The Waterfall
Watching a beautiful river feature. (3-5-3)9 total reviews
Comment from Tom Horonzy
True, while the river flows softly, but when the river rises the tears the cataract cries is savage, and without management can cause the waters below to overflow causing lots of damage. I like this 3-5-3
True, while the river flows softly, but when the river rises the tears the cataract cries is savage, and without management can cause the waters below to overflow causing lots of damage. I like this 3-5-3
Comment Written 14-Jul-2022
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
I like this nature 3-5-3 poem. The syllable count is accurate. The font size is easy to read. The message is beautifully worded. The visual fits perfectly. Good luck in the contest.
I like this nature 3-5-3 poem. The syllable count is accurate. The font size is easy to read. The message is beautifully worded. The visual fits perfectly. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2022
Comment from Scott Rhodie
Well written and gives the full force of nature, and tails off daintily at the end. I really like this, and I am sure you will do well in the contest.
Well written and gives the full force of nature, and tails off daintily at the end. I really like this, and I am sure you will do well in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2022
Comment from Mica Hesp
I love this so much! Clever to use the title and image to your advantage so that you could spend all of your syllables on luscious description! So many layers and competing images (lace and force, grace and movement), much like a waterfall itself. I'm also impressed with how much rhyme and rhythm you packed into an already constrained form. It's as if we're toppling down with the water, and then the final rhyme signals the bottom. Really playful!
The only thing I wondered about is whether your dash is necessary. There is already the natural pause of the line break, so this serves to extend it - which perhaps was exactly your intention! But just a thought. Best of luck with the contest!
I love this so much! Clever to use the title and image to your advantage so that you could spend all of your syllables on luscious description! So many layers and competing images (lace and force, grace and movement), much like a waterfall itself. I'm also impressed with how much rhyme and rhythm you packed into an already constrained form. It's as if we're toppling down with the water, and then the final rhyme signals the bottom. Really playful!
The only thing I wondered about is whether your dash is necessary. There is already the natural pause of the line break, so this serves to extend it - which perhaps was exactly your intention! But just a thought. Best of luck with the contest!
Comment Written 14-Jul-2022
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
Author,
This is an exceptional 3-5-3 poem.
In eleven syllables you capture the movement and beauty of the falls.
Good luck with your outstanding poem.
Blessings,
Cindy
Author,
This is an exceptional 3-5-3 poem.
In eleven syllables you capture the movement and beauty of the falls.
Good luck with your outstanding poem.
Blessings,
Cindy
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Very nice image and presentation.
-The syllable count is good, along with the topic.
-Effective imagery and rhyme.
-You capture the essence of the picture very well.
-I also like your concluding line.
-Good luck in the contest.
-Very nice image and presentation.
-The syllable count is good, along with the topic.
-Effective imagery and rhyme.
-You capture the essence of the picture very well.
-I also like your concluding line.
-Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022
Comment from Bill Schott
This 3-5-3, Waterfall, has the right setup and combines the actual power of the irresistible water and its whimsical appearance of spray.
This 3-5-3, Waterfall, has the right setup and combines the actual power of the irresistible water and its whimsical appearance of spray.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022
Comment from Fleedleflump
Grace and forceful are a perfect pairing here, because we wouldn't normally associate them with one another, but in the power of a waterfall, they combine. I love the alliteration that, along with the rhyme, gives this a tight, fast movement - just like the subject. Beautifully done :-)
Mike
Grace and forceful are a perfect pairing here, because we wouldn't normally associate them with one another, but in the power of a waterfall, they combine. I love the alliteration that, along with the rhyme, gives this a tight, fast movement - just like the subject. Beautifully done :-)
Mike
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This is a very nicely written and presented 3-5-3 poem. The line-end rhyme is a poetic device that provides the poem with added interest. Well done, Kate xx
This is a very nicely written and presented 3-5-3 poem. The line-end rhyme is a poetic device that provides the poem with added interest. Well done, Kate xx
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022