,
This is a well told apocolytic story that may come to be if we don't work on stop the effects of global warming. I like the irony at the end when the person said a butterfly was seen for the first time. So in a way they were chasing butterflies.
Congrats on the honorable mention in the contast.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2022
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June,
This is a well told apocolytic story that may come to be if we don't work on stop the effects of global warming. I like the irony at the end when the person said a butterfly was seen for the first time. So in a way they were chasing butterflies.
Congrats on the honorable mention in the contast.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 22-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2022
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Thank you! I wanted to write fiction, based on facts. And it is a sad reality that cannot be ignored - our planet will not survive if we stay on the course we're on. But I wanted to end it on a positive note. I appreciate your sharing your insightful comments.
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No problem, June. You are so right..
Joan
Comment from lyenochka
Good parallel with the remaining rain forest struggling to survive and also the last of this tribe, also struggling to survive. But I was a little worried about using the local wood as that meant more trees were downed. Hope no one else decides to join them to make a new concrete jungle!
Congratulations on your Honorable Mention!
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2022
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Good parallel with the remaining rain forest struggling to survive and also the last of this tribe, also struggling to survive. But I was a little worried about using the local wood as that meant more trees were downed. Hope no one else decides to join them to make a new concrete jungle!
Congratulations on your Honorable Mention!
Comment Written 19-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2022
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Thank you! Maybe he used dead trees???
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That's a good solution! 😊
Comment from juliaSjames
A compelling write, June
I like the comparison between the two jungles. The butterfly as a symbol of the resilience of nature is a fitting way to end.
"60% of the rainforest was destroyed by the year 2030. Today the landscape in Amazonia is similar to that of the Saharan desert"
I know it's FFF but something doesn't track here. Perhaps dial back the comparison? I'm thinking the oasis image would work. Oases of trees in a wasted land.
Best of luck in the contest
Stay safe and blessed
Hugs Julia
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A compelling write, June
I like the comparison between the two jungles. The butterfly as a symbol of the resilience of nature is a fitting way to end.
"60% of the rainforest was destroyed by the year 2030. Today the landscape in Amazonia is similar to that of the Saharan desert"
I know it's FFF but something doesn't track here. Perhaps dial back the comparison? I'm thinking the oasis image would work. Oases of trees in a wasted land.
Best of luck in the contest
Stay safe and blessed
Hugs Julia
Comment Written 13-Apr-2022
Comment from karenina
This is a compelling read! Mankind isn't getting hip to the game here... Mother Nature could well be aporoaching zero hour...
Will we wake up before it is too late?
You left with a hopeful line...
I pray there are butterflies remaining too chase!
Karenina
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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This is a compelling read! Mankind isn't getting hip to the game here... Mother Nature could well be aporoaching zero hour...
Will we wake up before it is too late?
You left with a hopeful line...
I pray there are butterflies remaining too chase!
Karenina
Comment Written 13-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Man cannot afford to remain apathetic or indifferent to the issues affecting the environment. Otherwise this piece of fiction can turn into reality someday soon. Thanks for sharing your insights.
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I agree. Tragically, I agree...
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
June,
Your pride is very powerful. You paint a future of what may happen to man if we don't stop poisoning our environment or wasting our natural resources.
How terrible this world would be!
Great future flash fiction, June.
Blessings,
Cindy
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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June,
Your pride is very powerful. You paint a future of what may happen to man if we don't stop poisoning our environment or wasting our natural resources.
How terrible this world would be!
Great future flash fiction, June.
Blessings,
Cindy
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Man cannot afford to remain apathetic or indifferent to the issues affecting the environment. Otherwise this piece of fiction can turn into reality someday soon. Thanks for sharing your insights.
Comment from kahpot
What an excellent read, yes all the beauty will become concrete if things don't change for our future existence, very well written with a message that all should read, best wishes for your contest****kahpot
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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What an excellent read, yes all the beauty will become concrete if things don't change for our future existence, very well written with a message that all should read, best wishes for your contest****kahpot
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Man cannot afford to remain apathetic or indifferent to the issues affecting the environment. Otherwise this piece of fiction can turn into reality someday soon. Thanks for sharing your insights.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job with your contest entry, June. I enjoyed reading it.
You story had good organization and great details. Both created great imagery as I read, I could picture everything. I like the last line about never quit chasing butterflies. It is fitting with all the changes that happened in your story. Butterflies could be like dreams.
Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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You did a great job with your contest entry, June. I enjoyed reading it.
You story had good organization and great details. Both created great imagery as I read, I could picture everything. I like the last line about never quit chasing butterflies. It is fitting with all the changes that happened in your story. Butterflies could be like dreams.
Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Man cannot afford to remain apathetic or indifferent to the issues affecting the environment. Otherwise this piece of fiction can turn into reality someday soon. Thanks for sharing your insights.
Comment from BethShelby
It seems in most of the future stories I've read, people aren't seeing a very bright future for our world. All the rainforest are gone and even the tribes who lived there. How sad. Ah... but there is one small ray of hope. One member has survived and he about to be a father. Not only does he see some beauty in a spot but he also sees a butterfly. He remembers the promise to keep chasing butterflies. There is hope after all. Nice story.
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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It seems in most of the future stories I've read, people aren't seeing a very bright future for our world. All the rainforest are gone and even the tribes who lived there. How sad. Ah... but there is one small ray of hope. One member has survived and he about to be a father. Not only does he see some beauty in a spot but he also sees a butterfly. He remembers the promise to keep chasing butterflies. There is hope after all. Nice story.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2022
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Man cannot afford to remain apathetic or indifferent to the issues affecting the environment. Otherwise this piece of fiction can turn into reality someday soon. Thanks for sharing your insights.
Comment from jessizero
I don't think I want to live in a future like that, but it is not too far-fetched. Never stop chasing butterflies! Thank you for sharing this here. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2022
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I don't think I want to live in a future like that, but it is not too far-fetched. Never stop chasing butterflies! Thank you for sharing this here. Best wishes.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2022
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I know what you mean. If man doesn't change his ways, we will suffer the consequences - the entire planet will. Thank you for reading this piece of fiction that may very well turn into fact. Your feedback is appreciated.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This is an excellent story, June, not least because of the last line. There are so many meanings of the phrase chasing butterflies, and it is entralling imagining which twist in the tail of the tale could be in operation. Perhaps one day after the contest is over, you will expand this into a more developed story. That would be fine! Kate xx
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2022
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This is an excellent story, June, not least because of the last line. There are so many meanings of the phrase chasing butterflies, and it is entralling imagining which twist in the tail of the tale could be in operation. Perhaps one day after the contest is over, you will expand this into a more developed story. That would be fine! Kate xx
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2022
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If man doesn't change his ways, we will suffer the consequences - the entire planet will. Thank you for reading this piece of fiction that may very well turn into fact someday. I am glad it resonated with you and appreciate the positive feedback.
