Reviews from

Heart Crafted Poems - 2023

Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "A Pitcher of Hope"
Musing of an old man

31 total reviews 
Comment from ESOSTINE
Excellent
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Well penned. Silence truly presents us with opportunity for reflection and wisdom. I found this apt for my own country and its people as they go into presidential election this Saturday after years of horror of failed leadership, the young having taken their fate in their hands are sending strong message to the old hawks with rekindled hope of better outcome. They have gained immense wisdom from their silence of past years of terror and hardship in the hands of the politicians. Lol.

 Comment Written 22-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    I wish for you and your peoples that possible change with a youthful, energetic, responsible group can lead from there heart not there bank accounts, unlike the stay forever politician in the US.
Comment from Jessica Wheeler
Excellent
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This was terrific. Your words were inspiring and encouraging. I love the message of positivity and hope you express. I especially love the line about no news equaling good news!! Well done thank you for sharing.
Jessica

 Comment Written 22-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    Jessica, thank you!
Comment from JT traveller
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Incredible poem. Evocative and powerfully written. I want to quote back to you so many of your lines that spoke to me but, thanks to your expertise, there are too many.

Your use of metaphors, antonyms and emotive descriptions are admirable.

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    JT, I am beyond words of encouragement and gratitude, thank you.
reply by JT traveller on 22-Feb-2023
    My pleasure. A magnificent read.
reply by JT traveller on 22-Feb-2023
    The pleasure was all mine in reading and learning from your words. Jacqueline
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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Wow! This is another stellar entry to this contest. Now I'll be really stumped to vote on this. Fabulous Glosa poem and I liked how you described society today especially in these lines:
The senseless strains of today's hopes and dreams;
youth lost in the vortex of failed systems,
And how you used the poem's quoted line at the end was perfect! Hope this does well in the contest!

However, as daunting as this, might sound (remove comma after 'this')

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    Oh my thanks for your ever thoughtful eyes to see that pesky comma. Smiles of abundant thank you?s?..
Comment from jake cosmos aller
Excellent
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you nailed the glossa form my friend. Just a perfect tribute to the underlying poem about life, and its mysteries. I like the last stanza the best, sums up the poem.

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    Jake thanks!
Comment from Atiri
Excellent
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I loved this work, especially when you talked about "the problems unseen." I feel like this can apply to a political or personal situation. Keep up the great work.

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    Atiri, yes and yes! Thank you!
Comment from Brandon Clark
Excellent
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"However, as daunting as this[,] might sound" no comma needed here

"Knowledge pours in like a[n] flowing pitcher" a instead of an

"and egoic unconscious use of "free will." Wondering if you meant egotistic?

None of those take anything from this very well crafted poem and I have mild OCD...lol

Hope that helps and Best of luck in the contest!
Brandon

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 22-Feb-2023
    Hi Brandon, thanks caught the comma, I intended to use egoic as this means the person not the people. And the original poet used the an flowing so did not feel I have poetic license to change his words. I sure value each of your thorough insights, Be well!
reply by Brandon Clark on 22-Feb-2023
    I see, thanks for clarifying, I understand and agree. Adding egoic to my lexicon...lol
Comment from Pam (respa)
Excellent
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-Nice artwork and presentation.
-Good quotes and effective imagery.
-A very good opening verse establishes the premise established by the quote.
-Very good examples in verse two, "creating a false narrative..."
-Verse three shows the difficulties people face,
"But each of us must keep our heads mindful ..."
-A very good concluding verse that shows
"as bad as life has been presented,
you, me, or them must always cling to hope."
-Well done. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 21-Feb-2023
    Pam, thank you for your thoughtful review.
reply by Pam (respa) on 21-Feb-2023
    You are welcome, Jim.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
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I agree, silence breeds wisdom and hope guides us through life.

Excellent entry for the Glosa Contest. You grasped the glosa form well. It looks so hard to do. Your descriptive words flow well

Good luck in the contest.

Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 21-Feb-2023
    Gypsy, thank you .
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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I am not a poet, and this makes my third Glosa poem I've read. I am hardly an expert in the form or any poetic form. I did happen to really enjoy reading this poem. Thank you for sharing and good luck witht he contest.

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 21-Feb-2023
    Barbara, thank you for your kind words and good wishes.