Victory
Be careful fighting dragons3 total reviews
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Very cool visual to go with the fantasy-inspired theme of your entry. I have a piano student who canNOT get enough dragon-themed moments in her life. I think she would love your poem, too! Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2023
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Very cool visual to go with the fantasy-inspired theme of your entry. I have a piano student who canNOT get enough dragon-themed moments in her life. I think she would love your poem, too! Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 10-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2023
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Thank you so much!
Comment from Paul Manton
Good morning fellow writer.
As a great fan of Wagner's opera (but certainly not of the man) I am used to dragons - but who would not be after 'Game of Thrones', half the content of Netflix et al - and the thousands of books, games and toys with which we all grew up.
Dragons may be our friends (as in Anne McCaffrey's 'Pern' Series) or our nemesis - as in Lord of the Rings, but they are certainly mighty, elemental creatures - better to befriend, lest they turn you to stone or to ash.
A possible minor typo - in the first line, British English (I write from London this morning) uses a second 'e' in 'breathes' - if that is true in the US too, you need to add it.
Yes, a perfectly good 5-7-5 haiku - but, if I may, and because this is in a contest, I can advise you (and if you are FS Royalty you will do what you please) that the preferred formatting of haiku is to have no capitals or punctuation whatever, but a dash at the end of line 2, separating the first two lines from the satori ending. The caveat to that is that all proper nouns retain their capital.
I notice with approval the assonance within the three lines and the half/rhymes at the end; the satori works well, so this is a successful poem.
Well done.
Paul
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2023
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Good morning fellow writer.
As a great fan of Wagner's opera (but certainly not of the man) I am used to dragons - but who would not be after 'Game of Thrones', half the content of Netflix et al - and the thousands of books, games and toys with which we all grew up.
Dragons may be our friends (as in Anne McCaffrey's 'Pern' Series) or our nemesis - as in Lord of the Rings, but they are certainly mighty, elemental creatures - better to befriend, lest they turn you to stone or to ash.
A possible minor typo - in the first line, British English (I write from London this morning) uses a second 'e' in 'breathes' - if that is true in the US too, you need to add it.
Yes, a perfectly good 5-7-5 haiku - but, if I may, and because this is in a contest, I can advise you (and if you are FS Royalty you will do what you please) that the preferred formatting of haiku is to have no capitals or punctuation whatever, but a dash at the end of line 2, separating the first two lines from the satori ending. The caveat to that is that all proper nouns retain their capital.
I notice with approval the assonance within the three lines and the half/rhymes at the end; the satori works well, so this is a successful poem.
Well done.
Paul
Comment Written 10-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2023
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I appreciate your suggestions and will edit. Yes, that was a typo, again thanks. I play Dungeons & Dragons, as well as watch the shows mentioned, so yes, dragons are definitely part of my life. Thanks!!!
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Glad to hear it.
Good luck in all your competitions.
Paul
Comment from Barry Penfold
Like this a lot. The image and the words go nicely together. Makes sense and all appears fine as far as the rules go. All the best for the competition. Have a great day.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2023
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Like this a lot. The image and the words go nicely together. Makes sense and all appears fine as far as the rules go. All the best for the competition. Have a great day.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
Comment Written 10-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2023
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Thank you so much! I am glad that you enjoyed it and I appreciate you reading and reviewing.
