Reviews from

Heartbeats

Love poem

3 total reviews 
Comment from LisaMay
Excellent
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Aaah... I remember those days of peaceful sleep, my cheek beside my lover's heartbeat. Now, like you, it's boring old sheep that accompany us to bed where we restlessly toss and turn all by our lonesome selves.

 Comment Written 16-May-2022


reply by the author on 16-May-2022
    My favourite cat used to snuggle in my bosom at night and I could hear his heartbeat.. it was such a cosy feeling.

    Now I too am just left with sheep to count. ( sigh)

    Glad my wee poem brought back warm memories.

    When the contest is done , I m going to edit and put cheeks* instead of heads.. the sound is far more smooth.

    Your review was helpful , thanks!

    Keep safe!

reply by LisaMay on 16-May-2022
    Cheeks on chest does sound better - the alliteration works well and 'cheeks' fits with 'heartbeats'. Glad I mentioned it!
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
    Me too !

    It?s also the more appropriate word .( biggrin)

    Keep safe!

Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
Excellent
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You achieved a lot in this 15 or less love poem. Kudos to you. I enjoyed it. Of course, I would have liked more, but it is a good piece of writing despite the restraints. Thank you for sharing and good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 16-May-2022


reply by the author on 16-May-2022
    Hello , thank you for the kind review.

    My favourite format is 5-7-5 or less.

    I like the challenge to create a feeling with very few words. ( biggrin)

    Keep safe!

reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 16-May-2022
    Check out my poem on this site called Keep Hope Alive.
Comment from Fleedleflump
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You conjure a lovely image of togetherness, snuggled and nuzzled, fused as one nestled in the covers. It's a perfect sensation and a wonderful way to head into sleep. I very much enjoyed your love poem.

Mike

 Comment Written 16-May-2022


reply by the author on 16-May-2022
    Thank you so much for the lovely review. I'm glad that my wee poem delighted you.

    I count sheep now but I used to have a cat that snuggled on my chest/bosom and I could hear his heart beat ...it was a very cosy feeling . I miss that.

    Keep safe!