The Miranda Chronicles
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Hammer Time (pt. 7)"Miranda solves a mystery.
12 total reviews
Comment from Sankey
This was so, so relevant to today. It is good some smidgin of progress just might be happening. Well done. Very expressive. Almost like you are aware of similar circs in real life. No spags. Keep it coming.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2022
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This was so, so relevant to today. It is good some smidgin of progress just might be happening. Well done. Very expressive. Almost like you are aware of similar circs in real life. No spags. Keep it coming.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2022
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Thank you so much for your excellent review. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.
Gretchen
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No worries keep at it.
Comment from Thomas Blanks
Three-day-old onion sandwich? How do you know that smells bad? I want to know. Are you making onions sandwiches, eating only half, and letting the other half sit in your fridge for three days? LOL What else goes on an onion sandwich besides bread and sliced onion? Mayo? Pepper Jack cheese? Or does that make it a cheese sandwich?
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2022
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Three-day-old onion sandwich? How do you know that smells bad? I want to know. Are you making onions sandwiches, eating only half, and letting the other half sit in your fridge for three days? LOL What else goes on an onion sandwich besides bread and sliced onion? Mayo? Pepper Jack cheese? Or does that make it a cheese sandwich?
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2022
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Lol. Did I hit a nerve with the onion sandwich? Thank you for your humorous review.
Gretchen
Comment from Jay Squires
You have nailed both characters, Gretchen! There were stark actions by each, and neither required transitional narrative. Bam! the slamming of a fist ... and Miranda's outburst follows. She comes away being tough as nails, but loving. How can Waylon ever have his way against such overwhelm! Once again, you get my six, dear!
Jay
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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You have nailed both characters, Gretchen! There were stark actions by each, and neither required transitional narrative. Bam! the slamming of a fist ... and Miranda's outburst follows. She comes away being tough as nails, but loving. How can Waylon ever have his way against such overwhelm! Once again, you get my six, dear!
Jay
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Awe. You're spoiling me! Thank you so much.
Gretchen
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Well, Miranda could've called CPS. Waylon better shape up
immediately. I believe he really cares for her but doesn't want
to show it--and the same for her. You did a great job with this
chapter, Gretchen. Everything fits and is believable considering
the situation. It'll be interesting to see how Miranda and Waylon
change, if they do. You have several ways this story could continue.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Well, Miranda could've called CPS. Waylon better shape up
immediately. I believe he really cares for her but doesn't want
to show it--and the same for her. You did a great job with this
chapter, Gretchen. Everything fits and is believable considering
the situation. It'll be interesting to see how Miranda and Waylon
change, if they do. You have several ways this story could continue.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thank you. I'm hoping they will learn to depend on each other
Comment from royowen
How fascination Dougie is a real scuzzball, how a person like that can live inside his own body is beyond, I can remember a time when I didn't like myself, but I still hoped I would be better some day. With God's help it happened. But our heroine has a heart and a sense of maternalism, beautifully written Gretchen, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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How fascination Dougie is a real scuzzball, how a person like that can live inside his own body is beyond, I can remember a time when I didn't like myself, but I still hoped I would be better some day. With God's help it happened. But our heroine has a heart and a sense of maternalism, beautifully written Gretchen, blessings Roy
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thank you. It is hard to imagine walking away from your own child but I have seen it done time and again. Thanks so much for the wonderful review
Gretchen
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Yep, I couldn?t do it either.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I'm glad a foundation is laid, and I have a feeling it's going to work out for the both of them. I can't wait for more and find out how it will work out. I know it's going to be a struggle. I am liking this story.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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I'm glad a foundation is laid, and I have a feeling it's going to work out for the both of them. I can't wait for more and find out how it will work out. I know it's going to be a struggle. I am liking this story.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thank you. I appreciate your time invested and the feedback.
Gretchen
Comment from Rachelle Allen
I feel a little crack in the ice here. I feel the teeniest bit hopeful. It's so realistic for Waylon to be holding on to the idea that his dad will return in two weeks; that's what kids do, positive, trusting, believing creatures that they are, regardless of age. But there's that underlying dread, too, by both Waylon and Miranda, of how slim the chance of it really is.
Can't wait to see how this continues to play out.
You're doing an absolutely fantastic job with this, Gretchen. All your characters are SO believable! xo
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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I feel a little crack in the ice here. I feel the teeniest bit hopeful. It's so realistic for Waylon to be holding on to the idea that his dad will return in two weeks; that's what kids do, positive, trusting, believing creatures that they are, regardless of age. But there's that underlying dread, too, by both Waylon and Miranda, of how slim the chance of it really is.
Can't wait to see how this continues to play out.
You're doing an absolutely fantastic job with this, Gretchen. All your characters are SO believable! xo
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thank you so much. This has been a fun story to write. But even more so with these kinds of reviews. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Gretchen
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I honestly look forward to each new chapter.
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Thank you so much ❤️
Comment from Wendy G
A great continuation. You write very well, and I'm glad she stood up to the kid and set the rules. First comes acceptance, then respect, then hopefully the relationship will overcome hurdles and deepen. Looking forward to the next.
Wendy
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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A great continuation. You write very well, and I'm glad she stood up to the kid and set the rules. First comes acceptance, then respect, then hopefully the relationship will overcome hurdles and deepen. Looking forward to the next.
Wendy
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thank you. If he's like most thirteen year Olds, he's gonna continue to push the limits. Lol. Thank you so much for your great review.
Gretchen
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Miranda may ignore red flags, and do things her own way, but without grouping the parts or at the least providing the readers with a "story so far" summary, she cannot expect us to remember what has already happened. Thus, this comes across as a battle with no context, between two people whose characters we know little about. This is a shame. Kate xx
Note: very firey words > very fiery words. But is very necessary, or does it actually weaken the image. Something is either fiery or not. There are no degrees.
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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Miranda may ignore red flags, and do things her own way, but without grouping the parts or at the least providing the readers with a "story so far" summary, she cannot expect us to remember what has already happened. Thus, this comes across as a battle with no context, between two people whose characters we know little about. This is a shame. Kate xx
Note: very firey words > very fiery words. But is very necessary, or does it actually weaken the image. Something is either fiery or not. There are no degrees.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thank you. I have taken your suggestions and added a thus far at the beginning. I truly appreciate your help and the review.
Gretchen
Comment from lyenochka
Great continuation! I liked that Miranda laid down the law and even managed to squeeze out a smile from Waylon. You certainly got the typical teenage anger down (wait, I experienced that from adult kids!) and then you brought in the BO which is something that hormonally charged teens reek of!
The very firey words that fill my mouth (fiery)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Great continuation! I liked that Miranda laid down the law and even managed to squeeze out a smile from Waylon. You certainly got the typical teenage anger down (wait, I experienced that from adult kids!) and then you brought in the BO which is something that hormonally charged teens reek of!
The very firey words that fill my mouth (fiery)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2022
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Thanks so much. I appreciate the fact that you gave me detailed feedback. Have since corrected the spag.
Gretchen
