Penelope Van Princis
A Grandma to be proud of.41 total reviews
Comment from tfawcus
This is an amazing story of fortitude. There are times when the human spirit transcends its perceived borders and miracles of endurance are achieved. This is a fine example of it. The story is well told and well worth the telling.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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This is an amazing story of fortitude. There are times when the human spirit transcends its perceived borders and miracles of endurance are achieved. This is a fine example of it. The story is well told and well worth the telling.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. Yep, Penelope must have been one tough lady. Hugs
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I trust she passed down some of those genes. LOL
Comment from GARY MACLEAN
Wow, that's quite a story. I looked Penelope up and your words are true to form. She must have been a model pioneer woman.
A couple of observations:
Para 5, 8th sentence: CONSIDER placing (ouch) before the period. Make it a part of that sentence.
PARA 8, 5th sentence: CONSIDER changing (country, in all seven) to (country; in all,) The two clauses can stand alone.
Para 10, 4th sentence: Add comma after (midnight)
Para 11, 1st sentence: Remove one space between (Richard,) and (their)
Para 14, 4th sentence: Add comma after (times)
You should be very proud to call her grandma, proud to have her in your ancestral line. Amazing.
Very intriguing story.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Wow, that's quite a story. I looked Penelope up and your words are true to form. She must have been a model pioneer woman.
A couple of observations:
Para 5, 8th sentence: CONSIDER placing (ouch) before the period. Make it a part of that sentence.
PARA 8, 5th sentence: CONSIDER changing (country, in all seven) to (country; in all,) The two clauses can stand alone.
Para 10, 4th sentence: Add comma after (midnight)
Para 11, 1st sentence: Remove one space between (Richard,) and (their)
Para 14, 4th sentence: Add comma after (times)
You should be very proud to call her grandma, proud to have her in your ancestral line. Amazing.
Very intriguing story.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you, and thanks for catching the oops! Good reviewers like you help so much. Hugs.
Comment from irishauthorme
Amazing. I think that those ancestors of ours were a lot tougher than we are today because they faced many what we would now call 'hardships,' that were just part of their normal day.
No indoor plumbing. Outhouses. Just candle or torchlight. All homemade clothes. No summer cooling, woodfire(You cut, split and haul) heat in winter. By foot, wagon or horseback travel. Primitive medical.
And we gripe about a slow computer?
Good story!
irish
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Amazing. I think that those ancestors of ours were a lot tougher than we are today because they faced many what we would now call 'hardships,' that were just part of their normal day.
No indoor plumbing. Outhouses. Just candle or torchlight. All homemade clothes. No summer cooling, woodfire(You cut, split and haul) heat in winter. By foot, wagon or horseback travel. Primitive medical.
And we gripe about a slow computer?
Good story!
irish
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. I can remember living without an indoor bathroom, or plumbing. We cooked and heated the house with wood. We helped dad cut and stack the wood every year. There was no television until I was around ten. It was just the way things were and we thought nothing of it. Hugs
Comment from BethShelby
This is a really great story and perfect for the contest. She was one tough lady. I'm sure your are proud to call her her ancestor. I also had ancestors living in New Jersey at time but likely another parts.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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This is a really great story and perfect for the contest. She was one tough lady. I'm sure your are proud to call her her ancestor. I also had ancestors living in New Jersey at time but likely another parts.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Hugs
Comment from Faith Williams
What an interesting history! Penelope does sound like one tough lady.
One particular item that I noted is that at the beginning of your piece you refer to the Native Americans as Native Americans. Throughout the rest of your piece, you refer to them as Indians. You may want to consider changing all of those references to Native Americans.
The sentence in paragraph 10, "The treaty remained faithfully kept throughout the years," is a little awkward. Maybe, "The treaty was faithfully kept..." or "The treaty remained intact throughout the years."
Thanks again for sharing your interesting story. Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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What an interesting history! Penelope does sound like one tough lady.
