Fast Eddie
a shaggy dog western3 total reviews
Comment from eliz100
This is an excellent story. You met the criteria for a Shaggy Dog Story or a yarn. There is one small edit. "Well he didn't exactly by (buy) me diamonds. I enjoyed the vernacular style you wrote in. Good luck in the contest. Have a blessed day.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
This is an excellent story. You met the criteria for a Shaggy Dog Story or a yarn. There is one small edit. "Well he didn't exactly by (buy) me diamonds. I enjoyed the vernacular style you wrote in. Good luck in the contest. Have a blessed day.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
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thank you for your nice comments and for the catch. I've got to start going to bed earlier. can't spell when I write late at night:)
Comment from Susan Newell
I absolutely loved your shaggy dog story and chuckled through the whole thing. I loved the characters and the "hole shootin'." Eddie staring at D.D.'s belt buckle was a hoot. Good luck with this in the contest. Proofing notes follow.
Sue
as he dabbed a napkin at his ear. -- napkin seems a little refined for this story. Bandana?
She had stolen the key to the bank from the bank pres. Friday night, after plying him with drinks, and also managed to secure the passcode to the vault. -- I would eliminate the period after pres. I think you meant it as an abbreviation, but it reads like a sentence ender.
Eddie stood his 4'5"self as tall as he could. -- missing space before self
gave her a little pinch on the bottom, and she went bazurk, ==> berserk
"Well, you could say, he didn't exactly by me diamonds." -- homonym oopsie ==> buy
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
I absolutely loved your shaggy dog story and chuckled through the whole thing. I loved the characters and the "hole shootin'." Eddie staring at D.D.'s belt buckle was a hoot. Good luck with this in the contest. Proofing notes follow.
Sue
as he dabbed a napkin at his ear. -- napkin seems a little refined for this story. Bandana?
She had stolen the key to the bank from the bank pres. Friday night, after plying him with drinks, and also managed to secure the passcode to the vault. -- I would eliminate the period after pres. I think you meant it as an abbreviation, but it reads like a sentence ender.
Eddie stood his 4'5"self as tall as he could. -- missing space before self
gave her a little pinch on the bottom, and she went bazurk, ==> berserk
"Well, you could say, he didn't exactly by me diamonds." -- homonym oopsie ==> buy
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
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wow, lots of errors. thanks for the catches. I stay up too late, writing, and can't spell worth a hoot. :) Do you know I Googled the spelling of berserk - of course with my spelling and it didn't know - it kept spelling entirely different words. no help a'tall.
thanks again.
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Not many hiccups at all! That's a long piece and we all miss a point or two. That's why we have to rely on each other to catch them.
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well, thanks again!
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:-D
Comment from lindafisher
I love a bit of humour. There is so little of it on this site, that you are a breath of fresh air. I see this is a contest entry. Good luck with your story.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
I love a bit of humour. There is so little of it on this site, that you are a breath of fresh air. I see this is a contest entry. Good luck with your story.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
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Thank you so much! You made my day with that comment!!