Doors
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Isabel & Luisa"An Encanto fan fic, cause why not.
2 total reviews
Comment from prettybluebirds
In the first paragraph, the word (had) is missing and should be (she had) The story does seem to jump around quite a bit but I was able to follow it. It is terribly long and a lot of reviewers won't read it for that reason. All-in-all it is nicely done.
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2022
  |
In the first paragraph, the word (had) is missing and should be (she had) The story does seem to jump around quite a bit but I was able to follow it. It is terribly long and a lot of reviewers won't read it for that reason. All-in-all it is nicely done.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2022
-
Is okay if I don't get a bunch of reviews...I'll end up with plot issues otherwise. And thank you for the kind words, I appreciate you taking the time to do so.
Comment from Rachelle Allen
What an intriguing concept this is, and I loved the ethereal quality to it as well as how the story progresses. Good twists and turns and unexpected reveals.
Two little nits that I noticed: The paragraph that begins "She turned and entered her sister's room.." later reads: "but he'd a literal jungle." I think there's a word missing there.
Also, the paragraph that begins "Expecting to see the hard, strong surface..." ends with a question mark after "soft and fluffy". Was that what you intended?
Looking forward to the next installment.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2022
 |
What an intriguing concept this is, and I loved the ethereal quality to it as well as how the story progresses. Good twists and turns and unexpected reveals.
Two little nits that I noticed: The paragraph that begins "She turned and entered her sister's room.." later reads: "but he'd a literal jungle." I think there's a word missing there.
Also, the paragraph that begins "Expecting to see the hard, strong surface..." ends with a question mark after "soft and fluffy". Was that what you intended?
Looking forward to the next installment.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2022
-
Thanks for reading - I think what was missing was a line spacing...and yup the question mark was on purpose.
I appreciate you taking the time to read and review