One particular item that I noted is that at the beginning of your piece you refer to the Native Americans as Native Americans. Throughout the rest of your piece, you refer to them as Indians. You may want to consider changing all of those references to Native Americans.
The sentence in paragraph 10, "The treaty remained faithfully kept throughout the years," is a little awkward. Maybe, "The treaty was faithfully kept..." or "The treaty remained intact throughout the years."
Thanks again for sharing your interesting story. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you and thanks for the tips. I will consider them. I wrote Indians because everyone knows they are Native Americans and it is easier to read than repeating Native Americans over and over.
Comment from Marienkiefer
This is a very interesting genealogy and subject.
-The story has right POV to tell this story.
-Good story development and flow, which makes for easy reading.
-Might it be interesting, if you so choose, to explore the full summation of your main characters strengths--the person of whom this story is about, as well as her personal qualities. Could it be interesting to you to imagine how her victories and defeats may have shaped her. In order to find an ending that fully encompasses story and does justice to an amazing woman, not crippled by pain. I wonder if you would explore that more or have you already considered that.
-Does adding the word: ouch add additional meaning, do you think.
Best of luck on your entry. You have a great family history and story.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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This is a very interesting genealogy and subject.
-The story has right POV to tell this story.
-Good story development and flow, which makes for easy reading.
-Might it be interesting, if you so choose, to explore the full summation of your main characters strengths--the person of whom this story is about, as well as her personal qualities. Could it be interesting to you to imagine how her victories and defeats may have shaped her. In order to find an ending that fully encompasses story and does justice to an amazing woman, not crippled by pain. I wonder if you would explore that more or have you already considered that.
-Does adding the word: ouch add additional meaning, do you think.
Best of luck on your entry. You have a great family history and story.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. Yes, I have considered doing a story based on the information my sister found about Penelope. There is a lot of material for a great story. Hugs.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this amazing lady with us this contest entry. Wow!!!! I enjoyed reading and wish you the best of luck with the contest.
He treated her kindly and she recovered. (should be a comma after 'kindly' because you switched subjects)
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you for sharing this amazing lady with us this contest entry. Wow!!!! I enjoyed reading and wish you the best of luck with the contest.
He treated her kindly and she recovered. (should be a comma after 'kindly' because you switched subjects)
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you and thanks for catching the oops! I do try to watch those commas, but sometimes they get by me. Hugs
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Crikey! She really was a tough lady! I'm sure she must have been in agony. And then went on to have 10 children. Amazing! I'm sure your sister was glad she did the research, what a wonderful discovery. I really enjoyed reading this, and it makes me wonder what my distant relations were like. Good luck in the contest!! :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Crikey! She really was a tough lady! I'm sure she must have been in agony. And then went on to have 10 children. Amazing! I'm sure your sister was glad she did the research, what a wonderful discovery. I really enjoyed reading this, and it makes me wonder what my distant relations were like. Good luck in the contest!! :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. It is fascinating to find out what one's ancestors were like. Hugs.
Comment from Wendy G
She sounds like a most amazing woman, and a very tough one. You have written of her well, maintaining the reader's interest throughout. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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She sounds like a most amazing woman, and a very tough one. You have written of her well, maintaining the reader's interest throughout. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. I think perhaps I will write a story about Penelope. There is a lot of good material in the researh to work with. Hugs
Comment from karenina
Fascinating! Such incredible detail to be uncovered through genealogical research!
I've done a bit of ancestral digging myself and managed to accumulate only the sparsest of historical facts...
Penelope deserves to have a book written about her!
I'd like to think someone in my Native American bloodline helped sew those wounds...
Thanks for sharing!
Karenina
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Fascinating! Such incredible detail to be uncovered through genealogical research!
I've done a bit of ancestral digging myself and managed to accumulate only the sparsest of historical facts...
Penelope deserves to have a book written about her!
I'd like to think someone in my Native American bloodline helped sew those wounds...
Thanks for sharing!
Karenina
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
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Thank you. I may write a story about Penelope. I have a lot of interesting facts to work with. Hugs
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I know I'd love to read it!
