Last Call
The HotHouse Bar, part three of four.29 total reviews
Comment from Soledadpaz
Your characters don't disappoint. Love the Bingo reference, "all night and twice this morning."
Looks like Jennifer is smitten. She's going to be playing her own bingo card.
Great read!
Sol
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2022
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Your characters don't disappoint. Love the Bingo reference, "all night and twice this morning."
Looks like Jennifer is smitten. She's going to be playing her own bingo card.
Great read!
Sol
Comment Written 02-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2022
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Sol, thank you for the six stars, I really appreciate you very kind review! Terry.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Okay; I know this is fiction, but do they really have bars and women in Texas who party like in your story? If they do, ouch! I guess it pays to stay home at night instead of running into the bars. One would get themselves in trouble without even trying.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2022
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Okay; I know this is fiction, but do they really have bars and women in Texas who party like in your story? If they do, ouch! I guess it pays to stay home at night instead of running into the bars. One would get themselves in trouble without even trying.
Comment Written 02-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2022
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Rosemary, you asked a really good question of the wrong bar, I have not been in a bar in over forty years. Purely fiction on my part, thank you for reading. Terry.
Comment from Judy Lawless
You've done a good job with the banter in this one, Terry, although there were a few places where I wasn't sure who was speaking. I'm also a little confused about the opening paragraph: "On a Thursday at 5 PM, Jennifer started organizing the bar for happy hour. Her lunchtime regulars would soon be here, " It's 5 pm and Jennifer is getting organized for Happy Hour, but then it's stated the lunchtime regulars would soon arrive? You might want to take a look at that.
Also: "the thirty-three-(year)-old bartender,"
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2022
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You've done a good job with the banter in this one, Terry, although there were a few places where I wasn't sure who was speaking. I'm also a little confused about the opening paragraph: "On a Thursday at 5 PM, Jennifer started organizing the bar for happy hour. Her lunchtime regulars would soon be here, " It's 5 pm and Jennifer is getting organized for Happy Hour, but then it's stated the lunchtime regulars would soon arrive? You might want to take a look at that.
Also: "the thirty-three-(year)-old bartender,"
Comment Written 01-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2022
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Judy, thank you for reading and for your suggestions. Terry.
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You're welcome, Terry.
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Changes have been made
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Thumbs up. :)
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is a great story. Each character is an interesting individual and most of them are amusing. Ric isn't amusing, he's hot. Jennifer should probably amuse herself with him, even if it is only a three-week gig.
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2022
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This is a great story. Each character is an interesting individual and most of them are amusing. Ric isn't amusing, he's hot. Jennifer should probably amuse herself with him, even if it is only a three-week gig.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2022
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Carol, thank you for reading and for your review. Terry.
Comment from Shirley McLain
Nice chapter to read. Your characters fascinate me and how they came to be. Especially the wife with the philandering husband and his girlfriend. I'm looking forward to the next installment. Have a great evening. Shirley
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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Nice chapter to read. Your characters fascinate me and how they came to be. Especially the wife with the philandering husband and his girlfriend. I'm looking forward to the next installment. Have a great evening. Shirley
Comment Written 31-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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Shirley, thank you for reading, the last chapter will be posted tomorrow, Terry
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
LOL! I have made it to the big time! What a great chapter, Terry, and it looks like Jennifer is ready to relax and break her record of 12 years! Lol. That was a long time! This has reminded me off the days long ago, when friends would all meet up in the evenings, doing things chatting away and having fun. I've really enjoyed this story, and can't wait to see how you are going to end this. I'm thinking it's going to be Jennifer walking off into the sunset on Ric's arm!! Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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LOL! I have made it to the big time! What a great chapter, Terry, and it looks like Jennifer is ready to relax and break her record of 12 years! Lol. That was a long time! This has reminded me off the days long ago, when friends would all meet up in the evenings, doing things chatting away and having fun. I've really enjoyed this story, and can't wait to see how you are going to end this. I'm thinking it's going to be Jennifer walking off into the sunset on Ric's arm!! Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 31-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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Sandra, thank you so much for those kind comments. I will post the last one tomorrow. I hope it meets your expectations. Terry.
Comment from irishauthorme
Good chapter! I also sense Jennifer looking to compensate for those 12 celibate years. I know she's thinking, "What the hell, he'll be gone in a couple of weeks, anyway."
Your other characters are great at filling the gaps, and they add a lot of interest to your story.
Interesting situation with Evelyn and Stan, kind of admire her fortitude. She is looking at the threesome realistically, from the money side.
The conclusion is going to be vewwy, vewwy interesting!
irish
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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Good chapter! I also sense Jennifer looking to compensate for those 12 celibate years. I know she's thinking, "What the hell, he'll be gone in a couple of weeks, anyway."
Your other characters are great at filling the gaps, and they add a lot of interest to your story.
Interesting situation with Evelyn and Stan, kind of admire her fortitude. She is looking at the threesome realistically, from the money side.
The conclusion is going to be vewwy, vewwy interesting!
irish
Comment Written 31-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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LOL, Irish, I hope you like the last installment, comes out tomorrow. Thank you very much for reading. Terry.
Comment from the13thpoet
A marvelous Monday morning to you Terry, I hope this finds you well. Another well written part of your story, I like how you incorporate some of our female fanstory writers into the story, I look forward to reading more. Good stuff.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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A marvelous Monday morning to you Terry, I hope this finds you well. Another well written part of your story, I like how you incorporate some of our female fanstory writers into the story, I look forward to reading more. Good stuff.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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Thank you for reading my story, I am delighted you are enjoying it. The last installment will post tomorrow. Terry.
Comment from Mary Vigasin
What I like most about this story is the quirky and fun dialogue between these barflies. The aspirations, the jib, and the last call lines are fun and brilliant. I must also add the "Jenny" jackass comment.
Well done, Terry. I am looking forward to the last installment.
Best wishes,
Mary
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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What I like most about this story is the quirky and fun dialogue between these barflies. The aspirations, the jib, and the last call lines are fun and brilliant. I must also add the "Jenny" jackass comment.
Well done, Terry. I am looking forward to the last installment.
Best wishes,
Mary
Comment Written 31-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
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Mary, LOL, I am glad you are having fun with the story, which is what I intended, the last one will post tomorrow. Thank you for reading and for your review. Terry.
Comment from lyenochka
Oh her "toes are curling" - isn't that a reference to a movie? I sense some romance is brewing. And thanks for the Amy Grant song. If you paste the "embed code" in the notes, the reader can click it and listen while staying on your post.
I'm so glad you added our famous novelists to your story like " Sandra Mitchell, Ulla, Barbara Wilkey, and Sally Law."
Suggestions:
Right Hollis?" (comma after Right)
"Evelyn is it a little weird (comma after Evelyn)
"Opps." (Is that the same as Oops?)
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2022
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Oh her "toes are curling" - isn't that a reference to a movie? I sense some romance is brewing. And thanks for the Amy Grant song. If you paste the "embed code" in the notes, the reader can click it and listen while staying on your post.
I'm so glad you added our famous novelists to your story like " Sandra Mitchell, Ulla, Barbara Wilkey, and Sally Law."
Suggestions:
Right Hollis?" (comma after Right)
"Evelyn is it a little weird (comma after Evelyn)
"Opps." (Is that the same as Oops?)
Comment Written 30-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2022
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Helen, thank you for your review. I never heard the line about toes curling in a movie. I heard it from a girlfriend when I was in my twenties...many moons ago. Thanks for the edits. I think Oops is right, alteast Alexa thinks so. Terry.
