The lion
my father22 total reviews
Comment from John Ciarmello
This is by far the most beautiful thing I have read today--what a tribute to our Father's in heaven. The comparable reference to both (F) fathers is what sets this piece apart. I loved it! Well done! Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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This is by far the most beautiful thing I have read today--what a tribute to our Father's in heaven. The comparable reference to both (F) fathers is what sets this piece apart. I loved it! Well done! Best, JohnC
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much John for the wonderful review:) I wish you a wonderful day and thank you for taking a chance on reading this piece:) My dads will be always special no matter where they are
Comment from Shirley McLain
What a wonderful tribute to your father and his valiant fight against his cancer. You did a great job, and I didn't see any errors. Good luck in the contest. Shirley
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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What a wonderful tribute to your father and his valiant fight against his cancer. You did a great job, and I didn't see any errors. Good luck in the contest. Shirley
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much Shirley for the review and the good luck wishes
Comment from Terry Broxson
A beautiful and creative story/prayer you have entered into this contest, good luck. The memories you revive are rich with pathos and imagery for your reader. Outstanding work. I wish I had another six. Terry.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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A beautiful and creative story/prayer you have entered into this contest, good luck. The memories you revive are rich with pathos and imagery for your reader. Outstanding work. I wish I had another six. Terry.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Hi Terry thank you in advance for your virtual six:) and mostly thank you so much for taking a chance on this piece, my dad was indeed special
Comment from Carolyn Dooley
This was a great story to read. A son and his father. Your father was a great man. One who taught you many things in life. You were lucky to have such a dad. One that loved you and wanted the best for you. Thank you for sharing this great post.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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This was a great story to read. A son and his father. Your father was a great man. One who taught you many things in life. You were lucky to have such a dad. One that loved you and wanted the best for you. Thank you for sharing this great post.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Hi Carolyn thank you so much for this wonderful review, indeed despite everything what happened in my life, I was lucky
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Yes, you were lucky. And you are welcome.
Comment from royowen
I have two daughters, they have given me much joy with the addition of five grandchildren, love is expandable, one cannot have too much love in their lives, love has no limit or capacity, it. This is a beautifully written tribute to your loving father, I know how he feels, I adore my girls, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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I have two daughters, they have given me much joy with the addition of five grandchildren, love is expandable, one cannot have too much love in their lives, love has no limit or capacity, it. This is a beautifully written tribute to your loving father, I know how he feels, I adore my girls, blessings Roy
Comment Written 16-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Hi Roy :) you are so blessed to have such a loving and wonderful family:) Thank you for your wonderful review
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Thank you
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Your prayer is interesting, but at times you seem to be talking to God and calling him your father, but God doesn't get cancer, also I don't think you know if your teacher prayed about you or if she told your parents how well you could read. You might want to reread this and add a few more words to make it more understandable.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Your prayer is interesting, but at times you seem to be talking to God and calling him your father, but God doesn't get cancer, also I don't think you know if your teacher prayed about you or if she told your parents how well you could read. You might want to reread this and add a few more words to make it more understandable.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Thank you got you for your review and the suggestions:)
Comment from Bridge
A beautiful story that touches the heart. I'm so sorry for your loss. You were lucky to have each other. Thanks for sharing . All the best to you in the contest.
With regards
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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A beautiful story that touches the heart. I'm so sorry for your loss. You were lucky to have each other. Thanks for sharing . All the best to you in the contest.
With regards
Comment Written 16-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much for your kind review, and indeed I was lucky to have him in my life
Comment from Richard Melnick
Magnificent. A superb homage to your Father, a true blessing on Earth from God above. A moving piece. Your Dad is at peace, watching over you, guiding your hand, easing your mind. Amen.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Magnificent. A superb homage to your Father, a true blessing on Earth from God above. A moving piece. Your Dad is at peace, watching over you, guiding your hand, easing your mind. Amen.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much Richard for your encouraging review and kindness
Comment from Wendy G
Your father is obviously very much loved and you had some special and wonderful times together. He gave you many gifts: reading, learning, understanding and appreciating the worlds of imagination, literature, and the joy of movement in all its forms. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Your father is obviously very much loved and you had some special and wonderful times together. He gave you many gifts: reading, learning, understanding and appreciating the worlds of imagination, literature, and the joy of movement in all its forms. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much Wendy for your kind and encouraging review
Comment from Fleedleflump
This is beautiful - I can feel that strong bond you had with your father, and the huge love you still hold for him. I hope you don't mind, but I made some notes as I was reading that I think will strengthen it:
'you were the one that open the library' - 'open' should be 'opened'
'the words I didn't understood.' - 'understood' should be 'understand'
'thirst of adventure' - 'of' should be 'for'
'I remember, that before' - unnecessary comma.
'You taught me to swim and showed me that strange fascination' - I don't think this quite says what you mean. Perhaps: 'You taught me to swim and inspired in me a strong fascination'
'so we can visit the world together' - 'can' should be 'could'
'you fought like a lion and give me three more precious years' - 'give' should be 'gave'
I hope that helps.
Mike
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2022
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This is beautiful - I can feel that strong bond you had with your father, and the huge love you still hold for him. I hope you don't mind, but I made some notes as I was reading that I think will strengthen it:
'you were the one that open the library' - 'open' should be 'opened'
'the words I didn't understood.' - 'understood' should be 'understand'
'thirst of adventure' - 'of' should be 'for'
'I remember, that before' - unnecessary comma.
'You taught me to swim and showed me that strange fascination' - I don't think this quite says what you mean. Perhaps: 'You taught me to swim and inspired in me a strong fascination'
'so we can visit the world together' - 'can' should be 'could'
'you fought like a lion and give me three more precious years' - 'give' should be 'gave'
I hope that helps.
Mike
Comment Written 14-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2022
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Hi Mike:) thank you so much for the corrections. What do you think about this rewrite: "You taught me to swim and let me enchanted by that strange fascination of the aquatic world."
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That's a beautiful re-write, yes :-). I think it should be 'left' instead of 'let' but otherwise it's perfect.
