Reviews from

Madge's Cafe`

1,950 words. The first Madge story.

17 total reviews 
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Whatever Madge is, doesn't really matter, she's a most attractive character, and someone that's wanted and needed in a place that's cold and dark and forbidding, a place of refuge and strength, a way side inn for the weary traveller. This is so beautifully written Mike, well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi, Roy. Thank you for your kind words and support of my work. It's deeply appreciated!

    Have a great day, and God bless.
    mike
reply by royowen on 26-Oct-2022
    Most welcome Mike
Comment from GWHARGIS
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I read the other Madge story you posted. This one is just as heartwarming. I hear her southern drawl in every line she speaks. I feel the warmth of her non-judgmental love. This was a wonderful and lovely story. Great job. Thank you for posting. Gretchen

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi, Gretchen. Thank you for your kind words!

    Have a great day, and God bless.
    mike
Comment from damommy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I most definitely think Madge is an angel, and appears at the time she's most needed. I thought from the first that this cafe appeared out of the blue. I look forward to more stories about Madge. This kind of story always leaves the reader feeling good. We need more of that.

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hello, my friend. Thank you for your kind words and shiny six stars. They are deeply appreciated!

    Have a great day, and God bless.
    mike
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a nice story, Mike. We all love stories like this one to think maybe our loved ones are not that far away and we will see them again some day. There are many such fictitious stories I know and this is a good one. Nancy:)

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi, Nancy. Thank you for all of your support and shiny six stars. They are deeply appreciated!

    Have a great day, and God bless.
    mike
Comment from robyn corum
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Mike,

Very cool. I like Madge. She seems like a very loving and warm-hearted person. Even if she is a bit 'other-worldly'. *smile* As far as what she might be - I'm thinking ghost more than angel since she has already lived here once. Hmmm.. Very cool to consider, though. haha!

Notes, if I may:
1.) "You think this is cool(.)" Jesse shakes his head.
--> this is an action tag, not a speech tag - they must be punctuated differently
--> I see that you're doing this repeatedly. For example, in the next paragraph (about this is 'so cool') you do this twice more. Seems to be an issue, so make sure you understand the difference. Yeah?? Find more info at the following cut and paste link:
--> https://amyisaman.com/writing-craft/lose-said-try-action-tags-in-dialogue/#:~:text=What%2C%20exactly%2C%20is%20an%20action,me%20back%3F%E2%80%9D%20Jane%20asked.

2.) They cross the river on an old metal bridge and hear it swirl and tumble below them.
--> They cross the river on an old metal bridge and hear (the water) swirl and tumble below them.
--> otherwise, it sounds like it's the bridege doing that -- and that would be truly TERRIFYING!! *smile*

3.) went to the restroom, and (i)vy now grows over the door.

4.) The (c)afe`, was brightly lit, and Madge was there to help in any way she could.
--> no comma
--> the word 'cafe' does not need to be capped unless it's part of a 'proper word' - Like a title - Madge's Cafe. When it's just cafe alone, you can use lower-case - check throughout the story to fix these, please.
--> you also don't need to try to replicate the diacritical mark at the end of 'cafe' - we've americanized it now and all know it used to be French.

Thanks so much! I like the idea of bringing Madge up in a series of stories. I look forward to seeing her again!






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 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi, Robyn. I've got everything fixed. Thank you for your kind words and help with this story. It's deeply appreciated!

    Have a great day, and God bless.
    mike
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi again. I wanted to nominate you for reviewer of the month, but I'm all out. Thank you!
Comment from humpwhistle
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Doesn't matter what name we give a soul like Madge's. She's as unexplainable as dragon fly landing on your finger. A moving and uplifting story, Mike. I think the sign that said 5-cent burgers kind of clued me in.
Also, I'm kind of curious about the old man at the end who explains about Madge's death and recurrences. You mention he had a camera around his neck, but never takes a picture. There's an old adage about playwriting. It goes, 'If you show a gun in act one, it had better go off by act two.' I have a feeling you had a purpose for the camera, but never used it.

Anyway, I enjoyed very much.

Peace, Lee

"She'll have (a) fit over me.

"All of this is for Breakfast?"--no need for the upper case B

"Don't worry, Honey. We'll be in Columbia soon. I love you, too."

"I love you, too. I'll be out in a minute." Cari blows him a kiss through the crack of --I think you have one too many 'too's.

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi, Lee. I'm glad you stopped by. Thank you for your kind words, help with this story, and shiny six stars. They are deeply appreciated!

    Have a great day, and God bless.
    mike
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh, how I wish I could give you a dozen 6s for this wonderful story, but I can't even give you one. That story gave me goosebumps, Mike. The hairs on top of my head stood up as I half guessed what Madge was. An angel, no less. This was beautiful, my friend, I loved it. A virtual 20 stars!!!! Love and hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi, Sandra. Thank you for your kind words and the thought of a 20. It's deeply appreciated