Klaatu Barada Nikto
Never underestimate someone's desire to be dead.2 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
This reads like one of those over the top scenes from a movie. How can anyone be that destructive when they are angry and have anything in their life?
Your writing is excellent as the images you create are vivid. You certainly left me shaking my head. I hope I never meet Veronica unless she is on her meds.
I love the movie, "The Day The Earth Stood Still". I may have to pull out my video and watch it again.
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This reads like one of those over the top scenes from a movie. How can anyone be that destructive when they are angry and have anything in their life?
Your writing is excellent as the images you create are vivid. You certainly left me shaking my head. I hope I never meet Veronica unless she is on her meds.
I love the movie, "The Day The Earth Stood Still". I may have to pull out my video and watch it again.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2023
Comment from Loretta Bigg
This is really excellent and there is only one thing I would change if I were you (but I'm not you, so do whatever you like.) For my taste, you have too much exposition at the beginning of the story when you should be grabbing the audience with your fantastic action and fantastic dialogue. And it isn't necessary, because you fantastic action adn fantastic dialogue tells us all this, and anything you think is missing you can thread it in along the way. That's my two cents. Great work.
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This is really excellent and there is only one thing I would change if I were you (but I'm not you, so do whatever you like.) For my taste, you have too much exposition at the beginning of the story when you should be grabbing the audience with your fantastic action and fantastic dialogue. And it isn't necessary, because you fantastic action adn fantastic dialogue tells us all this, and anything you think is missing you can thread it in along the way. That's my two cents. Great work.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2023
