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Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Love Texting "Fun for all
39 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
What a fun sonnet, Debi. Great job on its style. I enjoyed
reading it. Your lines flowed smoothly for the back and
forth texting between the couple. The picture you paired
was a great choice, too I could visualize everything as I read.
The ending was handled well. Sometimes, we get caught up
being too dependent on our electronic devices. What a way
for her to find out she made a mistake. I liked the POV of the
woman. Hopefully, this incidence will leave a lasting impression
on her and him. Perhaps he needs to be more attentive, too.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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What a fun sonnet, Debi. Great job on its style. I enjoyed
reading it. Your lines flowed smoothly for the back and
forth texting between the couple. The picture you paired
was a great choice, too I could visualize everything as I read.
The ending was handled well. Sometimes, we get caught up
being too dependent on our electronic devices. What a way
for her to find out she made a mistake. I liked the POV of the
woman. Hopefully, this incidence will leave a lasting impression
on her and him. Perhaps he needs to be more attentive, too.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Thank you so very much Jan for such a lovely review and such kind words.
You are so kind and are always such a great help. I appreciate it more than you could know my friend. You are an Angel for all you do for me and so many others.
Comment from jake cosmos aller
nicely penned poem about disappointment in love, and not really understanding the other person, that life changes and people change too in unpredictable ways.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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nicely penned poem about disappointment in love, and not really understanding the other person, that life changes and people change too in unpredictable ways.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Lol, actually Jake after they texted back and forth for a while, they realized that she had the Wrong number any they both thought they were talking to their own lovers but they were talking to complete strangers. Lol
Thanks for the great review my friend!
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ah makes a great poem and story.
Comment from Anne Johnston
Well done on this one. Debi. Sounds like someone used the wrong number to text and created quite a problem. I once got a text at night, telling me that someone was running late, and would be at my house in an hour, then another one a bit later, saying they had been delayed further. I never did know who it was from, and since no one showed up, I figured they had the wrong number.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Well done on this one. Debi. Sounds like someone used the wrong number to text and created quite a problem. I once got a text at night, telling me that someone was running late, and would be at my house in an hour, then another one a bit later, saying they had been delayed further. I never did know who it was from, and since no one showed up, I figured they had the wrong number.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Lol, Anne, that would be a weird feeling to wait for someone to show up, not knowing if it was a wrong number or not.. On one hand it might have freaked me out a little and yet intrigued me, on the other hand.
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I believe I did text back after the second one, telling them I thought they had the wrong number.
Comment from lyenochka
I was thinking is this one of those love relationships ended with a break-up by texting? And then the final couplet shows a lighter side. It seems that the phone messaging is mixed up because of using the wrong number. Best wishes in the contest!
Suggestion for meter in this line but only if you agree:
I am saying that you are not my Jim
I realize that you are not my Jim
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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I was thinking is this one of those love relationships ended with a break-up by texting? And then the final couplet shows a lighter side. It seems that the phone messaging is mixed up because of using the wrong number. Best wishes in the contest!
Suggestion for meter in this line but only if you agree:
I am saying that you are not my Jim
I realize that you are not my Jim
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Hi Helen, this is no contest. I just thought I would try another sonnet. So this is my second I know there are some parts that need improving, but are you using realize as a three syllable word?
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Yes, as RE ah LAYZ
No need to change if you don't say it that way! 😊
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Please tell me what you think of this ending that I figured out. I have a correct number now for him.
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That's clearer but it's that final couplet that is missing the iambic meter - the da DUM da DUM da DUM etc.
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Then in that case I love your ending. I didn't realize that realize was three syllables. After all I come from the land of the Scandinavians and the Ole and Lena jokes. So I will try your ending. Dolly's didn't get the message or the humor to shine through.
Later, my friend. And do I appreciate you? Ya sure, You betcha!!!! hehehe!
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I got it! It depends on how fast your read the poem!
Per the syllables:
https://www.howmanysyllables.com/syllables/realize
Appreciate you, too! 💕💖
Comment from LateBloomer
Ha, ha, ha. Very good, very cute. I had two same names in my phone. I called the wrong one up and chewed her out from Hello. When I was done, she said, you dialed the wrong--she know the other one. Lol. Believe me. She was so happy that it wasn't her. I laughed hysterically because I know how happy she was. Also, laughing made me lighten up a bit. The actual phone call was more cordial.
Of special note:
I've been using the wrong number to reach him
(Great punchline.)
This is a poem that many can/will relate to. Love can sometimes be rocky. Xo. M
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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Ha, ha, ha. Very good, very cute. I had two same names in my phone. I called the wrong one up and chewed her out from Hello. When I was done, she said, you dialed the wrong--she know the other one. Lol. Believe me. She was so happy that it wasn't her. I laughed hysterically because I know how happy she was. Also, laughing made me lighten up a bit. The actual phone call was more cordial.
Of special note:
I've been using the wrong number to reach him
(Great punchline.)
