Reviews from

Absence of Bravery

Tyburn poem about a mouse.

6 total reviews 
Comment from GARY MACLEAN
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Yep, it doesn't just take a woman to be skeered of them pesky mice. Your last sentence, "hear my fear" rather than "see my fear" is great. Even in silence you could hear this guy's fear.

Funny one.

 Comment Written 05-Jul-2022


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2022
    I'm pleased you enjoyed this poem. Thanks for your comments.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
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Ha ha ha, this is a fun post, I love the alliteration and sentiments and I am never afraid of a mouse in the park, but if it was to stare back at me in my house, I would be terrified, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2022


reply by the author on 01-Jul-2022
    It's intriguing how little critters can strike terror into otherwise brave hearts.
reply by Dolly'sPoems on 01-Jul-2022
    So true x x x
Comment from Wendy G
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This Tyburn poem has both meaning and humour, and the rhymes are not forced. Hence it is an excellent entry for the contest, and I send my best wishes.
Wendy

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
    Thank you!
Comment from Carolyn Dooley
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This reminds me of my 52 year old son. Not too many years ago, he was outside running from a mouse. You did a great job with this. Thank you for sharing. Did make me laugh. Have a great night.

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
    Not all men are brave! I'm glad I gave you a funny memory.
reply by Carolyn Dooley on 30-Jun-2022
    Yes, thank you. I wish I had been outside to have seen him. My daughter told me about him running.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
    hahaha.
Comment from Jack Trevino
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LOL - this was a joy to read, and the image chosen cracked me up. Wonderful job! I might have switched Sneaking and Squeaking so that the squeaking came first since it's a bit of a stronger first word (just in my opinion), and I'm trying to think of another word for freaking to give it more oomph as an adjective for fear (I do like it here, but "freaking, shrieking fear" distracts me a tiny bit by being hard for me to say, haha, and then I get further distracted by thinking about whether it was meant as freakin' (like a SFW version of the f word) or freaking like freaking out). Now you'll hear my shrieking, peaking fear? Hmm... Well, anyway, I love what you've done with this form - thanks for sharing!

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
    It would be more usual to expect a picture of a woman being scared of a mouse, but I reckon some guys are too.
    I take your point about switching sneaking and squeaking - it does fit the action better.
    I used freaking in both senses of the word, as in panic as well as swearing.
Comment from jessizero
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I would have the same reaction to a mouse! You did a great job with this tyburn poem format. Thank you for sharing this poem here, and best wishes to you.

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
    I'm actually not scared of mice, so I was playing to the common fear of others.
reply by jessizero on 30-Jun-2022
    Well, you did a great job!
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
    I thought it would be fun to have the picture showing a guy being scared instead of the usual expectation of a woman.