Heart Crafted Poems - 2022
Viewing comments for Chapter 46 "Flash of Lightning"Musings of an old man - 2022
24 total reviews
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
Thank goodness for the explanation below the poem because as I read, I thought this reads as two poems. It's cleverly done. It reads well now that you have identified this poetry form. I probably in the last stanza would identify she as...an old woman or as a runaway. Identifying she
rather than leaving it generic adds an extra layer.
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Thank goodness for the explanation below the poem because as I read, I thought this reads as two poems. It's cleverly done. It reads well now that you have identified this poetry form. I probably in the last stanza would identify she as...an old woman or as a runaway. Identifying she
rather than leaving it generic adds an extra layer.
Comment Written 21-May-2022
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Sandra, thank you. I appreciate your thought process. My feeling was the she could also be the hawk ... or it could be an old woman a blooming teenager. Smiling back!
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Yes, it could be the hawk too. However, I feel it's more interesting being something else impacted by the same event. You are most welcome. Please consider reading some of my poems in my portfolio.
Comment from dragonpoet
JLR,
This is a well done puente with the single line a bridge between nature's and human nature's response to storms both literally and figuratively. Interesting, apt, but a bit spooky, artwork.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Joan
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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JLR,
This is a well done puente with the single line a bridge between nature's and human nature's response to storms both literally and figuratively. Interesting, apt, but a bit spooky, artwork.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Joan
Comment Written 21-May-2022
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Joan, thank you. I thought the graphic was a good representation of the storm for mother hawk and the stormy revery of thoughts, for the she hawk or ... the old woman or pensive teenager.
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You're welcome, JLR.
Joan
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The way the second staight tree and the curved part of the secont tree meet I think it looks like the the letter K.
If you look hard the trees could read I kill? Describing a very bad storm.
Joan
Comment from Fleedleflump
Well, that's quite a form and not one I've encountered before. I read the poem before the explanation, which was good as I wasn't trying to analyse the composition. Instead, I really enjoyed it. This is a lovely piece about both nature and maternal instincts with some effective descriptions of the squall and the determination to see it through.
Excellent piece.
Mike
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reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Well, that's quite a form and not one I've encountered before. I read the poem before the explanation, which was good as I wasn't trying to analyse the composition. Instead, I really enjoyed it. This is a lovely piece about both nature and maternal instincts with some effective descriptions of the squall and the determination to see it through.
Excellent piece.
Mike
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-May-2022
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Mike, Thank you this was a fun prompt!
Comment from Pantygynt
I saw these were the latest prompt on the potlatch club yesterday, but this is the first entry I have read. You use the idea of the puente (bridge) well here linking the two apparently different subjects but I couldn't help wondering if the 'She' of the final stanza was in fact the 'Hawk' of the first. I seemed to me thaat it could be.
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reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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I saw these were the latest prompt on the potlatch club yesterday, but this is the first entry I have read. You use the idea of the puente (bridge) well here linking the two apparently different subjects but I couldn't help wondering if the 'She' of the final stanza was in fact the 'Hawk' of the first. I seemed to me thaat it could be.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-May-2022
reply by the author on 21-May-2022
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Yes ... however, one could consider --she as simply a woman lost in thought also experiencing her own stormy life.
I love that the synergy brings the hawk to the forefront of the poem.
This was a fun prompt and new poetic style for me.
