Above Us
a poem10 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
You have lovely alliteration in this poem. Your use of words with w's & s's effect the wind and wings. I love the expression gliding gracefully. The reader will have cause to pause. It is a lovely image.
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
You have lovely alliteration in this poem. Your use of words with w's & s's effect the wind and wings. I love the expression gliding gracefully. The reader will have cause to pause. It is a lovely image.
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
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Thank you, Liz
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***you're welcome***
Comment from Lloyd T. Okoko
Congratulations for sharing a writing prompt compliant "use these words" post.
The objective correlative of your work reminisces an undaunted falcon's flight against prevailing oddities of rainfall.
The work highlights the protagonist's sight of the flying falcon; its locales above the earth and how it dares the oddities of the prevailing rainfall.
The work earns its texture through its effective use of imagery.
Excellent work. Bravo.
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
Congratulations for sharing a writing prompt compliant "use these words" post.
The objective correlative of your work reminisces an undaunted falcon's flight against prevailing oddities of rainfall.
The work highlights the protagonist's sight of the flying falcon; its locales above the earth and how it dares the oddities of the prevailing rainfall.
The work earns its texture through its effective use of imagery.
Excellent work. Bravo.
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
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Thank you, Lloyd, for the exceptional review.
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Remain Blessed.
Comment from Carolyn Dooley
The falcon is a bird not often seen where I live. Actually I have not seen any at all. I enjoyed reading your poem. And I like the picture. Thank you for sharing this poem.
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
The falcon is a bird not often seen where I live. Actually I have not seen any at all. I enjoyed reading your poem. And I like the picture. Thank you for sharing this poem.
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
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Thank you, Carolyn, for the great review.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Erika Seshadri
What a lovely, serene poem. This makes me want to go outside and birdwatch. But later, when it's not 95 degrees, lol. Great use of the required words. Best of luck in the contest.
Cheers!
Erika
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
What a lovely, serene poem. This makes me want to go outside and birdwatch. But later, when it's not 95 degrees, lol. Great use of the required words. Best of luck in the contest.
Cheers!
Erika
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
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Thank you, Erika
Comment from GARY MACLEAN
I'm gathering, "moistening eyes" because of being awed by the wonder of it all? One small part of God's marvelous creation and it can marvel any of us. And he did it over and over again.
Very nice
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
I'm gathering, "moistening eyes" because of being awed by the wonder of it all? One small part of God's marvelous creation and it can marvel any of us. And he did it over and over again.
Very nice
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
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Thank you, Gary
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
Bill,
Your work has a graceful sound in describing this majestic bird.
Very nice photo.
I like your subject's stoic personality, as he glided through the rain unaffected.
Great work, Bill.
Good luck with all your writing.
Cindy
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
Bill,
Your work has a graceful sound in describing this majestic bird.
Very nice photo.
I like your subject's stoic personality, as he glided through the rain unaffected.
Great work, Bill.
Good luck with all your writing.
Cindy
Comment Written 21-May-2022
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Thank you, Cindy, for the kind review.
Comment from Fleedleflump
There's a lovely sense of carefree freedom I your descriptions, accentuating the idea of drifting above the world, not needing to worry about things. I liked this very much.
Mike
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
There's a lovely sense of carefree freedom I your descriptions, accentuating the idea of drifting above the world, not needing to worry about things. I liked this very much.
Mike
Comment Written 20-May-2022
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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Thank you, Mike
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Thank you, Mike
Comment from LisaMay
I love watching falcons here in New Zealand, so I enjoyed your poem and that terrific photo very much. You've used all the words effectively.
I'm wondering whether the 'moistening eyes' are due to the rain or because of a sense of awe at such a lovely sight... maybe both.
(I think a 'wedge' shape more correctly describes the tail than wings.)
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
I love watching falcons here in New Zealand, so I enjoyed your poem and that terrific photo very much. You've used all the words effectively.
I'm wondering whether the 'moistening eyes' are due to the rain or because of a sense of awe at such a lovely sight... maybe both.
(I think a 'wedge' shape more correctly describes the tail than wings.)
Comment Written 20-May-2022
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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I actually wrote the poem then looked for the bird. This photo seemed accurate then.
Comment from Jumbo J
Hi,
There is such a calming presence created within your chosen words. You captured the true essence of you and your subject.
A very nicely presented and composed poem using all the words provided very well.
I enjoyed the read, thank you for sharing your art.
All the very best in this contest.
With our thoughts we create...
sounds of silence.
Kind regards,
James.
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
Hi,
There is such a calming presence created within your chosen words. You captured the true essence of you and your subject.
A very nicely presented and composed poem using all the words provided very well.
I enjoyed the read, thank you for sharing your art.
All the very best in this contest.
With our thoughts we create...
sounds of silence.
Kind regards,
James.
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Thank you, James
Comment from jessizero
You created a lovely image with these supplied words. You chose your own words well, also. "Moistening eyes" is a nice phrase. Thank you for sharing this here.
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
You created a lovely image with these supplied words. You chose your own words well, also. "Moistening eyes" is a nice phrase. Thank you for sharing this here.
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Thank you, Jessizero