One Thousand Cranes
Viewing comments for Chapter 82 "Autumn's Crisp Breeze"Gypsy's Favorites
18 total reviews
Comment from Gert sherwood
4/7/5 Autumn Haiku
Autumn's Crisp Breeze
Gypsy Blue
What a perfect 4/7/5 Autumn Haiku showing us with your words
waltz or dance with fallen amber leaves --
sunset disco ball sets
Gert
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2022
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4/7/5 Autumn Haiku
Autumn's Crisp Breeze
Gypsy Blue
What a perfect 4/7/5 Autumn Haiku showing us with your words
waltz or dance with fallen amber leaves --
sunset disco ball sets
Gert
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review and helpfull feedback.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason." -Novalis
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You are most welcome Dolly
Gert
Comment from l.raven
Hi Gypsy, so very true my sweet friend...
and your picture is perfect to your poem...
the sunset looks just like a disco ball...
Love your poem beautiful girl...
and love your picture...very well written...
love you...Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2022
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Hi Gypsy, so very true my sweet friend...
and your picture is perfect to your poem...
the sunset looks just like a disco ball...
Love your poem beautiful girl...
and love your picture...very well written...
love you...Linda xxoo
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review and helpfull feedback. Love you too♡
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason." -Novalis
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always soooo welcome you...love xxoo
Comment from royowen
What an upbeat post is this, this is great Great, I like the idea of of autumn leaves waltzing, and the forests version of a disco dance, what an excellent haiku, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2022
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What an upbeat post is this, this is great Great, I like the idea of of autumn leaves waltzing, and the forests version of a disco dance, what an excellent haiku, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review and helpfull feedback.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason." -Novalis
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Most welcome
Comment from aryr
What a wonderful haiku, Gypsy. The sunset of the picture was beautiful, I am old enough to know what a disco ball is. I love the crispness of the dry leaves, the sound is inspiring. Blessed be n hugs!
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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What a wonderful haiku, Gypsy. The sunset of the picture was beautiful, I am old enough to know what a disco ball is. I love the crispness of the dry leaves, the sound is inspiring. Blessed be n hugs!
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review. Blessed be. ♡
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." -Atticus
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Most welcome, Gypsy. Blessed be n hugs!
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine poem, Gypsy----only don't rush autumn----just a reminder of how fast time's flying by, and I don't want to be reminded of it; bummed enough!
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Another fine poem, Gypsy----only don't rush autumn----just a reminder of how fast time's flying by, and I don't want to be reminded of it; bummed enough!
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review. ♡
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." -Atticus
Comment from RodG
Believe me, Poet, I like what you're trying to convey here, equating Autumn's dancing leaves with a musical setting. But your phrasing does not quite work for me. I can't see dancers WALTZ beneath a DISCO ball. It's one or the other. I prefer disco dancing as the rhythm seems more appropriate to what leaves doin Autumn.
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reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Believe me, Poet, I like what you're trying to convey here, equating Autumn's dancing leaves with a musical setting. But your phrasing does not quite work for me. I can't see dancers WALTZ beneath a DISCO ball. It's one or the other. I prefer disco dancing as the rhythm seems more appropriate to what leaves doin Autumn.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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The Disco ball was invented in 1920 but most people think of 70s, 80s, and 90s music. But haiku is a visual poem. It's impossible to imagine the breeze doing the moonwalk or Harlem shake. The shiny setting sun resembles the disco ball in this poem.
Thank you.
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Thank you for the info about disco ball?s history. I knew the ball was the sun, and I can easily imagine the leaves doing disco in the breeze alongside John Travolta.
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LoL i loved Saturday night fever
Comment from Ulla
Aw, this is such a beautiful haiku, Marival. The imagery is outstanding, every word in your short poem underlining just that. You are master, and you've taught me so much. Un abrazo, Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Aw, this is such a beautiful haiku, Marival. The imagery is outstanding, every word in your short poem underlining just that. You are master, and you've taught me so much. Un abrazo, Ulla:)))
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review. Besitos y abrazos.♡
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." --Atticus
Comment from lyenochka
You captured the lovely autumn breeze's dances! I wonder if it should be "waltzes" since the autumn breeze is is singular? Or it could be "breezes." I liked how you used two dances - the waltz and the disco!
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reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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You captured the lovely autumn breeze's dances! I wonder if it should be "waltzes" since the autumn breeze is is singular? Or it could be "breezes." I liked how you used two dances - the waltz and the disco!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2022
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Thank you, helen, I changed it.
Thank you very much! I appreciate your insightful review.
Hugs♡
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." --Atticus
