Remembering Yesterday
Viewing comments for Chapter 155 "The Fall of 1995"A widow's journey into her relationship with her
18 total reviews
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
I enjoyed reading this post very much.
I find it touching that your intention is to show your children how strong and loving your relationship with your husband was before having children. That is a beautiful gift to them.
reply by the author on 04-May-2022
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I enjoyed reading this post very much.
I find it touching that your intention is to show your children how strong and loving your relationship with your husband was before having children. That is a beautiful gift to them.
Comment Written 04-May-2022
reply by the author on 04-May-2022
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Thank you so much for reading my chapter and commenting on it. I'm so glad you liked it.
Beth
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Of course, I know the objective of writing this non-fiction, as if you are talking to your deceased husband, here you are remembering your yesterday, how you managed to live days with the inevitable ups and downs in the world of the Shelbys, particularly about the fall of 1995; lively expressed; well said, well done; post god speed more; positively encouraging editing, negatively not wording, forgiving errors of theist-good authors-writers. ALCREATOR LITT DEAR (D R)
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Of course, I know the objective of writing this non-fiction, as if you are talking to your deceased husband, here you are remembering your yesterday, how you managed to live days with the inevitable ups and downs in the world of the Shelbys, particularly about the fall of 1995; lively expressed; well said, well done; post god speed more; positively encouraging editing, negatively not wording, forgiving errors of theist-good authors-writers. ALCREATOR LITT DEAR (D R)
Comment Written 03-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you again for an excellent review. I do appreciate your comments.
Beth
Comment from lyenochka
What a hard time overall. I'm so sorry about the hurt you must have felt from Carol's journal revelations. I think sometimes moms are the psychological "punching bags" - because we are safe targets. First born kids often do feel more pressure and Carol did rise up to the challenge of caring for the twins even during her college years.
Did Jane's condition every get diagnosed? I hope Kimberly doesn't have whatever her mother had.
but that only took care (But) as this was the start of a new sentence.
some phycological issues and acting irrationally, (psychological)
Stray words at the end of your notes: 's parents
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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What a hard time overall. I'm so sorry about the hurt you must have felt from Carol's journal revelations. I think sometimes moms are the psychological "punching bags" - because we are safe targets. First born kids often do feel more pressure and Carol did rise up to the challenge of caring for the twins even during her college years.
Did Jane's condition every get diagnosed? I hope Kimberly doesn't have whatever her mother had.
but that only took care (But) as this was the start of a new sentence.
some phycological issues and acting irrationally, (psychological)
Stray words at the end of your notes: 's parents
Comment Written 03-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you Helen. The instructors at this place had all 40 or so people there that session write letters to give to their parents, telling them what a screwed up job they had done of raising them. It did make me a little angry at the time, because I felt so misunderstood. My poor husband took it so seriously and kept apologizing. I got past it. I figured I probably misjudged my own parents' motives as well. That what kids do. I don't know if Jane was ever officially diagnosed, but she did some much worse things later, and now none of her children nor grandchildren will go near her. I think she may have passed on bipolar tendencies to Kimberly. So far, I've not seen that in my grandchildren.
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Glad you were able to see through it the message and have a good relationship with your children now. I think some psycho-babblers cause more trouble and healing.
Comment from Ben Colder
Our children can be something of a surprise. My youngest daughter of three was a handful. Much like yours. She was mad at the fact she needed to study and graduate with honors and she went wild and told me I was not her father and she was adopted. Her mother and I found it to be hilarious. I know beyond the shadow of a doubt, that Evan was a great guy. Good one, Beth
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Our children can be something of a surprise. My youngest daughter of three was a handful. Much like yours. She was mad at the fact she needed to study and graduate with honors and she went wild and told me I was not her father and she was adopted. Her mother and I found it to be hilarious. I know beyond the shadow of a doubt, that Evan was a great guy. Good one, Beth
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you Chuck. I appreciate your comments. Those kids change their minds about the way they saw things over time. I've changed my own mind about some of the attitudes I had toward my own parents.
I appreciate the stars.
Beth
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I was about sixty before realizing my dad was not stupid as I thought he was. LOL.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job with this chapter, Beth, the details were awesome. You gave each family member some space and even the in laws. That house fire sounded iffy to me. Why did Jane remove some articles before hand--like she knew something??? I believe Carol likes the drama that surrounds most everything she says or does. I believe she may have even conveniently added info in the journal from being prodded by the professionals. I remember she didn't help with the care of a relative in one of your earlier chapters.
Connie and Charlie were constantly at [ delete at ] arguing over something
Since Jane had shown signs of having some phychological [psychological ] issues
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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You did a great job with this chapter, Beth, the details were awesome. You gave each family member some space and even the in laws. That house fire sounded iffy to me. Why did Jane remove some articles before hand--like she knew something??? I believe Carol likes the drama that surrounds most everything she says or does. I believe she may have even conveniently added info in the journal from being prodded by the professionals. I remember she didn't help with the care of a relative in one of your earlier chapters.
