Stop and look
Free verse poem5 total reviews
Comment from Sarah Flores
I gave used to stars because for some reason I just could not catch on to what you were trying to portray I wasn't sure the moral of the story I'm sorry maybe it's just me. My advice to you would be to be a little bit more descriptive and relatable in your poetry so when other people read it they feel like they're reading a part of their own story as well. This poem made me feel a little lost maybe you could work on your rhyme theme a little? But well done on your creativeness and I I could tell you put a lot of emotion into this writing.
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2022
I gave used to stars because for some reason I just could not catch on to what you were trying to portray I wasn't sure the moral of the story I'm sorry maybe it's just me. My advice to you would be to be a little bit more descriptive and relatable in your poetry so when other people read it they feel like they're reading a part of their own story as well. This poem made me feel a little lost maybe you could work on your rhyme theme a little? But well done on your creativeness and I I could tell you put a lot of emotion into this writing.
Comment Written 09-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2022
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Thanks for your review
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I thought the line about the hobbit book was hilarious! This was an enjoyable poem. Love the feel of it - very much a free form. The last line was a bit of a run on if you can do that with poems. But you can see just looking at it that it doesn't "fit" - a little long. Outside of that this was a joy to read! Great job on your first post!
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2022
I thought the line about the hobbit book was hilarious! This was an enjoyable poem. Love the feel of it - very much a free form. The last line was a bit of a run on if you can do that with poems. But you can see just looking at it that it doesn't "fit" - a little long. Outside of that this was a joy to read! Great job on your first post!
Comment Written 09-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2022
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Thanks
Comment from humpwhistle
Think your poem can interpreted in a number of different ways. I can't say I followed all you are saying. But, I tend to be more of a literalist. My problem, not yours.
Welcome aboard, Brian, and I hope get the responses you're looking for.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2022
Think your poem can interpreted in a number of different ways. I can't say I followed all you are saying. But, I tend to be more of a literalist. My problem, not yours.
Welcome aboard, Brian, and I hope get the responses you're looking for.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 09-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2022
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Thanks
Comment from dragonpoet
First of all welcome to the site. You will become a better writer here and maybe make a couple of friends while at it.
This seems to say that love started but then the lovers hobby of reading stifled it. The arrow that just missed you is the love that lost.
I think you don't feel swearing is needed in a poem. And you just could say book. Specifying the type of book could offend those who like fantasy book and especially the Lord of the Rings series. Also reading can inspire writing.
I think you could break the last line into two or three lines to make the flow better.
Hope this helps and doesn't turn you away.
Joan
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2022
First of all welcome to the site. You will become a better writer here and maybe make a couple of friends while at it.
This seems to say that love started but then the lovers hobby of reading stifled it. The arrow that just missed you is the love that lost.
I think you don't feel swearing is needed in a poem. And you just could say book. Specifying the type of book could offend those who like fantasy book and especially the Lord of the Rings series. Also reading can inspire writing.
I think you could break the last line into two or three lines to make the flow better.
Hope this helps and doesn't turn you away.
Joan
Comment Written 08-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2022
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Thanks for the review
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No problem, Brian.
Joan
Comment from playinaround
I really like the multiple rhymes It flowed nicely and was rhythmic to read. I am looking forward to seeing more posts from you. Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2022
I really like the multiple rhymes It flowed nicely and was rhythmic to read. I am looking forward to seeing more posts from you. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 08-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2022
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Thanks