This is a poem that many can/will relate to. Love can sometimes be rocky. Xo. M
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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Well Miss Late Bloomer, I am going to have to talk to your daughter and have her put you on the payroll. You are worth more than any nanny that I know of. Hope you are having a good week with the kids.i sure hope you never have to call me up and give me heck, even if it is the wrong one. Lol.. Take care and thanks for the fun review for my silly sonnet. I appreciate it so much. Thanks again my lovely sotu...
Comment from barbara.wilkey
LOL Thank you for sharing this post with us. It was fun to read. One of my daughters-in-law's accidentally sent and 'I love you' text to my son's grandfather. We all got laugh out of it at her expense. LOL
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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LOL Thank you for sharing this post with us. It was fun to read. One of my daughters-in-law's accidentally sent and 'I love you' text to my son's grandfather. We all got laugh out of it at her expense. LOL
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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Barb, I bet there was a lot of laughter at your house. And knowing you,I bet your daughter in-law knew it was all in fun!
I thank you once again for your awesome review and fun comments. I think that is why I love to do my fun endings on some poems; the reviews are so much fun! Thank you sweet friend for the smile you gave me in return!
Comment from Sally Law
LOL! This has happened to me and thankfully it wasn't this serious. What a fun subject for a Sonnet. Your brain is on the comic side these days and it's continuing on in this one. I so enjoyed this!
I wrote a Petrarchan Sonnet once and it quelched the desire to write one ever again. I think my brain caught fire. Hahahahaha! That explains a lot!
One small improvement, if I may.
For the last line, trim it down to 10 syllables like the others.
Perhaps:
I used a [diff'rent] number to reach him.
Different can be shortened by one syllable in this way and you still have your rhyming ends: Jim/him.
I hope this is helpful and adds to your fine work.
Sending you my best today, and love and blessings always.
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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LOL! This has happened to me and thankfully it wasn't this serious. What a fun subject for a Sonnet. Your brain is on the comic side these days and it's continuing on in this one. I so enjoyed this!
I wrote a Petrarchan Sonnet once and it quelched the desire to write one ever again. I think my brain caught fire. Hahahahaha! That explains a lot!
One small improvement, if I may.
For the last line, trim it down to 10 syllables like the others.
Perhaps:
I used a [diff'rent] number to reach him.
Different can be shortened by one syllable in this way and you still have your rhyming ends: Jim/him.
I hope this is helpful and adds to your fine work.
Sending you my best today, and love and blessings always.
Sal XOs
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Oh no Sally, that was supposed to read, I'm using the wrong number to reach him. I do not know how that other phrase got in there. I counted my syllable perfectly. But thank you Sally Marie, I appreciate your idea too. Since I did the latest update to my system, it will put different words in my writing without even asking permission.. Thank you for your suggestions and especially for letting me to the error. I appreciate that more than you could know.
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Oh, I am sorry, sweetheart. Yeah, my system does that to me too. My blind assist keyboard holds typos. I cannot fathom why, but it does. If I type too far in, it automatically chooses something for me whether it is appropriate or no. As my eyes have deteriorated , it has become more of an issue. It did not occur to me you had that problem too. Anyway, I am glad you have it figured out and repaired. Love, Sal :)) XOs
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I have been waiting to feel a little more relaxed to read your latest story. I don't want to rush it, but I might have to because I am more excited than ever.
Comment from Terry Broxson
LOL, well, that is embarrassing! I wonder if the wrong Jim's girlfriend is checking his texts and now looking for you. Better keep a sharp eye on any strangers. Well done. Terry.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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LOL, well, that is embarrassing! I wonder if the wrong Jim's girlfriend is checking his texts and now looking for you. Better keep a sharp eye on any strangers. Well done. Terry.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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Hi Terry, I thank you once again for your awesome review and fun comments. I think that is why I love to do my fun endings on some poems; the reviews are so much fun! Thank you sweet friend for the smile you gave me in return!
Comment from Joanne Gill-Maddick
Another great piece of writing debi. That's so awesome. Your sonnet has a great flow and rhyme. Nice artwork to compliment your words as well. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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Another great piece of writing debi. That's so awesome. Your sonnet has a great flow and rhyme. Nice artwork to compliment your words as well. Nicely done.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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Hi Joanne, I thank you for your awesome review and fun comments. I think that is why I love to do my fun endings on some poems; the reviews are so much fun! Thank you sweet friend for the smile you gave me in return!
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Your welcome my oldest brother passed away yesterday debi I am heartbroken 😥
Comment from Tom Horonzy
hahahhahahah. You are such a cut up It is as if we came from the same bloodline, but you received more HDL than I, which is the good cholesterol since you always win anything the two of enter.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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hahahhahahah. You are such a cut up It is as if we came from the same bloodline, but you received more HDL than I, which is the good cholesterol since you always win anything the two of enter.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2023
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Hi there Tom, I thank you once again for your awesome review and fun comments. I have always felt that we were like siblings, with borderline sense of humor's. Borderline of what, not sure but we are not boring and I appreciate yours as much as anyone here! I think that is why I love to do my fun endings on some poems; the reviews are so much fun! Thank you sweet friend for the smile you gave me in return!
