Rekindled Passion
After giving up on true love, my True love comes along.6 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I am glad you found true love and it is often the case that when we are not looking, our true love walks into our life.
A suggestion for this line:
The sound you hear, is the Roar which comes (from) flames within my hearth;
I wish you luck with the contest and welcome to Fanstory Leonard, love Dolly x
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I am glad you found true love and it is often the case that when we are not looking, our true love walks into our life.
A suggestion for this line:
The sound you hear, is the Roar which comes (from) flames within my hearth;
I wish you luck with the contest and welcome to Fanstory Leonard, love Dolly x
Comment Written 21-Oct-2023
Comment from l.raven
Hi Leonard, first welcome to our FanStory
family...and hope you will like it here...
there are a lot of talent and wonderful people
on this site...
about your poem...you need to light the coloring...
it's a bit hard to read...
when we find true love....it becomes unconditional...
you become as one...forever...
very nicely written...and if you should ever need help...
just ask someone...you can click on our names...and leave
messages...love Linda xxoo
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Hi Leonard, first welcome to our FanStory
family...and hope you will like it here...
there are a lot of talent and wonderful people
on this site...
about your poem...you need to light the coloring...
it's a bit hard to read...
when we find true love....it becomes unconditional...
you become as one...forever...
very nicely written...and if you should ever need help...
just ask someone...you can click on our names...and leave
messages...love Linda xxoo
Comment Written 21-Oct-2023
Comment from Bill Schott
I copied and pasted your presentation in my Google docs page so I could actually read it. The small font and bright color is going to make many people just want to skip it.
Anyway, the hyperbole of lofty language makes the sentiment here seem to go either way. The love is too good for regular words, or made laughable through this verbiage.
Thou hast blown upon the dying embers of mine heart and stirred the fire within my soul...
The sound you hear, is the Roar which comes the flames within my hearth; The Hearth whose mantle bears your name.
Continue to grace me with thou Breath of Love and the return to thee is a Kiss
A Kiss from Desire itself
And Desires warmth, will be thine Embrace Forever.
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I copied and pasted your presentation in my Google docs page so I could actually read it. The small font and bright color is going to make many people just want to skip it.
Anyway, the hyperbole of lofty language makes the sentiment here seem to go either way. The love is too good for regular words, or made laughable through this verbiage.
Thou hast blown upon the dying embers of mine heart and stirred the fire within my soul...
The sound you hear, is the Roar which comes the flames within my hearth; The Hearth whose mantle bears your name.
Continue to grace me with thou Breath of Love and the return to thee is a Kiss
A Kiss from Desire itself
And Desires warmth, will be thine Embrace Forever.
Comment Written 20-Oct-2023
Comment from Douglas Goff
Ah the mighty 'roar of love' can be defeating. Seems the earlier relationships are the more strongly burnt into memories youth.
Good write-up. Hope the writing muse smiles upon you with a great victory in your competition!
D
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Ah the mighty 'roar of love' can be defeating. Seems the earlier relationships are the more strongly burnt into memories youth.
Good write-up. Hope the writing muse smiles upon you with a great victory in your competition!
D
Comment Written 20-Oct-2023
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is an excellent poem for the Love Poem challenge. Your descriptive words also help to bring the imagery alive. This is excellent work. I enjoyed reading it. This will draw in a readers and many will relate to this..
Best wishes,
Alexandra
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This is an excellent poem for the Love Poem challenge. Your descriptive words also help to bring the imagery alive. This is excellent work. I enjoyed reading it. This will draw in a readers and many will relate to this..
Best wishes,
Alexandra
Comment Written 20-Oct-2023
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Congrats on your first milestone and welcome on board! Firstly your post was quite difficult to read and, ideally, the font should be bigger and maybe the background slightly lighter. That said, I thought your free verse read well. I like the idea of your love being rekindled and, of course, fire imagery is the perfect medium for this. The roar is very evocative of the heat of passion and the remainder of your verse is expressed with tenderness and love. Well done and good luck! Debbie
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Congrats on your first milestone and welcome on board! Firstly your post was quite difficult to read and, ideally, the font should be bigger and maybe the background slightly lighter. That said, I thought your free verse read well. I like the idea of your love being rekindled and, of course, fire imagery is the perfect medium for this. The roar is very evocative of the heat of passion and the remainder of your verse is expressed with tenderness and love. Well done and good luck! Debbie
Comment Written 20-Oct-2023
