Have Faith
Blended Rhyming Poem30 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
JIm,
This is a well done poem with a different rhyme scheme. It seems the matching lines in each stanza rhyme. This describes a lonely man contemplating his life traveling alone.
Maybe the rules should have the poet supply the four lines they used form the chosen poem.
Good luck in the prompt contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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JIm,
This is a well done poem with a different rhyme scheme. It seems the matching lines in each stanza rhyme. This describes a lonely man contemplating his life traveling alone.
Maybe the rules should have the poet supply the four lines they used form the chosen poem.
Good luck in the prompt contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Hi Joan, see the authors notes, four lines excerpted from Tintern Abbey by William Wordsworth ---Smiling back!
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You do list the poem and author as the rules state, but not the actual lines you chose to use. Is this a way to get us to read more famous poetry?
Joan
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Joan, please see the addenda in author's notes thanks and smiles back.
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Thanks for supplying the whole poem.
I read someone elses poem for this prompt. She put an asterix to mark the borrowed lines.
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That is a smashing idea! I couldn't highlight it and I knew many would not read my note about it coming from the second stanza and the line numbers, Alas I learn as I go...🤗
Comment from Nic
I love the way that you are able to maintain a tonal similarity with Wordsworth in this. I think that your first stanza is really strong. The juxtaposition of the complex language with "not so smart" was lovely!
The second stanza doesn't match the strength of the first (or the third, really). I think your shift to the second person (or at least your movement away from acknowledging the first person I/my like you do throughout stanza one) for the first three lines of stanza two moves us away from that narrator we have connected with in the first stanza. I really like the speaker of the poem, so when it feels like he/she takes a back seat for a few lines, I feel like we lose some momentum. Simply incorporating one or two of first person pronouns into the first or second line of that stanza would help I think.
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reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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I love the way that you are able to maintain a tonal similarity with Wordsworth in this. I think that your first stanza is really strong. The juxtaposition of the complex language with "not so smart" was lovely!
The second stanza doesn't match the strength of the first (or the third, really). I think your shift to the second person (or at least your movement away from acknowledging the first person I/my like you do throughout stanza one) for the first three lines of stanza two moves us away from that narrator we have connected with in the first stanza. I really like the speaker of the poem, so when it feels like he/she takes a back seat for a few lines, I feel like we lose some momentum. Simply incorporating one or two of first person pronouns into the first or second line of that stanza would help I think.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Nic, I see your point and appreciate your comments. Thanks ...
Comment from lyenochka
Thank you for sharing that Wordsworth poem and weaving that feeling of the poem into your poem. I like that picture, too. My favorite lines were:
"I must put faith above hurts from the start."
and
"I must enter with trust and do my part."
Appreciate the call have faith and keep the faith.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Thank you for sharing that Wordsworth poem and weaving that feeling of the poem into your poem. I like that picture, too. My favorite lines were:
"I must put faith above hurts from the start."
and
"I must enter with trust and do my part."
Appreciate the call have faith and keep the faith.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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A big thank you, lyenochka! I always value your comment!
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this writing prompt with us. You did a wonderful job matching the tone of your poem with that of William Wordsworth, one of the best all time poets. I enjoyed reading.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Thank you for sharing this writing prompt with us. You did a wonderful job matching the tone of your poem with that of William Wordsworth, one of the best all time poets. I enjoyed reading.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Smiling back!
Comment from Boogienights
This seems like a difficult form of poetry to do, I wanted to try but was unsure as to how to do it. I really love your poem and the picture you paired it with. Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest. :)
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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This seems like a difficult form of poetry to do, I wanted to try but was unsure as to how to do it. I really love your poem and the picture you paired it with. Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest. :)
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Boogienights, thank you for the validation!
Comment from elainec4
Enjoyed your inspiring work. And I appreciate the refreshing of long-lost knowledge about William Wordsworth. You incorporated his words well with your ideas and your words. I particularly was intrigued by this line of yours: "knowing I did cheat my soul from the very start". Thanks for sharing your talent. elaine
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Enjoyed your inspiring work. And I appreciate the refreshing of long-lost knowledge about William Wordsworth. You incorporated his words well with your ideas and your words. I particularly was intrigued by this line of yours: "knowing I did cheat my soul from the very start". Thanks for sharing your talent. elaine
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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elaine, thank you!
Comment from Sally Law
This is exceptional in this form new to me. I enjoyed the lead in poem by William Wordsworth. It was hard to distinguish your talent from his. Bravo on such fine poetry!
Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest,
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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This is exceptional in this form new to me. I enjoyed the lead in poem by William Wordsworth. It was hard to distinguish your talent from his. Bravo on such fine poetry!
Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest,
Sal XOs
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Sal, I am humbled by your validation
Comment from Lloyd T. Okoko
The objective correlative of your work reminisces the primacy of faith in tiding humanity through all odds in life.
The work highlights the the protagonist's use of faith as fulcrum that aided him through the oddities of life and why he hopes not to relinquish his hold on it.
The work earns its texture through its effective use of rhymes, similes and imagery.
Excellent work. Bravo.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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The objective correlative of your work reminisces the primacy of faith in tiding humanity through all odds in life.
The work highlights the the protagonist's use of faith as fulcrum that aided him through the oddities of life and why he hopes not to relinquish his hold on it.
The work earns its texture through its effective use of rhymes, similes and imagery.
Excellent work. Bravo.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Lloyd, thank you for your comments and validation on this piece.
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Remain Blessed.
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Remain Blessed.
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, Have Faith, is written in a manner to pull this reader into its delivery. The message of perseverance comes through despite the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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This poem, Have Faith, is written in a manner to pull this reader into its delivery. The message of perseverance comes through despite the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Bill, thank you for your review and comments.
Comment from Fleedleflump
You've done a lovely job of matching tone whilst also making this something of a tribute piece. There's a classical feel to your lines, with that thoughtful pace of something that's been carefully considered. I very much enjoyed the read.
Mike
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reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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You've done a lovely job of matching tone whilst also making this something of a tribute piece. There's a classical feel to your lines, with that thoughtful pace of something that's been carefully considered. I very much enjoyed the read.
Mike
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2022
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Mike, I appreciate your comments and validation, I am pleased you enjoyed this.