Connie and Charlie were constantly at [ delete at ] arguing over something
Since Jane had shown signs of having some phychological [psychological ] issues
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you Jan, I really appreciate the review and comments. Carol claimed she didn't like drama but she certainly seemed to have a lot going on back then. She was feeling sorry for herself because her marriage didn't workout and was looking for someone to blame. I think Jane burned her house because things that have happened since that time show mental problems, and at the time, she was in trouble money wise. Now none of her children will speak to her. It's sad, but she done some even more stupid things since then.
Beth
Comment from Ulla
Oh it's so true Beth. We think we have done our best and then we get a wake-up call from our child who sees us in a totally different light. I certainly know what you're saying. As you know I so enjoy this. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 02-May-2022
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Oh it's so true Beth. We think we have done our best and then we get a wake-up call from our child who sees us in a totally different light. I certainly know what you're saying. As you know I so enjoy this. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 02-May-2022
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Thank you, Ulla. Thankfully she claims she does see it that was any more. She had been around a lot of people that had much worse lives than her. They don't come with instructions, so we do the best we can hope they get past blaming us for everything that goes wrong in their life.
Beth
Comment from Judy Lawless
Wow, I can't believe the things Carol told her instructor about her childhood, Beth! That must have been heartbreaking to read. You certainly had some trying times in your family. By this time one would hope they'd all been settled in their own lives. Well written. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Wow, I can't believe the things Carol told her instructor about her childhood, Beth! That must have been heartbreaking to read. You certainly had some trying times in your family. By this time one would hope they'd all been settled in their own lives. Well written. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you Judy. She wanted me to see what she'd written but later she saw things differently and decided her life hadn't been so bad after all. She was in a bad place because of her divorce.
Beth
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You're most welcome, Beth. I'm glad to hear Carol had a change of heart. :)
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
It comes as a shock to realise what you thought your were doing right, wasn't what your children think. I wonder if we're all like that. There was a lot going on in this chapter, Beth. I can understand why Jane was angry, but it was up to Kimberly to have told her, not Don. What a shock to have your home burnt to the ground! I wonder if she was responsible. Hmm! Well done, Beth, another very interesting chapter of your life. :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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It comes as a shock to realise what you thought your were doing right, wasn't what your children think. I wonder if we're all like that. There was a lot going on in this chapter, Beth. I can understand why Jane was angry, but it was up to Kimberly to have told her, not Don. What a shock to have your home burnt to the ground! I wonder if she was responsible. Hmm! Well done, Beth, another very interesting chapter of your life. :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you Sandra. I'm pretty sure Jane did set the fire because she was in some financial trouble over a bad real estate deal and she is nuts. Now none of her children will go near her. If I ever put this in print, I need to leave that episode out. My daughter thinks differently now than she did back then. I guess we all see things in a different light over time. I really appreciate your review.
Beth
Comment from Spitfire
Your life reads like a soap opera. You should try to sell it to one of the networks. The house fire does sound suspicious! And then Carol's accusing you for the personality quirks she's exhibit. I get feedback from my children sometime putting blame on me. Guess it comes with the territory. But I can see how my son and his wife have made their children very spoiled and demanding. My son admitted they made mistakes and hoped that life's trials would straighten them out.
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Your life reads like a soap opera. You should try to sell it to one of the networks. The house fire does sound suspicious! And then Carol's accusing you for the personality quirks she's exhibit. I get feedback from my children sometime putting blame on me. Guess it comes with the territory. But I can see how my son and his wife have made their children very spoiled and demanding. My son admitted they made mistakes and hoped that life's trials would straighten them out.
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you for the review and comments. My daughter shocked me but she was in a bad place after her divorce. It was common for everyone to blame the parents. I'm pretty sure Jane did burn her house. She was in some financial trouble with bad real estate deal. She gone so far over the edge now, none of children will talk to her.
Beth
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I do enjoy reading your memoirs. I understand that our grown children view our parenting skills much different than we did. I just haven't figured out why.
Since Jane had had shown signs of having some psysiological issues (too many 'had' & physiological)
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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I do enjoy reading your memoirs. I understand that our grown children view our parenting skills much different than we did. I just haven't figured out why.
Since Jane had had shown signs of having some psysiological issues (too many 'had' & physiological)
Comment Written 02-May-2022
reply by the author on 03-May-2022
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Thank you so much for the review. Thinking back to my own childhood, I realize I saw my life in a different light than the way my parents viewed it. None of us are perfect parents and a few years ago it was the general opinion of all these self-help groups the parent were always to blame for any problem a child might have.
I think they've grown up a little more and see things differently now.
